Disclaimer:  Trouble Breathing is © of Alkaline Trio, and All Final Fantasy material is © of Squaresoft, but the fic belongs to me.

Trouble Breathing

By: ZellyBaby

Quistis slowly stumbled through the training center and into the small balcony type place that was deemed the 'secret area'.  She stared out across the ocean.  They were somewhere close to Matron's home.  She sighed and leaned over the rail letting her head rest on her hands.  Suddenly the door opened, she quickly turned toward it.  And in walked a short spiky haired figure.  She realized why he was there and tried to go past him and escape but was too sedated, she stumbled and he caught her.

"Quisty…thank freakin Hyne that I found you."

He pulled her close as she weakly struggled.

"Zell…let me…go…."

"No, I can't let you do this."

The scene he had seen just minutes before flashed into his mind.  The empty bottles that littered Quistis bed, the open pack of razor blades, and the almost empty bottle of vodka laying on its side in the floor near the door. 

You told me, that you wanna die…

"Just…let me go…you can't stop me…."

She started struggling for something in the pocket of her uniform.  Zell grabbed her hands and held them close and firmly to him.

I said I've been there myself more than a few times, and I go back every once in a while…

"NO Quistis, you are not going to do this, I'm not letting you make the same mistake I almost did."

Zell's eyes started to fill with tears but he blinked them away, but a few escaped and slid down his cheeks when he saw Quistis staring at his wrists.

You called me lucky, you called me lucky…

"You were so close Zell….lucky guy…."

Hearing that statement more tears started running down his cheeks.

"Quisty…please don't say that…please…you know what I did was wrong…please…"

"Guess what Zell, I'm not going to be stopped, you're not going to stop me."

In her resentment she started speaking more clear and struggled harder out of pure determination.  Suddenly she stopped Zell took advantage of the situation and held her tighter.

"Look at them Zell, just look at the stupid things."

You said tonight is a wonderful night to die, I asked how you could tell you told me to look at the sky, look at all those stars, look at how goddamn ugly the stars are…

He stared at her in confusion.

"Look…at what?"

"THE STARS, Zell, the goddamn stars, all happy up there in their desolate worlds, with no problems, beautiful yet ugly, they live for a long time, stupid things."

His confusion became slight anger as he continued to hold her closer to him so that she couldn't struggle, especially not for the object in her pocket.

"Quistis, why the hell are you doing this?"

She looked back to his face, and glaring at him with clear yet clouded blue eyes.

Its one or another, between a rope and a bottle, I can tell you're having trouble breathing…

"You should know yourself dear Zell…you should know it all too well…"

Cause you'll never be okay…

You'll never be okay…

You'll always be in pain…

You'll always feel this way…

Cause things they never work out right…

The wrong way the lonely way…

You'll always be in pain…

Again she glanced at his wrists.  He looked away, once again blinking away the tears as he slowly started to reconcile. 

"The loneliness…the pain…its too much for me to bear Zell…please…let me go…please?"

His gripped loosened slightly as she slowly started to slide her hand toward her pocket again but the expression his faced darkened suddenly and he resumed his tight grip on her.

You told me that the daylight burned you, that the sunrise was enough to kill you, I said maybe you're a vampire, she said it's quite possible, I feel truly dead inside…

"No, I will not let you do anything Quistis, this is shit, you know things can get better…"

Cause you'll never be okay…

You'll never be okay…

You'll always be in pain…

You'll always feel this way…

Cause things they never work out right…

The wrong way the lonely way…

You'll always be in pain…

"Zell…I saw it…"

His eyes went wide realizing what she meant.

"You can't hide those fresh marks on your wrists all the time…."

Her eyes suddenly closed as she drifted into the land of the unconsciousness.

"Oh shit…Quisty…"

He held her closer and slowly started to get up when he felt something warm and sticky on his arm.

Don't forget to let your life rot you inside out…

She had slipped and slit her self without him noticing.  The cut run from the base of her palm vertically down about four inches, he stared in disbelief wondering how she had done it without him noticing.  The blood-streaked razor lay on the floor at his feet.  He cried out and quickly stood up and started out of the room and through the training center.

Don't forget to let your life rot you inside out…

He slowly came to a stop as he neared the exit of the training center.  He looked down at her pale face, her pale soft face.  He hugged her closer and started to walk slower not wanting to jolt her with his running, he still kept his pace quick, but he once again slowly came to a stop, and hugged her even closer knowing already what had happened, she had stopped breathing.

Don't forget to let your life rot you inside out…