This is a repost.

This chapter is real important set up for the whole story. I know it's a little sad but it gets more funny quickly after this chapter. This is my first fan fiction so please bear with me.

I don't own Twilight S.M. does, but I do own Charlene

Chapter 1

Into the darkness

I only got to reading the twilight books a year ago and was hooked. I refused to be called a Twi-mom, deep down I'm a Harry Potter mom more, but the romance of the Twilight books brought back so many good memories of my courtship with my husband. Do I believe in love at first sight, yes I do the moment I saw my future husband walk through the door I knew he was the one for me. We were engaged 3 months after we met and married 6 months after that and conceived our son on our honeymoon at Disneyworld. I fell in love with the twilight movies; I mean what red blooded woman no matter her age wouldn't swoon for Edward Cullen or Rob Pattierson? But I loved the books more, I must of read each one of them more than 20 times. Mostly due to my OCD of needing to remember it all, I dream of being picked to be on some game show and all these years of useless information I've stored about almost everything might win me big bucks someday. But never made it to a game show and all my little nuggets will be of no use.

I'm just watching my love ones looking at me trying so hard to be cheerful and keep my spirits up knowing that this time must be killing them more than in reality its killing me. I will get peace they will get this last memory of me sick in this god forsaking hospital.

As my eyes go to my son Charles, I feel so proud to be his mother. Charles is 22 years and in the US Navy stationed in Japan. He is 6 foot 3, really skinny (that boy could eat a whole cow and not gain an ounce) with dirty blood hair and what my father would call bedroom blue eyes that he got from me they are such a deep blue but change color with his mood like mine, the darker they are the more sad or upset he is, when he is happy they lighten up and sometimes get to a sky blue color and when he is depressed they turn gray almost. Charles just arrived from Japan on emergency leave to see me before I take the big dirt nap. I'm glad he has his life sorted before I go, he knows where his future is headed, once he is done with the Navy he wants to go back to his old high school and be a teacher.

"Charles," I begin, "thank you for protecting me and the rest of our country. I can never show how proud to call you my son enough." I pulled an index card out from under my blanket and hand it to him.

"Mom what's this?" he asks.

"That Charles is my meatloaf recipe. I know how much you love my meatloaf I figured you could give it to your wife someday, and hopefully when you eat it you can think of your old Mom." I just grinned at him. He just stands there with silent tears running down his face.

"Thanks Mom. I love you so much!" and he runs over and gives me a big hug and kisses my cheek.

As Charles is hugging me I look next to my other son Sammy. Oh my baby boy. He is just standing there trying to be so strong and not let his emotions take over and failing horribly. Sam is 16 years old and a junior in High School. I look at him sometimes just totally amazed. I still can't believe that this blond hair, blue eye, almost 6 foot child was supposed to die when he was born so early. He weighed just over 3 pounds and was on a vent for the first week of his life. Due to a delay of quicker treatment he developed cerebral palsy that effected his right side of his body. When he was 6 months old he still wasn't doing what he should be doing at that age and took him to the doctor and that's when we found out about it. Sam started Physical therapy, occupational therapy and Speech therapy within a week. We spent the next 5 years going to these appointments. Sam didn't crawl until he was almost 18 months, he didn't walk on his own until he was almost 3. Sam didn't talk until was three and half and his first word was Mama and it made my lifetime. Now he is mister showman, he wants to be so many things and if he keeps his determination whatever he chooses then he will get that goal.

"Sammy, you're my miracle and superstar." I tell him as I pull a pocketknife out from under my blankets. "Sam this pocketknife belonged to your grandfather when he was a scoutmaster and used to whittle a lot of different things during camping trips with the troop. I'm sure he would want you to have it. I was holding on till you got your eagle and I can see you will make it even though my body will not be there when it happens my spirit will be. I'll make sure somehow you know I'm there with your on that day."

Sam walks over slowly and takes the knife from me and studies it closely then looks up with tear filled eyes and says, "Mommy, oh Mommy why do you have to leave me? I want you here with me always." As he climbs into the bed with me like he is a little boy again and curls up with me and just holds me while the sobs just rack his body.

As my eyes travel from my youngest to my middle child, Katrina, Of course we hardly call her that unless she is in trouble but her nickname since birth has been Kitty. Kitty, my beautiful middle child, my only daughter. She has become my best friend these last few years, at 20 she has lost most of her baby fat and filled out with curves and a ample bust line that turn the boys heads where ever she goes. Kitty has light brown hair and blue eyes, she is the almost my twin at that age it is downright scary how much she not only acts like me but her voice and mine are so close that even my husband gets confused. But she is very picky on the guys she chooses to hang out with and refuses to date until she finds the "one". Frankly I think she really took those Twilight books to heart, but who am I to tell her she is wrong, hell I think she is right in her convictions, I personally couldn't have done it at her age. I look into those eyes so much like my own and with our own little game we have played since she was a child I say to her, "What's the password?"

"The cow is in the field." She reply's in a sad smile.

"Now, chin up girl, you know I believe in reincarnation and if someone ever shows up at your door and gives you the password, trust it's me even if your 97 o.k.?"

"O.K. Mom."

I pull out a small key and hand it to her.

"What's this Mom?"

"It's a key, can't you see that?" I joke.

"Jeez Mom, I know it's a key what's it to?"

"Other than you four in this room that key goes to a safe deposit box that holds my most prized positions and some letters that I want you to have. Please call Ruth if you need anything explained."

Kitty rushes over and hugs herself to me and kisses my cheeks, "I love you Mommy, you were always the best Mom and friend ever."

"Well Kitty I pity the man who wins your heart someday because he has a tough nut to crack, but I know you'll be able to keep him in line." As I smile at her.

"Oh Mom" as she cries.

Finally my eyes rest on the love of my life, Chuck. To me he looks the same as the day we married 23 years ago, sure we both lost and gain pounds, he also lost quite a bit of hair but I don't care he will always be the man who the moment I first saw him I knew I was going to marry him. I look at him and I know how hard these next few years will be for him. I beg him to go on living to find love again and be happy. He is a very easy man to love.

"Chuck…" I sob, "Oh Chuck god I wish I wasn't here right now in this damn hospital with this fucking tumor in my head. There were so many things I still wanted to do with you, so many places I wanted to see. Please keep your dreams sweetie, get your boat so you can go fishing on the Sound like we always wanted to do."

"I will Princess."I cry harder at his pet name for me since we first started dating.

"God I love you so much Chuck! I don't want to leave you." I scream

"Shhh, Princess," as he moves over and lightly strokes my hair, "I love you too, Princess, I love you too."

"Now remember Chuck if millions of dollars appear out of the blue in your checking account, take the money and run." I joke

"You better believe it Princess." He laughs and kisses me on the lips.

I'm starting to feel really tired.

"Remember guys how much I love you and I'll always look over you all"

I feel my eyes close and the sounds of my room get softer and softer. I realize this is it I'm about to die. Then I just feel the blackness all around me and then nothing.

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