Where's my happy ever after?

Author: mrstrentreznor

Title: where's my happy ever after?

Rating: NC-17 for sex, underage drinking, language
Fandom: Twilight
Pairing: Jake and Leah

Feedback: please and thankyou

Summary: both Jake and Leah are unhappy with their lives; the remnants left after imprinting.

Disclaimer: the characters and all recognisable situations belong to Stephenie Meyer- this is a work of fan fiction, except for the legends and histories of the Quileute which, of course, belong to them. I pay my respects to their gods.

Thanks to BanSidhe for betaing

AN: this starts after the end of 'what was he thinking' - so Paul has imprinted on Bella in my AU and they live together – Jake was deflowered by them and took up girls and dating for a cover story – Jake is alpha and Sam is semi retired as Emily has just found out she is pregnant

Chapter 1 Not our job

Jacob Black thought that the pack had handled more than a few changes in recent years. Paul imprinting on Bella had certainly thrown everyone for a loop, but it was all sorted out now. At least Paul and Bella were living happily ever after, but Jake was sulking today.

And the last thing he officially needed today was Leah Clearwater in his face. He had made her his second in command of the pack; his beta. She had run with it, almost literally. She was imbued with a new sense of purpose. But as a result she wanted to work the pack even harder than Jake thought was reasonable.

"Oh, come on, Leah," he grumbled, "We don't need double patrols. The number of vamp sightings has dropped off so dramatically. Our reputation is hard earned and they are staying out of this area."

"Well we should expand the patrols then, see if we can cover more ground, protect more people," she said.

He gave her a withering glance. "Sure sure, we could protect all of Seattle if we wanted as well. But it's. Not. Our. Job."

It all sounded very reasonable, but he knew the real reason she wanted to expand patrols; the pack was the only thing she had left now. Sam and Emily were expecting a baby. It would be the first pack baby and everyone was over the moon. Except for Leah.

He understood, any pathetic last hope she had that Sam might come back to her was fading. Sam was a different man now; Jake had stepped up to the alpha position and Sam had gratefully gone into semi retirement. It was just too hard to have two Alphas. With the easing of his pack responsibilities he had become more like the old Sam. He was softer, he smiled more and it was tearing Leah's already damaged heart into more pieces. He was her Sam again.

The hard-faced uber-responsible pack leader was a thing of the past, but his love for Emily? That had remained a constant. Jake wondered if Leah had hoped that when he stopped phasing, the imprint would fade too. Jeez, she couldn't really have been hanging on for that could she?

He gave her a look.

"What?" she grunted at him.

He probably shouldn't have said it, but he did; some boils needed to be lanced. "Did you really think the imprint would fade when he stopped phasing?"

She blinked; she went to say something and stopped. She shut her mouth with a snap, her eyes glistened with unshed tears, and she turned on her heel and stormed out of the room.

Fuck, he didn't mean to make her cry. In fact he couldn't remember the last time he had seen Leah cry. Fuck.

He sighed heavily, rubbed his eyes and wished, not for the first time, that he had never become a shape shifter.

He stood there for a while contemplating his life when he heard people approaching. He could tell it was Quil and Embry from the chatter. They were arguing about something from the Iron Chef, as per usual.

"Hey Jake," they tumbled into the house and the three of them started for the kitchen.

Embry looked troubled. "Leah was crying," he stated.

"Yep," said Jake.

"You made her cry?"

"Effectively."

"Dude," said Quil.

He sighed and sat in one of the kitchen chairs. They both just watched him. Jake sighed again.

"Well come on then," said Quil, "stand up and let's see it."

"What?"

"Your new asshole; she must have ripped you a new one right?"

Jake snorted. "This time I hit dead on without even realizing. She didn't say a word."

Embry raised an eyebrow.

"She actually thought the imprint would fade when Sam stopped phasing," Jake explained.

"Fuck, why would she think that?" Embry was incredulous.

"Yeah," agreed Jake, "as if she could think the Sam she knew and loved would leave Emily."

