DISCALIMER: I don't own CSI Miami and i don't make any money from it.
Warning: Sex read at own risk.
"I can't do this, I…I just can't," Calleigh could hear herself say the words over and over long after she had hung up the phone the night before. She had cried herself to sleep after hanging up, tossing and turning not knowing what to do. She didn't want it to end, yet she knew it couldn't go on. All she knew was that she wanted her lover wrapped around her, holding her tight.
When the alarm went off the next morning she didn't want to get up and go to work facing her again. Not after the night before; just the thought of it made her eyes flood over again. She wanted to call in sick, but knew she couldn't do that. At least she didn't have to face her after hours; she would be alone. Alone… She didn't want this… not at all.
As she turned on the water in the shower her tears started mixing with it making them invisible, making her not feel them anymore. Making the sound from the shower drown her soft sobs. As the water that drowned her sobs increased so did her cries, she soon crashed down on the floor in the shower screaming out the agony of her broken heart, much like the water crashing down around her. She didn't care that the water that was crashing down around her got colder. It didn't matter, nothing did. All she wanted was to have the pain go away, but she knew that most likely wouldn't happen anytime soon.
Slowly, on shaky legs she got up and wrapped a towel around herself to get dry, but again the tears started to fall when she realized it smelled like her. She looked into the mirror only to see herself in tears, with red eyes and grimy cheek.
She sighed, slowly managing to get herself back together before putting on makeup and putting her hair up with help of a white ribbon to a change. She then walked into the bedroom to find a white suit along with a peach top before putting it on. She slowly found a pair of matching shoes, before taking one of her guns out of the gun locker and putting it in a holster on her hip. She took one last look in the mirror in the hallway thinking that it was as good as it was gonna get before leaving and closing the door behind her.
When Calleigh came to work she concluded with that she had to wear her shades inside as her eyes were still red from crying. She sighed heavily before getting out of the car and into the building. Unfortunate she ran into Natalia in the elevator on her way up. She was wearing her shades as well.
Neither spoke it was just that awkward silence as it is when no one knows what to say. The one they both hated. Until Natalia with concerned voice asked, "Did you sleep at all last night?"
"Not that it is any of your concern anymore, but not much," said Calleigh honest, looking down towards the floor.
Natalia very slowly removed her glasses; put them in the pocket of her jacket, before turning to take another look at her ex-girlfriend. She gently let her hand slide under her chin, lifting it, before letting the other hand slide to remove her white shades. Calleigh looked into Natalia's chocolate brown eyes, tears again welling up inside her; still she couldn't help herself from bending forward and kissing Natalia's soft lips. Natalia pulled her closer letting out a moan into her mouth, making a shiver ran down Calleigh's lips, holding onto her hardly pushing her against the back of the elevator. As Natalia slowly let her lips broke free just as the door opened on their floor. Calleigh could no longer hold her tears back.
"Shhh easy, it's not the end of the world, you will find someone better," Natalia whispered, gently stroking some of her tears away.
"You just don't get it do you, I only want you," Calleigh whispered as they got out of the elevator.
Natalia didn't replay, mostly because she wanted Calleigh more than anything in the world, she just didn't know how to make it happen. She was deathly afraid of the consequences both at work and in private if people found out. Yet she loved the blonde dearly.
"Please don't do this," Calleigh whispered even lower than before.
"I have to, I don't know what else to do," said Natalia that now also have started to cry.
"I need to…" Calleigh said, running back into the elevator most likely to find safety in her firearms, while Natalia hurried to the wardrobe so no one would see her cry.
It was about four days after the break that Natalia was halfway sleeping over the lab table in DNA. In front of her were some case folders and some evidence that needed processing. Her mind and heart however wasn't in it like it normally would, as her only thought was Calleigh.
Her Calleigh, her beloved girl. Oh how she regretted that she had ended things. A silent tear ran down her cheek as she heard Valera ask, "Natalia, are you OK?"
"No, I'm not," she admitted for the first time in days.
"You wanna talk about it?" Valera offered, coming closer, looking at her friend with concerned eyes.
"Well lately I've been dating this really great person that makes me heart race and gosh I've never before been this happy," she said with a sigh.
"I've notice, but if you're happy, then where is the problem?" Valera wanted to know.
"Well I broke it off because I was afraid of what others would think and broke her heart, which was probably the most stupid thing I could have done," Natalia said.
