Death By Diamonds and Pearls – Band of Skulls was the song that was kinda the inspiration for this and I suggest you go listen to it. Crackin' tune. :D

I would like to thank Racey very much for reading through this and correcting some (particularly retarded) mistakes. Much love to you, Hun :)

I'll be waiting for you; hard and wet.

I stare down at the sheet of paper Ichigo has just passed to me.

My hands are trembling and my face feels hot and sweaty; I think I'm going to vomit... from the feel of it, it could be projectile.

I stare at the note.

We've been sending messages to each other all lesson, making comments on Matsumoto-Sensei's boob size and debating what films to watch this weekend. We then argued about whose house to go over. Ichigo won because he said his bed was bigger (at the time I was furiously trying not to come in my pants from all the naughty thoughts that danced around inside my head, whilst also trying to figure out how bedsize was relevant to anything).

But in the end, I agreed that his house was best.

I'll be waiting for you; hard and wet.

Was his next reply.

So here I am, sat in Physics with an aching boner and the uncontrollable urge to walk over to Ichigo (two seats in front of me) and fuck him spineless over his desk.

But I can't do that; I've never done that.

Because, you see, me and Ichigo aren't going out. We aren't... anything really. I suppose we have an odd sort of friendship.
Nel is my cousin (and self-proclaimed best-friend) who likes to hang out with Orihime. They have some sort of big titties club going on...

Anyway, Ichigo is friends with Orihime. This resulted in me spending a lot more time with Ichigo and Co.

But that was way back when we were in first year and now, two years later, me and Ichigo have a really weird but functional relationship.

He is different from everyone else.

A small and scared part of me says he has always been different.

I gang up with Ichigo and we tease Ishida about his crush on Inoue, I spend a lot of time with Keigo (because we're both stupid), Tatsuki is like a violent big sister, but she's got a huge soft spot for me and Ichigo always complains that she likes me best. Chad is into the same music as me, so we exchange CD's and go to gigs together.

Then there's Ichigo. He's my accomplice in almost every single one of my evil plots to annoy the teachers. In fact, even when we're not plotting or studying or at school, we're always together.

He is my very best friend.

Then it gets a little bit weird.

We pretend we're homosexuals.

Holding hands, staged kisses, the smacking of backsides. You name it.

My ringtone has been 'GayBar' by Electric Six for nearly a year. We flounce about declairing our undying love for each other and I bought him a pink thong for Valentine's Day as a joke.
This behaviour in itself might not be too odd. I mean, we all know those guys who aren't gay, but hug each other, right? And Ichigo is so sarcastic and funny that no matter what we do, it always gets a laugh. No one takes us very seriously, which is fine by me. I need to be taken with about a pound of salt. My sense of humour is pretty dumb.

"Don't be stupid," Ichigo told me after we got drunk one day at Chad's house (everyone else was playing twister). "Your sense of humour is brilliant! You never get offended and see the funny side to everything." He stopped talking and studied me. I wanted to laugh because Ichigo's eyes were so out of focus, he just looked constipated. "You've got one of those laughs that's infectious. You could get the entire school to laugh at a stick if you found it funny."
I snorted because sticks were pretty amusing. Simple pleasures.
Then Ichigo laughed as well and the beautiful noise gave me butterflies in my stomach.
"See?" He said, as if he had just unravelled the mysteries of space and time. "You even work on me."

I grin at the memory.

But anyway – me and Ichigo. Things eventually began to get complicated; at least for me.

After I bought him his thong for Valentine's Day to celebrate our (pretend) relationship and the amazing sex we had together, he went to the toilets and put it on. I wasn't sure whether to laugh or not; the noise I was trying to make sort of got stuck in my throat at the thought of Ichigo wearing a thong. But I forced it down and laughed with the others as Ichigo emerged from the boys' toilets, victorious.

But he refused to drop his pants to show anyone his sexy new lingerie, so by the end of break time, no one believed he had really done it.

Then in the lunch line, as we were queuing up to get our spaghetti bolognaise, Ichigo turned to me and swiftly tugged at the side of his school trousers to show me a thin pink strap that sat on his hip.