"Not a chance in Hell after he ruined her face," put in Quil.

"Not a chance after she had made a life with him. And the baby is just an extra. He would never leave her, with or without the baby." Embry shook his head. "Sometimes I wonder what the hell is wrong with Leah."

"Yeah I mean I started getting dumped in… what… kindergarten? Didn't do me any harm," Quil argued.

Jake and Embry just looked at him.

"Okay…maybe I am not the best example…but you know what I mean. People get their hearts broken every day and they get over it. Why is she so bound and determined to hang onto this? Even Jake here got over Bella."

"Hey!"

"Eventually…" added Quil.

"Right…that is it! Speaking of new assholes, Quil," he threatened.

"Yeah?" Quil gave him the universal gesture of 'come over here and say that', "Bring it Black."

Jake threw himself out of the chair and tackled Quil. Chairs went flying; Embry sat up on the kitchen counter out of the way with his legs tucked up under him.

At that precise moment Billy Black wheeled into the house with Old Quil.

"I am having a flashback," quipped Billy, "its yesterday… no wait…. they're six years old…no…"

Embry chuckled, "We were just talking about kindergarten."

By this time, Jake had got Quil in a headlock and Quil palmed the floor in a signal of defeat.

Jake got to his feet and did his Rocky imitation. His knuckles almost brushed the ceiling he was so tall these days. "Still the champion," he crowed. "I am going to take a shower. We still on for clubbing guys?"

"Yep," they chorused.


Leah ran out of the Black home and dashed the tears from her cheeks. Unfortunately she almost ran into Quil and Embry. They could see she was crying and they could probably smell it anyway. She just kept running.

Oh if only she could do that; just keep running. If only she could escape from it all.

She jogged to her favourite clearing in the forest. On patrol she had found dozens of beautiful secret places like this one. She crossed her legs and sat down with a thump. She hated crying. So why was she doing so much of it these days?

Jake had really hurt her; mostly because she knew deep in her heart that he was right. She had clung to some bizarre hope that she would get back 'her Sam'; and she had, he didn't phase anymore but he was still with Emily and now they were having a baby.

That hurt even more because she doubted her ability to have a child anymore. Not something she had ever even thought about until the choice was taken away from her. She never wanted kids, but to be told you couldn't have them? That made her feel old; dried up and old. She was a freak; a menopausal 21 year old.

It was like some cosmic joke. You have extreme strength, a long life, an ability to heal and no reason to do so. In the legends Taha Aki had three wives; probably because he lived so freaking long. He must have watched his first wife wither and die and then gone out and got another one. And then he must have done it again. And again.

She had thought it might all be temporary. But she couldn't even retire herself; stop phasing, because that would leave her with nothing at all. That she really didn't think she could handle. And what if nothing went back to the way it was?

She tore at the leaves with her fingers and wiped more tears from her cheeks.

Imprinting; she hated it! Paul had ignored his imprint for months and had continued to behave like the rez man whore he was and bed anyone that offered; until Bella had approached him. But Sam, the alleged leader and strongest of them all had bedded Emily within a day of meeting her. He had been engaged to her and he had never even tried to fight it. If Paul could do it, why hadn't Sam tried?

She had spent two weeks rushing around in a panic because she thought he was dead or dying somewhere; she was so worried about him. She didn't know he had phased, turned into a wolf and couldn't turn back again. And then he comes out of the forest and imprints on Emily and her whole life is destroyed; all her plans for the future, just gone…

And once they knew about imprinting the council had done some more research. You didn't need to be the sexual partner of your imprint; you would be whatever they needed you to be. So she had to come to the obvious conclusion that Emily had needed to bed Sam; her best friend's fiancé. It was a double betrayal.

If Emily had said 'no', Sam as the perfect imprint partner would have taken 'no' for an answer. If Emily had really been her best friend, she would never have fucked Sam.

She hated them both.

FF_2154210_ - 16/11/2010 01:06:00 AM