Disclaimer: I don't own HP or any of these characters. That belongs to JKR, Scholastic Books, Warner Brothers, etc. This is just something to pass the time while waiting for the next book.
Sibyll Trelawney was not a happy witch.
She glared at her sixth-year Gryffindor class. Somehow, she just knew they were all laughing at her in their minds. Sure, they all looked like they were being studious, as they applied themselves to reading Tarot cards, but after all, you can't hide the truth from someone with the gift of the Inner Eye. They were laughing at her and there was absolutely nothing she could do to stop it.
Damn it! She had always known that genius is oft misunderstood. She expected and was even eager for people to misunderstand her—as a sign of her obvious talents, of course! However, no one had ever told her that her particular brand of genius would be ridiculed out right with students blatantly snickering at her constantly. All right—not so blatant as to do it out loud, but it's not as if that made a difference to one of her gifts.
It was all very vexing indeed. Trelawney attempted a McGonagall impersonation as she scanned the classroom to make sure the students would not give in to their inner laughter and instead remain on task. This only served to upset her even further, as Professor McGonagall was another of her many detractors. Trelawney would not put it pass her to actively encourage students to mock divination and its professor.
In fact, that made perfect sense! McGonagall was the head of house for no other than the Gryffindors. These were the Gryffindors that she was teaching. No wonder why they were so lacking in the proper respect to a Seer such as herself. McGonagall was actively influencing them. It was a wonder indeed that she had not managed to corrupt the shyly innocent Lavender Brown and Parvati Patil. Trelawney decided that she would have to get back her own at McGonagall. Perhaps by throwing a good hex or two at the wayward transfiguration professor. Except that would not exactly work as Trelawney would probably be transformed into something vexing, like a cat! There was nothing to do but to rely upon her vast verbal wit—some rather disparaging remarks about McGonagall's ever-present bun should do the trick. She was dying to use the advice from Lockhart's latest book on witty dialogue anyway.
It must be noted here that Trelawney's McGonagall impression was failing miserably. It was in fact so bad that one Mr. Weasley could not help but remark to one Mr. Potter that it appeared that batty old Trelawney had become cross-eyed. With boys being boys, they could not help but smirk at that remark. These smirks had the unfortunate reaction of drawing the attention of the already-irate divination professor to the two boys.
The smirks on their faces were enough to confirm Trelawney's earlier suspicions. They all were indeed laughing at her! And she was looking right at the biggest reason why—Harry Potter.
It was very clear to anyone with a modicum of sense that Mr. Potter was Marked For Death. Trelawney fancied that she could see images of his impending doom in the very air around him. Ever since she met she knew that he would not live to a grand old age. And while other professors may think it kinder to not mention the fact to the poor boy, she had no such inhibitions.
Or rather, it would be more accurate to say, to her mind at least, that she was attempting to prepare the poor boy and his friends for his eventual departure from the mortal coil. It was a public service really. They should appreciate her attempts to prime them for the harsh realities of life. Hence, she had been predicting his death as soon as she met him for the benefit of all her students.
Of course, she first met him when he was a third-year. He was still alive and breathing as a sixth-year despite all of her grandiose foretellings of death and destruction. It was very, very vexing indeed! And with that thought, Trelawney concluded that the sooner she could look up Lockhart's chapter on developing an impressive vocabulary, the better. She had just used the word vexing a number of times in the last few minutes and the repeated word was getting to be rather—vexing.
Argh! It was that word again! And it was all Potter's fault! Well, not all his fault, as McGonagall shared a good deal of the blame as well. But it was mainly his fault. Her students wouldn't be laughing at her right now if he had just died as he was supposed to. Sure, there would be no one to count on to fight You-Know-Who, but on the other hand, she would have finally gotten to say, "I told you so!" to McGonagall. Trelawney had briefly toyed with the idea of sticking her tongue out as well when the good news finally came, but she put that aside as being too immature and childish.
But the whole point of the matter was that Potter was making her a laughingstock by being alive, instead of dead. She fervently wished that the stupid boy would finally die die die DIE DIE!
Sibyll Trelawney looked down at the now-broken teacup in her hands. Damn it! Why had she been holding a teacup when this class was so obviously about reading the Tarot? She paused for a minute, trying to recapture her earlier logic. That's right—she had taken some tea to relax her nerves because all of her students had been laughing at her. Only now they were all staring at her.
With that thought, Sibyll's head quickly snapped up, meeting the astonished gaze of her entire class.
"Professor?" came Lavender Brown's soft voice, "Are you feeling well?"
Settling her flustered nerves, Trelawney smile reassuringly at Ms. Brown. "Yes, my dear, thank you for asking. I was in a trance and lost track of myself." She stood up. "Ah, my Inner Eye reveals that some of you have been dealt life-changing hands." With that, she walked over to Mr. Potter's desk. She just knew his cards foretold his doom and she was going to tell everyone about it.
Arriving at her destination, she glanced down at the cards spread on top of the desk. "Indeed, my Inner Eye has once again revealed the truth! For Mr. Potter has a very interesting hand." She immediately saw the Tower card, reversed. While she had not kept up on all the various meanings of the cards, she was rather sure that card in that position meant a big change was in the wings. And she could make that into a death omen easily—the big change would be that Harry Potter would finally die like he should have long ago!
At least, that was her plan, until she heard Mr. Weasley whisper to her victim, "I bet you five sickles that she sees your death in those cards."
"What else would she see?" Mr. Potter replied. "Actually, I almost wish she would make one. Her death omens don't scare me all that much any more. Makes me feel rather safe as none of them have yet to come true."
It was very fortunate for the two Gryffindors that Trelawney did not have her wand on her. Otherwise, she would have attempted to turn them both to teacups, which she would promptly hand over to Neville Longbottom for use. Those two obnoxious boys were acting worse than the rest of her class! McGonagall had corrupted them almost to the point of no return. They were getting to be as bad as that Granger girl! At least with Granger, she sort of had her revenge two years ago with all the rumors flying around about what a bad little girl Granger was.
And with that thought, Sibyll Trelawney conceived of the most perfect revenge to enact on Harry Potter, and Hermione Granger too. And seeing them suffering would have the additional benefit of making McGonagall miserable as well!
"The Tower, reversed," she started, pointing to the card on Harry's desk. "This signifies a great change will occur in your life today." She stepped away from the desk, so as to better face her audience. "Indeed, I sense that one of your relationships will undergo a great revolution today. What you have always thought of as friendship . . . it will go beyond that and become the deepest, most passionate of loves! Mark my words, all of you—Harry Potter and Hermione Granger are more than just friends!" With that pronouncement of doom, Trelawney fell dramatically to the floor, twitching all the while.
"That's just great," said Ron Weasley. "At least we got a little variety this time. Should have taken me up on that bet Harry." He good-naturedly elbowed his best friend, who was still staring at the twitching Trelawney on the floor.
Harry looked up at Ron and sighed. "Actually, I think I would have preferred her usual. The last thing I need is for those rumors to start up again." He looked around the room, only to see that all of his classmates were eagerly watching the scene. "Hermione is not going to like this one bit."