He grinned at me and thanked me for his wonderful gift.

I tried to smile back but I was horrified.

I had an erection.

Then it all went downhill from there.

We'd act out our passionate scenes of homosexual love, we'd hold hands and skip home, Ichigo even brought in a bondage magazine and kept approaching me asking for my input into his sexy surprise for me when would get home – and the whole time... I half believed what he was saying. That day, I had to remind myself more than once that there would be no tied up, leather clad Ichigo on my bed waiting for me.

The next day we acted like we'd been up all night having dirty sex.

The people in our class found us hilarious; I found myself rock hard and masturbating in the toilets at school because Ichigo kept coming up to me and whispering in my ear, sending violent jolts of pleasure down my spine.

From there it escalated.

Not just in our outrageousness, but in the way we behaved with each other.

During the odd occasion when we weren't pratting about being bum bandits, I realised Ichigo was a really precious friend to me. He'd smile at me softly when I would catch his eye, he'd throw an arm around my shoulder and listen to my woes about being adopted and not really having a sense of belonging (my parents are amazing, it's just that I went through the childcare system, which was weird and, at times, very scary). I felt he was the only person in the whole wide world who understood me and wasn't mortified or disturbed by what he found (other than mum and dad, of course).

But the severe homoerotic undertones in our behaviour began to grow. Not just at school, but at home when we were alone as well. He'd call me babe and lean on my shoulder, and the fine line between what was real and what was fake became horrifyingly blurred.

But no one noticed; it was just an act.

I was terrified. I felt stupid and helpless. What could I do? Thanks to Ichigo, I was severely confused about my sexuality and I didn't even know what normal was anymore.
I made a decision late one night, my own jizz staining my bed and hands, my dick still pounding from my orgasm – I was going to fight back!

I'm fucking Grimmjow Jeagerjaques! No one fucks with me and makes me feel like a moron!

I'll make Ichigo regret the day he tried to mess with my head...

And so it began.

In front of two teachers and approximately 67 students (I spent ages stalling, counting the audience we would have and wondering if it was really worth it), I groped Ichigo's bottom and bit his ear telling him in a loud, husky whisper that he had to hurry home after school because I had to punish him. I said I'd make him beg and cry.

Everyone turned to gape at us and you could have heard a pin drop in the silence that followed. We had never quite been this outrageous. It was usually playful banter, not scenes oozing with sexual tension.

It was Ichigo who managed to revert the situation into a joke by claiming that his 'bum-a-lum' was still sore from this morning.

People laughed, then turned back to whatever they were doing, but I felt Ichigo's steady gaze on me as I walked off to the vending machines.

Still, the flirting continued, but he didn't let me up-him again for a long while. It became a sort of competition; a battle to embarrass.

At the end of the day, I was a sexy beast and I had a shit-load of girls offer me their cherries, but Ichigo had his wit and sarcasm; I was still ridiculously confused.

Then once, Ichigo didn't just embarrass me, he made me feel and look like an idiot.

One thing that really knocks me down is when people underestimate me and say I'm dumb or a retard. I know I'm not the best at the academic side of things, but I'm damn talented at drawing! So appreciate me just a little bit, please!

I think I'll probably go to Art College.

So when people say I'm dumb, I just... Uhhh, it just bugs me and I usually punch them, but this time it was Ichigo.

For once we weren't flirting, we were in Maths.

"Grimmjow, if you'd be so kind as to do the next sum?"

Our maths teacher, Aizen, is a sadist. He likes to watch stupid people suffer. I'm stupid; therefore, I'm an ideal candidate.

I couldn't do it. I'm not being pessimistic or dramatic, I tried; this sum was just really, really hard and I stood there for a full 7 minutes trying to figure it out. I could feel the eyes of every other person on the back of my head. Aizen just sat at his desk and watched me, a cruel smirk in place. He didn't offer help or assistance when he saw I was struggling.
Eventually, the embarrassment became too much and I admitted defeat; turning towards Aizen to give back his pen.

He said my work was wrong. It was also an example of how to never, ever do that particular sum.

