Characters: the Stepford Cuckoos
Pairing: implied Julian Keller (Hellion) pre-slash (but the focus is on the girls)
Timeline: Way early on in New X-Men; Academy X
A/N: I have no idea if I've got the girls personalities right; I'm pretty much just going on their characterization from Phoenix; Warsong.
Feedback: is a must!
Disclaimer: Not mine. I play with other people's toys.
First Posted: August 26, 2010

*-so hot.* Three blonde heads swivelled at the stray thought that grazed their minds. They could easily pick out the student walking in the other direction. An image, a very detailed image, joined the words. *I've gotta stop this.* The girls could feel his disgust with himself, clear as day. *Stupid.*

"C'mon!" A voice complained verbally. "Move." The Three-in-One glaired at Alani but resumed walking.

*Should we tell him?* Celeste wondered as they continued down the hall.

*Yes.* Phoebe replied at the same time Mindee thought *No.*

*Why not?*

*It's none of our buisness.*

Celeste sighed in mind. *I guess you're right.* She admitted. *But I wish we could.*

*There's nothing stopping us.* Phoebe argued.

*It's none of our buisness.* Mindee repeated.

*So? Who would it hurt?*

*Well, Julian, for one.*

*How would it hurt him? We'd be helping him.*

*I doubt that's how he'd see it.* Mindee thought. They pushed their way through the large doors and walked outside. *Hellion's too proud. He'd be horrified we know.*

*In the short term.* Celeste began, *But in the long run-*

*-they'd both thank us.* Phoebe finished.

*Sure. If they didn't kill us for prying in their privet lives first.*

*If they don't kill us?* Phoebe smirked. *Can you really see-*

*You know what I mean. And Julian Keller alone is scary enough. I have no desire to piss off a hot-headed telekinetic.*

*You worry too much.* Phoebe chided as they sat down on their favourite bench.

*No I don't.*

*Oh, you do too. Doesn't she, Celeste?*

*I don't know.* Celeste hedged. *But I doubt there's a way to tell Julian without him getting mad at us.*

*He'll get over it. Sex is magical like that.* Both of Phoebe's sisters turned and gaped.

*How would you know?* Mindee demanded. Phoebe tossed her head.

*Oh, please. Like you haven't figured out how Miss Frost and Mr. Summers resolve all their disagreements.*

*Eww!* Celeste shrieked and on either side of her, Mindee and Phoebe leaned away. *I didn't need to know that!*

*She must have better selective memory then we do.* Phoebe thought to Mindee as though Celeste couldn't hear as well.

Mindee nodded. *You're not kidding.* She agreed. *I still think it's none of our buisness.*

*And I still think we should tell him.*

*Me, too.* Celeste thought, after she'd recovered from the bad mental image.

*Two against one. You're out-voted, Mindee.*

Mindee rolled her eyes and huffed. *Fine. But we're coming up with a way that isn't as obvious as 'Hey, Julian, we know you've got a crush and it happens to be reciprocated' because-* Her thoughts were cut off as a green Frisbee flew at them. The Cuckoos ducked at the same time, just barely avoiding being hit.

"Hey!" Phoebe yelled angrily. "Are you blind?"

"Sorry!" The toy's owner called, running toward them. "Rockslide's blind."

*This is too perfect!* Celeste thought excitedly.

*No. You can't possibly-* Mindee trailed off, horrified.

*Why not? Not time like the present.*

*You're both crazy!* Mindee jumped to her feet and smiled at the lizard-like mutant. "We're fine." She assured. "And just so you know, I have no part in this."

"What-" Mindee spun around and headed back inside before the question could be finished.

"Ignore her." Phoebe said. "It doesn't matter."

"Oh... 'kay."

Mindee could feel Anole's fear of what was to follow, even from inside, just as clearly as the other two could.

"Actually, Victor, if you have a moment, there's something we want to tell you." Phoebe said. Celeste giggled. Mindee groaned.