"I would agree, Natalia, listen if you really love this person you shouldn't care what people thing because clearly you are nuts about her, whoever she is, so I say you go and try to fix it, with any luck, she still would want you," said Valera encouraging.
"I hope you are right and if anything it couldn't hurt to try," said Natalia with a sigh.
"That's the spirit," said Valera and smiled at her.
Natalia smiled back before slowly putting away some folders before going to see if she could spot Calleigh anywhere in the building.
She in the end found her where she should have been looking first firearms, bent over her laptop, looking at something. Natalia slowly walked closer and as the blonde got aware of her she locked the window, yet she didn't look up.
"Sweet…Calleigh, do you have a moment," Natalia said, feeling like a total idiot for almost saying sweetheart as she had broken up with her.
"What do you need?" Calleigh said with a sigh, still not looking up from what she was doing. What Natalia didn't see was that the blonde was doodling her name on the page she was writing.
"Well, it's just I've been thinking and I come to the fact that well I found that breaking up with you was the biggest mistake I've ever made. Is there any chance that you would be willing to take me back," said Natalia, now she was looking down with insecure eyes, nervously biting her lower lip.
This made the blonde raise her eyes, looking at her for the first time in the last few days. She looked tired, really tired, her eyes were red, her usually neat hair was rather messy and there was also sadness in her eyes. It made her feel a little bit better knowing she was not the only one that had had a crappy time the last few days. Calleigh sighed and said, "To be honest I don't know Natalia, because even if I really love you, you really hurt me and I can't let that happen again, it would just too hard."
Silent tears started to run down Natalia's cheek as she whispered, "I understand."
Calleigh looked over at the older woman that was standing in front of her crying, it was just more than she could take at the moment. Without thinking it even further she walked over, wrapped her arms around her and held her closely.
"Shhh," she whispered, gently stroking her backside.
"Just promise me you won't hurt me again," Calleigh whispered looking into her ex-lover's teary eyes.
"I promise," Natalia whispered.
"And you will be willing to take the consequences of others finding out about us?" Calleigh ask.
"I will do anything, just please take me back as I cannot function without you," Natalia pleaded.
Calleigh simply just replayed to her question by raising her chin and kissing her. Natalia deepened it just a little, before backing away, just to hide in Calleigh's chest, dragging in the essence of her. Calleigh smiled a little, nuzzling the top of Natalia's head as she continued to stroke her to calm her down.
The following weeks Natalia showed her love for Calleigh in a numerous ways, everything from flowers to little notes. Calleigh enjoyed every moment of it and showed her appreciation in thanking her beloved Natalia in various ways, but she was careful with not to do anything inappropriate in places where they could risk getting caught.
It was an early morning and the two of them were working in DNA, or rather Natalia was working, Calleigh where on the other hand standing behind her, arms resting her waist, head on her shoulder, gently kissing her neck.
"Would you stop it," Natalia said with a giggle, turning a page in her folder.
"But why, you seem to like it," said Calleigh, sucking a little deeper to leave a lovemark making Natalia let out a giggle and a moan.
"Please stop, you are distracting me and I really need to…" the rest of the sentence dissapered in a moan, just as Ryan came in and said, "If it isn't the happy couple."
Calleigh gasped as she quickly broke free from her sweetheart as she was blushing like crazy.
"Ryan, what do you mean?" Natalia asked calmly, as her hand reached back to grab for Calleigh's. Calleigh quickly let her hand slipping into Natalia's as she again came closer.
"Oh come on Nat, you don't have to play innocent, I know you two have something going, I've seen you two acting lovingly towards each other more than once," he said and smiled at them.
"Does anyone else know?" Calleigh asked, she was starting to look rather alarmed.
"I honestly don't know, but you have my blessing if that counts," he said and winked at them.
"Why thank you," said Natalia and giggled.
"Do you think Horatio knows?" Calleigh asked Natalia, afraid of an internal investigation and maybe Eric finding out.
"Would it matter if he did?" Natalia asked, raising a brow, looking at her lover, afraid she would back out.
Calleigh sighed before answering, "Of course not, the only thing that matters is that we love each other."
Tears of joy started to fall from Natalia's eyes as she bent forward to kiss her, not caring who was watching or not, and for the first time for as long as she had been with Natalia Calleigh didn't either.
Silent tears of happiness were running down Natalia's cheek as she watched Calleigh as she walked towards her up the aisle. Both were wearing white dresses and while Calleigh was wearing a stunning diadem, Natalia had white flowers in her hair.
Natalia couldn't help but smiling seeing her bride being lead towards her by her father. It had taken both Calleigh's and Natalia's parents a little getting used to them as a couple and then the fact that they wanted to get married. Both tears and angry words had been exchanged before they all came to terms with the fact that the two women did love each other dearly and therefore wanted to spend the rest of their lives together.
Calleigh was blushing slightly as she smiled back at her blushing bride waiting for her at the altar; tears were appearing in her emerald eyes as well. As she took her place beside Natalia she whispered, "You look so beautiful, just like an angel."
Natalia blushed even more saying, "No, you are the angel, gosh sweetheart I never think I've seen you this beautiful."
Calleigh blushed so her cheek got a rosy red color as she looked down with a smile. Natalia raised her chin whispering, "You're just the cutest."
The blonde was about to say something back when the minister interrupted, "Shall we start?"
Natalia looked at Calleigh that nodded, making her smile before the minister started on the ceremony.
Neither of the two ladies had gotten much of what the minister said, other than the fact that he did marry them and they were now wife and wife.
The happy couple was done with the wedding photos and was now going to meet their guest for dinner and the party that followed. Still they somehow managed to sneak away into one of the rooms at the resort the ceremony was held. Natalia pushed Calleigh down on the couch, lifted her dress just enough for it to be on the way and got on top of her. Lucky for her the split on the dress make it a bit easier. Calleigh smiled at her, her hands resting on her wife's sides.
Natalia bent down to kiss her, first very gentle, but as an eager Calleigh deepened it and started to tongue her she quickly followed. She only broke free to get out a loud moan.
Natalia smiled at her before her lips decided to mark her lover's neck, after all the wedding pictures were already take, or at least the most important ones. Calleigh practically screamed out for more, kicking her legs in pleasure, and her hands rasping on her back, so Natalia could feel it even if her wedding dress was covering most of her back. Not that she minded, she simply let out some moans into Calleigh's neck, before continuing to suck on it.
She let her hand slide down and somehow managed to get under the fabric and between her legs, determining that she in deed was very wet. Calleigh panted frantically feeling how Natalia managed to get between her panties and let her fingers slide back and forth between her clit and her entrance. Slowly it dipped inside before going back to rub on her swollen clit.
The blonder was panting more heavily now, barely managing to hold on any longer. Natalia, knowing her wife knew this and went up to pant into her ear as her rubbing became even more intense.
And with that Calleigh did the only thing she could do, she gave herself to Natalia fully, shaking hardly beneath her, screaming out, holding onto her.
As her panting was decreasing Natalia removed her hand from her wet area as she looked into her eyes, gently stroking her cheek, whispering, good girl."
"Thank you, I really needed that right now," Calleigh whispered, looking at her lover, letting her fingers wander up and down her back in a very loving way.
"I could tell, I could be wrong when I say that I think you have been randy since we parted yesterday," said Natalia as the couple had spent the night apart.
"You are not, gosh I thought I would go insane last night," Calleigh admitted blushing shyly.
"That doesn't really surprise me, and other than that any difficulties," Natalia asked, her eyes now on Calleigh's belly, showing a little bulge beneath her white dress.
"Not other than I missed falling asleep and waking up with my Nat and that I was worried the dress wouldn't fit anymore, luckily it did," said Calleigh with a little smile.
"It sure did, but you know soon we will have to tell the others," said Natalia, stroking her belly in a very loving way.
"Let it go one more month then we will, I want it to just be about us until then," said Calleigh kissing her lovingly.
"I agree, but we better get out there," said Natalia, slowly getting off her wife.
"I know," said Calleigh with a little yawn.
"Tired?" the brunette asked rather worried.
"Didn't get much sleep last night," she admitted.
"We can go to bed early if you want to," said Natalia.
"On our wedding night, not a chance, besides we can do that on our honeymoon that starts tomorrow morning," said Calleigh with a happy giggle, dragging the brunette back with her to the party, most likely it would continue all night long in one way or another. And not a single sad tear would be shed, only happy ones as they were bout overjoyed with the happiness they felt for each other and wanted to share that with the world.
Then again they always made each other happy and if there was one thing Natalia was happy about it was that she was now married to the woman she loved so dearly, since she had taken her back. Calleigh on the other hand was glad that Natalia had begged her to do so. Because if there was one thing they both knew it was that they couldn't live without each other and as they just had gotten married they would never have to.
Feedback always welcome and very much appreciated :o)