As I walked back to my seat, I tried not to look at anyone. They all knew maths was my weakness and were all silent throughout the ordeal, so I can only assume they all felt sorry for me and my lack of brain cells.

Then as I walked past Ichigo, he snorted.

I stopped and stared at him.

"What?" I said, loudly and clearly, looking him right in the eye. The whole class was frozen.

He looked taken aback for a second, but then he scowled at me when he noticed my aggressive behaviour.

I guess it was a moment of weakness, but I was just so sick of everything. I was so unsure and unconfident about everything with me and Ichigo - and now I'm the class retard.

On top of it, Ichigo just snorted. He was laughing at me. But of course, the sum was easy for him.

"Wait." I said, turning my back on him and striding to my desk. I swung my bag over my shoulder and shot him and angry glare. "I don't want to know."

I caught the look on Ichigo's face as I stormed out of the classroom; a mixture of annoyance, guilt and hurt.

That just made me angrier. Why is he annoyed? He's a freaking genius!

He apologised grudgingly a few days later, but things were still tense. Ichigo claims he did nothing wrong and I was still grouchy because I wouldn't say why I was so offended. I mean, making someone feel retarded isn't illegal. I'm just being over-sensitive.

Still hurt, though.

So to claim back my (gay) manliness, after break, when everyone was filing back into class, I slunk up to Ichigo and wrapped my arms around his chest. I kissed his cheek and my lips burnt but I ignored it.

"Ichigo, I really need you right now." I whispered desperately.

Then Ichigo did something quite odd.

He squawked, grasped the cheek I had just kissed and went bright red. He turned, not to glare at me like usual, but to gape at me in horror, his mouth ajar. He looked truly ruffled.

I sauntered off before he could come up with a comeback, and I should have known he'd extract his revenge. And here it is.

I'll be waiting for you; hard and wet.

It's just a note on a piece of paper. Ichigo's pretty bright, I was sure he could have come up with something better. But it was the simplicity of the whole thing and the meaning the words held that made me shake.

At first, I was quivering with arousal; Ichigo's words were crude and to the point.

Then, I got angry.

He just wants revenge. He's taunting me. This isn't real.

I was suddenly so mad at myself for ever believing I had a chance; for being strung along like a puppy.

I decided that I would tell Ichigo I didn't want to do this anymore; it was unhealthy, and there was this one pretty girl who confessed to me last week...

Yeah. I'll end this gay parade.

My resolve lasted all day and I avoided Ichigo.

As soon as the bell rang to signal the end of school, I was bolting home.
"Grimmjow, you're in a rush," my mum mused, watching me walk around the kitchen in my boxers, frantically searching for some clean clothes in the laundry basket.

"Yeah," I said vaguely, pulling on some clean jeans and a black wife beater. I tugged a grey jumper over the top and kissed my grinning mother on the cheek before tearing from the house again.

Twenty minutes later, I was knocking on Ichigo's front door. Isshin appeared almost instantly. Yuzu and Karin were stood directly behind him; Yuzu carrying a load of empty shopping bags and Karin looked bored.

"Hey," I said, "is Ichigo in?"

"Grimmjow!" Isshin wailed. "You always come over to see Ichigo! What about me? Don't you wanna see your precious Papa-Issh?"

Karin scowled and kicked him down the drive. Yuzu invited me over for dinner and told me she hadn't seen Ichigo, but he was probably in his room.

They leave and I toe off my shoes, making my way to Ichigo's bedroom and feeling my stomach twist uncomfortably.

Ok, Grimmjow, get a fucking grip. Just be honest. You're sick of this.

It hurts too much.

I sigh, feeling miserable.

I'll give everything I own if god teleports me away from here.

He doesn't, so I turn the door knob.

His room is the same as ever. Ichigo is sat casually on his bed reading a book.

"Oh, hey," he says, noticing my presence and sitting up, chucking the book onto his desk.

I scratch my head and wonder absently when I fell asleep. This has to be a dream. There is no way this is real.

Ichigo is sat on his bed, as cool as a fucking cat, wearing the pink thong. He is wet (soaked in lube?) but not hard – maybe he wants me to help him with that part?

