A/N: The one thing I hate about being a writer is how easy and difficult it is to come up with ideas. I got this idea while reading a Fullmetal Alchemist fanfic for RoyxEd. It was the word 'fallen'. So now, of course, I have to write a NaruSasu oneshot. And not work on any of my other 5 or so stories... I'll make such a great novelist (sarcasm).

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. Damn.

A lot of people seem to be under the impression that I fell for Sasuke Uchiha. Wrong. A powerful ninja such as Naruto Uzumaki would never fall. That's ridiculous. No, there was no falling involved.

I jumped.

And quite frankly, I'm glad I did. When I finally managed to figure out my feelings for the beautiful bastard, I didn't run away like some pathetic little girl. Oh, hell no. I embraced those feelings. I spent a whole day locked up in my cramped apartment just getting used to this idea that I loved him. And then I spent another day annoying the hell out of Sasuke.

And yeah, that might seem like a stupid thing to do, but I had put some serious thought into it. I wanted to know if Sasuke loved me back, so I figured the best way to do that was to see how much he would put up with. So I did everything I knew would piss him off.

Let me take you through the steps:

1) Wake Sasuke up at 4AM by throwing a glass full of ice-cold water on him.

2) When the inevitable "What the hell, Naruto!" is thrown out, tell him that you were bored.

3) Dodge random flying objects.

4) After calming him down (accomplished with green tea, a freshly sliced tomato, and a ten-minute vow of silence), convince him to go out for ramen.

5) Order 10 bowls of any kind of ramen at Ichiraku's (only one of which goes to him), and spend the whole time talking about Sakura.

6) Sneak out as the bill arrives, leaving him to pay for the meal.

7) Avoid 20-30 shuriken and kunai aimed directly for your head and chest.

8) Challenge him to a duel (not of wits. No offense brain, but you'd let us down every time. We've already had this discussion), and the start yelling about how he needs to get in shape.

9) Don't feel too bad when he kicks your ass. It's not like it's the first time. And besides, you were going easy on him... Right?

10) Continue sparring until you're both exhausted. Try not to stare as you see sweat trailing down his uncovered chest, just begging to be licked off, and his cheeks flushed and hair sticking to his face but also sticking up in the back, more so than usual, just as you'd expect it to look after you pull on it in the heat of the moment, relishing in his lusty moans as you fu-

...Sorry, where was I?

Oh, yes:

11) Invite yourself back to his place and start singing loudly and very, very off-key as he makes dinner (which isn't ramen, the bastard.)

12) Take up his apron's invitation and 'Kiss the Cook' on the cheek. Blink owlishly and poke his forehead when he blushes cutely.

13) Dodge kitchen knife, large frying pan, and a blender.

14) Realize at some point during the meal that you've actually gone through this routine before. In fact, it happens almost every day.

15) Get tired of waiting and ask him out on a date. Kiss him full on the lips when "Took you fucking long enough, dobe," is his reply.

16) Spend the night at his place. *wink, wink*

And so, that is how you find out if Sasuke Uchiha loves you back.

"So that's how! Thanks, Naruto! With that advice, there's no way Sasuke-kun could not love me. See you later."

And here I thought Sakura was smarter than me. I guess not.

She'd just better hope that Sasuke doesn't hurt her too bad.

-page break-

...Next Day...

"So, teme, did anything interesting happen yesterday?"


"I'll take that as a... growl. Seriously, teme, use your words. And no, 'hn' does not count."

"I think you know what happened, usuratonkachi."

"Nope, I don't think I do."

"Sakura broke into my house while it was still fucking dark outside, poured freezing water on me, forced me to eat ramen, tried to spar with me, and then followed me home. She even had the audacity to try and kiss me!"


"Well, it's not like I let her. I'm not desperate," then quietly, "Besides, I've already got you."

He's so damn cute when he blushes.

-page break-

You know that feeling you get when you're falling? The dropping of your stomach and the absolute terror and shock? I've never been much of a fan of that feeling. I prefer that rush of adrenaline you feel when you purposefully slip over the edge, the butterflies you get in your stomach right beforehand, and the excitement that leaves you shaking right after. That's the feeling I get just from being near Sasuke.

He'll send me a look and it'll make me light-headed. His touch... well, imagine that you're looking down the side of a cliff, and you know for a fact that there's a shitload of everything you could ever possibly want down there waiting for you. And his kiss... that's when you feel the ground disappear beneath your feet, but you're just floating for an indefinite period of time. And everything that comes after that? It's perfect.

And that shitload of everything I could want isn't ramen or the robes of a hokage or anything like that. It's just Sasuke.

He's not waiting to catch me, or anything cheesy like that. He's there to watch me hit the ground. But at least I know he'll help me up. Right after slapping me over the head and calling me a dobe, of course.

A/N: Wow, this is the shortest thing I've written in a while. And there's no lemon. I must be getting lazy... Oh, wait, I've always been lazy. Nevermind, false alarm. And Naruto and Sasuke are kind of OOC (Naruto would never have this kind of vocabulary in real life), but whatever. Apologies to anyone waiting for Cor Unum to be updated or another addition to Ways of the Underside. As I said, I'm lazy. But they will be updated. Just... not quite yet.