Title: Destiny's Laws
Author: Shenandoah Risu
Content Flags: none
Season/ Spoilers: season 1/ none
Characters: The Destiny Crew
Author's Notes: Written for challenge #019 "Murphy's Law" at the LJ Comm sgu_challenge. Cobbled together from various sites on the internet.
Disclaimer: I don't own SGU. I wouldn't know what to do with it. Now, Young... Young I'd know what to do with. ;-)
Thanks for reading! Feedback = Love. ;-)
One morning the Destiny crew found a large sheet of paper tacked to the wall in the mess hall.
"This week's morale booster!" it proclaimed importantly at the top. Below the headline it said: "Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. Murphy's Law. What's your version?"
By the end of the day, the following had been scrawled underneath it:
Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
- E. Young
Some people manage by the book, even though they don't know who wrote the book or even what book.
- Z. Rivers
Never make anything simple and efficient when a way can be found to make it complex and wonderful.
- A. Brody
Dimensions will always be expressed in the least useable terms. For example, velocity will be expressed in furlongs per fortnight.
- D. Volker
In a mathematical calculation, any error that can creep in, will. It will be in the direction that will do the most damage to the calculation.
- N. Rush
All's well that ends.
- S. Spencer
You cannot successfully determine beforehand which side of the bread to butter.
- D. Becker
The man who can smile when things go wrong has thought of someone he can blame it on.
- A. Dunning
It is never wise to let a piece of electronic equipment know that you are in a hurry.
- D. Boone
No child throws up in the bathroom. (Trust me, I've babysat enough neighbors' kids to know!)
- C. Armstrong
Paper is always strongest at the perforations.
- C. Wray
Tell a man there are 300 billion stars in the universe and he'll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint on it and he'll have to touch it to be sure.
- J. Franklin
If you are a graduate student working on string theory, then the field will be dead by the time you get your Ph.D. Even worse, if you start over with a new thesis topic, the new field will also be dead by the time you get your Ph.D.
- L. Park
If you are not thoroughly confused, you have not been thoroughly informed.
- R. Caine
Any cool program always requires more memory than you have. When you finally buy enough memory, you will not have enough disk space.
- E. Wallace
You may have the better plane, but the enemy is the better pilot (or vice versa).
- M. Scott
If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed toward you.
- R. Greer
The better you do your job, the more likely you are to be shot, injured, complained on, sued, investigated, or subpoenaed on your day off.
- C. Gorman
A clean (and dry) set of BDUs is a magnet for mud and rain.
- V. James
Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable. Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable.
- H. Riley
Your nose will itch the very moment your gloved hands get contaminated with bodily fluids.
- T. Johansen
If someone giving you directions says at any time "You can't miss it," be sure that you will.
- A. Palmer
All unmarked beakers contain fast-acting, extremely toxic poisons.
- D. Inman
If you have `cleared' all the rooms and met no resistance, you and your entry team have probably kicked in the door of the wrong house.
- B. Curtis
When the chicken finally gives it up traffic stops instantaneously.
- Destiny ;-) (Gotcha!) hee hee hee