Nonononononono – NO!

This is a stupid dream – I've been hit by a car and I'm in the hospital, in a coma – THIS IS NOT REAL!

But then Ichigo is looking at me intently.

I am quite aware that I probably have a very visible erection.

"I'm sorry I was a dick in Aizen's class," he says suddenly. "I'm sorry if you feel I've been messing with you." I just stare at him with raised eyebrows.
"I didn't know... how I felt about you until the joke had gone too far. I'm sorry," he says again, drawing his knees up to his chin self-consciously, and looking a little forlorn.

I start screaming.

I'm screaming because that was just VERY REAL Ichigo behaviour.


I begin to pull at my hair and the full horrible impact of the situation punches me in the gut, and I feel like I'm about to dry-heave.

I sink to the floor because I genuinely thought that this was a dream and that I might wake up at any moment – I am being very serious here!

That's how stupid I am.

I just... feel so incredibly retarded. Not just because of the dream thing, but because I was ready to come in here and tell Ichigo to fuck off and now he wants to be with me (I think), and is saying sorry and I've been such a fucking prick!

I've curled into a hedgehog-like ball on the floor and I'm apparently wailing because I register Ichigo's warm (nearly) naked body sit next to me. He rests his head on my back and tells me I am an idiot, but so is he, and there's nothing wrong with that, and he wouldn't want me any other way.

But this only makes me want to cry.

However, obviously, this would be extremely emasculating so instead, I unfurl from my hedgehog-like state and Ichigo is grinning at me when I am finally sitting on the floor normally.

"Sorry," I say, my voice hoarse. "Just to confirm. Why exactly are you wearing a thong?"

Ichigo looks sheepish then goes slightly pink.

"I was trying to seduce you, but you staggered in looking stoned and I thought I'd better apologise seriously before..."


He kisses me.

It only lasts about two seconds, and when he pulls away it feels like my face has been blown off.

"Ah." Is all I can say.

I thought about cracking a joke and calling him a dirty whore like I do at school when we are feeling particularly brave.

But seeing Ichigo sat next to me like he is, smiling gently, all I feel is an overwhelming urge to just touch him.

So I do.

"Lean back," I mutter, moving over him and trying to ignore the fact that I am probably bright red. But Ichigo complies, never looking away from my face. I'm sort of kneeling between his legs and I can tell he's uncomfortable as he spreads them wide enough to accommodate my torso.

I spend a few seconds looking at his lips, then I decide enough is enough.

It might have been too soon; too rushed, but with nearly two years of foreplay flashing through my mind, my dick wasn't waiting for anyone.

I leant down to kiss him properly. His lips weren't like a girl's. They were soft, sure, but there was a hardness - a persistence in them that no girl I've ever kissed has had.

My lips worked slowly against his, at first. I hadn't ever kissed a boy before. Then his arms came up and wrapped themselves around my neck, weaving into my hair.

I groaned, and my cock throbbed uncomfortably in my pants.

We kissed again, this time more fiercely. Our tongues crept out and his mouth was so warm and tasty, I'm sure I nearly came right there. One of my hands was bracing me above him, the other on his neck, tilting his head up to our kiss. I got hungry and bold.

My hand began to creep down his body.

Did I mention I was grinning like a maniac the whole time?


Well, I was.

My hand moved down from his neck and stopped over his heart, which was thrumming frantically under my hand. I pulled away from his hot mouth, ignoring his surprised look, and began to kiss and lick downwards. I came to his nipples and girls like this sort of thing, right?

I took one in my mouth and flicked it with my tongue.

Ichigo whined, his hands fastening themselves into my scalp. My balls went blue.

"Take this off," I rasp, my hands gliding over his hips to touch the straps of the thong.

"But I thought-" He begins, looking nervous and a little befuddled.

"I just wanna see you," I tell him.

This isn't like the gay porn I've watched. We aren't thrashing about like eels or smacking each other or tying each other up. This is nervous and unsure and fucking awkward.

And more brilliant than I could have ever imagined.

