Hey :D Just wanted to say thanks to everyone who commented on what they thought of my story. & thanks to my wonderful Beta Trish. You are truly amazing. This chapter we have decided that it should be in Tyler's POV. So tell me what you think! Chapter Song is 'Near To You by A Fine Frenzy'. For those who haven't ever seen the movie Remember me, Aidan is Tyler's best friend and roommate in the movie. Just so you aren't confused.
[our emails regarding the story]
Trish: Wouldn't it be better to give Tyler a chance to tell his story from his point of view?
UselessIdeasXx:That's a really good idea.
Trish: & I bet you could make a really good video over it too. Oh I'm thinking about signing up on YouTube.
UselessIdeasXx: That's great are you going to vidd anything?
Trish: Well I don't know... Movie Maker is like the only thing I know how to use... so...
UselessIdeasXx: On with the story then (:
Setting: The setting takes place four weeks before 9/11(September 11, 2001) New York.
Near to you, I am healing
but it's taking so long
'cause though he's gone
and you are wonderful
it's hard to move on
yet, I'm better near to you.
Near To You~A Fine Frenzy
Chapter Two: The Understanding Of Loss
What the fuck was I doing? I didn't have girls in my bedroom I didn't fuck. It just wasn't me. There was something about her. Something fragile about her that made me want to protect her. I had never felt this way before. Aidan still wasn't home yet so I took this time to watch her sleep. She looked so peaceful at times then in pain. But still just as beautiful. She kept calling out 'Edward' or 'please don't leave me.' It was sometimes 'he's gone.' Then the God awful screaming. I didn't have the slightest idea of what to do for her. I tried to shake her awake but that made it worse. She finally stopped then started to talk. She would say the strangest of things.
I tore my eyes off the sleeping beauty to look out the window and enjoy the sunlight. I herd her stir and then sat up. She looked her self over and saw that her clothes were missing. Shit. That was the hardest thing to do was to undress her with a raging hard on. I battled with myself to either take her now or not. But I would rather her be awake and want to then wake up and not remember a thing and regret it. Plus I wanted to get to know this strange girl.
"Did we?" She waved her hand suggestively between us.
"No. I would never. You passed out so I took you to my place." I defended myself. She studied me for awhile.
"Then where are the rest of my clothes?" She pressed and crossed her arms across her chest. Of course she would want an explanation of why she was only half dressed.
"You fell in a puddle before I could get you so I washed and dried them for you." I said getting up and sitting on my bed beside her. I smiled at her and she started crying. She fucking started crying. She kept running her hands through the already messy hair. I couldn't tell if she was trying to tame it or mess it up more.
Bella finally stopped and looked up at me with tearful eyes. I couldn't help it, I moved her hair from her eyes. "Hey I don't know who this Edward guy is but, you seem pretty upset. Do you want to talk about it?" I offered my counseling. Which was probably not very good considering I have my own problems.
She told me about how she traveled half way across the country to come to school here and was looking for an apartment. She even told me about vampire's. Vampires? About how Edward left her because she would never be good enough for him. She also told me that I looked a lot like Edward. I laughed at the thought. I never accused her of being insane. Because I myself was truly insane. I talk in my dead brother almost everyday. She started to tell me about even seeing Edward and hearing him. I knew exactly what she was going through.
"I may look like him but, I would have never have left you." I don't know why the fucker would leave this beautiful girl behind. It was evident that she was in love him. But all I knew was I wanted to get to know her.
"Would you like to stay here? I mean until you find an apartment and all." I knew Aidan wasn't going to like this but, fuck him.
Her forehead creased as she probably wondered why a complete stranger offered her a place to stay. She finally spoke. "Um sure if that's okay? All of my stuff is in my truck" Her cheeks turned red and I fucking loved it. I had to see it again.
I leaned back looking at her from behind. She turned around and faced me and blushed again. It was too damn cute.
"Um where's my clothes?" She asked in an sweet innocent voice.
I smiled at her and said "Why? You look fine in those." Her face was bright red.
"It's kind of cold." Bella surprised me by saying this.
"Then get under the sheets" I playfully suggested as I sat up to go get her clothes. I watched her get dressed. She looked like a zombie. Like a robot just going through the motions of life with out really feeling anything.
"You've really had a pretty hard time, huh?" I asked as she sat back down on the bed.
She let out a gust of air "You have no idea." No Bella you have no idea.
"I know the feeling of loss, Bella." I said preparing myself for this long conversation I wasn't planning on having. But it only seemed fair to offer up my story and bare my soul as she had. "Would you like to hear about Michel?"
She looked up at me "Yes." she said in a quiet voice.
"Lets go to park for a walk and just talk."
"So you found him?" Bella said walking beside me enjoying the sunlight. Her eyes looked almost hazel in the sunlight.
"Yes. It was the most horrible thing I have seen in all my time." I confessed shoving my hands in my pocket.
"I don't know what to say." She said pausing to sit on a park bench. I had expected her to say she was sorry for my loss like everyone has in the past but, she was different.
"There really isn't anything to say. I just wish I knew the real reason why." I said leaning forward to but my head in my hands and just to stop the pounding in my head.
"I wish I knew why people do a lot of things." Bella said gazing off into space.
My father drove him to hanging himself. Even thought it was really never known why he did it, it always came back to my father. Michel was a lot of things but, what always stood out in my mind was him teaching me how to play guitar. My father never supported his decision to be a musician. It was always own your own business or join the families business or nothing.
"Same here." I whispered back. I let my thoughts drift and every once in a while I would look at Bella's face I could see the frown lines and desperately wanted them to go away.
"Do you ever think he'll come back one day?" Bella asked suddenly catching me off guard.
"I don't know. But I'm sure if you were as in love as you say, there's a good chance." I tried to sound as positive as I could.
"But how long can a person wait on someone?" Bella said taking off her sunglasses. Her eyes were sad and it only made me want to hold her.
"I've asked myself the question lots of time but, never really stopped waiting on my father to step up and be a father. My sister believes her own father doesn't like her. It maybe too late for me but, I refuse to sit back and watch her go through the same things I did." I ran my hands through my hair and took off my sunglasses.
Bella touched my cheek and said "You would like my father. He's like the only person that has been there for me all these years. He always said 'Life is just a mirror and what you see out there you must first see inside of you'"
"I think I would like him too." I smiled at her and took her hand in mine. "Would you like to be my...Friend?"
She laughed at my awkward question. I loved her laugh. After she was done smiling her face turned sad. "Just please don't expect too much more. My heart can't take much more."
"I really enjoy spending time with you, Bella."
"Just don't expect anything because, I'm not fixable. I just don't open up easily." She shoved her hands in her pocket and looked at the ground. "I just don't like getting attached to people and then they get up one day and decided they don't want me anymore. It's like a hole in my chest they can never be filled it never...Never gets better. I think some days I'll get better or that I'm doing okay but, it really never goes away. It feels like he just took my life with him."
"Well how 'bout I promise to get you life back? Maybe show you around New York. Take you out to dinner and maybe a movie?" Her expression turned from sad to playful. She had the most beautiful smile.
"I'd like that." Bella said squeezing my hand in hers.
"Would you like to go with me to meet Michael?
" Do you want to head over to get you stuff from your truck before we go?" I asked standing up/
"Yeah, sure." She said grabbing her coat. I grabbed her hand as we walked back to my car.
A/N: The first chapter is now on fan fiction. I'm leaving anonymous reviews open for anyone to review so you don't have to sign up and here is the video that goes with the chapter. Reviews=Preview video (: