Disclaimer: I own nothing so you can't sue!

Chris was sitting in his VIP section of the plane, He loved being the host as he could do whatever he wanted, and He loved having his own "Suite" on the plane. Chef barged in while Chris was in his hot tub.

"You have a letter" Chef threw it at him "I think it's important, I couldn't read it all even after holding it to the light"

"Fan mail?" Chris laughed "I bet it's from some crazy fan! Shred it with the rest"

"I'm telling you its important" Chef told him "It came in a big envelope which means it's important or a bomb!"

"Fine, Gimmie it" Chris grabbed the envelope and opened it

Dear Chris,

I'm not sure if you remember me or not because you were drunk that night, But I wanted to let you know that I don't appreciate you harming all those poor Children on your show let alone your son, Yes I said it, Your son, I think you should know that I don't appreciate you tossing him out of the plane, I also decided that since he's in your care now you can keep him as it may do you both some good, I decided to join the circus and he's freaky enough the way it is! I don't want him to hang out with Circus folk, Don't believe me he's your son? Well I worked the Gemmy awards backstage and I took the glass of water you were drinking and I got a DNA test which proves that you are the father! You'll also find a copy of that enclosed in this envelope, What should have been the real eye opener for you thought was the last name, He does have your last name which he used to fill out the form to join the show, Though I'm doubting you read that since you don't seem to care and he's too stupid to figure it out, The man who was his stepdad walked out on us because he didn't support my dream of joining the circus, Oh well it doesn't matter because you're going to raise him now. So enjoy your new Problem and Son.


I hate you for not paying child support and becoming a millionaire while I pretty much had nothing except a bean stalk which you cannot climb to meet giants who have golden eggs.


"So, Is it important?" Chef asked

"Oh great!" Chris yelled "I have a son, Who I'm stuck with and he's on my show!" Chef laughed

"Who is it?" Chef asked

"Ezekiel" Chris cried "Why me!"

"I guess you should go tell him" Chef laughed "Go on! Go tell him Daddy's here!"

"Shut up!" Chris whined as he went to go find Ezekiel

"Look on the Brightside!" Chef laughed "You know your baby boy is hiding with the cargo!"