As Ichigo slides the thong off his legs (which are tanned and sprinkled with strawberry blond hair, and long and lean, and I think I want to eat him) I notice just how aroused he is. One moment its an obvious pink-clothed bulge, then next minute, the pants are off and there he is in his birthday suit.

"You too," he rasps, folding his arms self-consciously, as I drink him in.

He is beautiful. Everything about him is otherworld-ly. My prick is slightly bigger than his, if I remember correctly, but he is positively bewitching me.

This will be quick.

I'm ram-rod hard.

"Grimm," he prompts, "you too. Take your clothes off."

I obey, stripping my shirt off. My socks and jeans follow. I'm in my boxers. Then, I'm not in my boxers.

Getting naked isn't so bad, I think, feeling light headed. But then I catch sight of Ichigo's face.

His cheeks are pink, but he is openly staring at my body and I can practically feel his eyes licking me.

I grin at him knowingly, but crawling onto his bed with a boner is actually impossibly embarrassing.

He laughs at my expression and suddenly I'm on top of him. Then there's a hand on the curve of my spine and our pelvises are pushed together.

The first thing I register is how smooth his skin is and how good another dick against my own feels. Then, I'm shivering and so is Ichigo. But it's a good kind of shiver.

I rest my body against his, letting my weight push him into the mattress. He whines and moans and wriggles, and I just lie there trembling because this just feeling like one huge orgasm.

Then he bucks.

Instinct. Animal instinct.

This is more like the porn I've seen.

I push my hips towards his own and the friction is amazing. Over and over. We grind and Ichigo is making the most delicious noises.

It's as if I actually forgot about coming because there's suddenly a lot of hot breath and I can't contain my voice anymore.

Still we push and buck and grind and pull each other even closer. One of Ichigo's hands is like a vice on my hip; the other is running up and down my back as we move together.

He looks a little delirious now and his voice is getting higher and louder. His face is sweaty and red, but his eyes burn a bright amber and he still doesn't look away from me.

He sucks in a huge gasp as he comes, his face frozen, his eyes rolling into the back of his head as hot warm liquid shoots from his dick. Then he's boneless and grinning.

I stop bucking because he's exhausted and I am as well.

"Here." His hand, still shaking from his release, is then between my legs, stroking me furiously.

I'm ashamed to say I made a lot of noise because Ichigo's hand was unexpected, and I was maddeningly close to my orgasm.

When it hit me, seconds later, I dug my head into the crease of his neck and groaned loud and long as I felt myself ejaculate onto Ichigo's stomach, body trembling; my heart thundering like an earthquake.

We showered together, Ichigo's family came back and we all helped make dinner; we ate and laughed at Isshin, then Ichigo walked me home.

I held his hand tightly all the way.

When I got back mum must have sensed something. She didn't ask, but simply smiled at me and offered me a ketchup sandwich.

I wasn't quite sure how to feel about it (not the ketchup sandwich, Ichigo).

Happy, of course. But there was something more; something quite confusing and scary and unexplainable and pretty fucking awesome.

I dropped my sandwich.

I heard mum's exasperated chuckle as I fled the house. I met dad at the front gate but only stopped to say Hi before breaking into a run.

"Where are you heading, Grimm?" I hear him shout after me. "I don't even get a hug?"

I scowl, suddenly feeling a little guilty. I skulk back to my dad, frowning.

He grins at me, knowing he's being a nuisance, before pulling me into a bear hug.

"It's a school night, you know?" He says wisely – as if he's some great sage.

"Oh really? I wasn't aware." I say sarcastically, rolling my eyes. But dad sees right through my agitation and, still grinning, ruffles my hair and tells me to 'sort my life out and get a haircut'.

I scowl, but inside feel loads better – I didn't even know how nervous I was until suddenly the buzzing anxiety isn't there anymore.

He grins (irritatingly) at me one last time then turns to go into the house.

I stand there for a few seconds clenching the gate and collecting my thoughts before I spin on my heel and run like a loon up the street to tell Ichigo about this wonderful feeling.

Just for those few of you who are a little slow (don't take offense, this is also for my benefit in case I ever forget what I was trying to imply, haha), Grimmjow is chatting about love.