FANDOM: Fullmetal Alchemist
SUMMARY: "You make me feel like a teenager again," he said, almost wistfully. Riza blinked back the horror that washed over her as she pictured the Elric brothers, who were no doubt wreaking havoc somewhere in Amestris. "Sir?"
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist.
DEDICATED TO: Hayaaateuh, from Youtube, who is awesome oh-so-kindly agreed to make a Royai AMV when I asked her to. Check it out! It's called "Secrets".
Riza Hawkeye did not appreciate being woken up to the sound of the phone ringing at one in the morning. She especially didn't appreciate having to drive to a bar on the other side of the city to pick up her commanding officer.
She slammed the car door with a little more force than usual, and opened the door to the bar, her nostrils flaring distastefully at the stench of alcohol.
The bartender, who looked even more tired that she felt, looked at her and gave an apologetic shrug.
"Hello, Bernhard," she sighed.
"Morning, Miss Hawkeye. He," he pointed at the woeful lump of the colonel at the end of the counter, "is all yours."
Riza set her lips into a tight, irritated line, and marched over to him in the brisk, rhythmic march that had been drilled into her during her time as a soldier. "Sir."
The lump made no sign of movement.
She shook his shoulder impatiently. "Sir, get up."
A coal-colored eye peeked at her blearily. "Izzat you, Riza?"
She made no move to censure him for the use of her first name. He was drunk, after all.
"Come on, sir. It's about time you got home."
Roy took one last swig at the already-empty glass next to him, and teetered up.
Riza gave Bernard the Bartender a nod in farewell, and looped an arm around the colonel's waist to steady him before he broke the table he looked like he would walk into.
She all but dragged him to the car and dumped him into the passenger seat.
The arm that he had around her shoulders tightened, causing her to jam her head into the car.
At her yelp of pain, Roy pulled her even closer, muttering obscure obscenities.
"You stink, sir," she said bluntly, and somehow succeeded in twisting out of his grip before she got further injured.
When she was all set to drive, Roy leaned his head against the window and looked at the passing streetlights.
"You make me feel like a teenager again," he said, almost wistfully.
Riza blinked back the horror that washed over her as she pictured the Elric brothers, who were no doubt wreaking havoc somewhere in Amestris. "Sir?"
"Not a teenager like Fullmetal. A cool teenager, like me."
She sighed irritably, but decided that it would be easier to put up with his drunken antics than to have him break into song, like he had on one occasion.
"You were much worse than him, sir."
He shook his head unsteadily. "Was not. I was cool."
She pursed her lips. "I didn't see you much, but whenever I did, you were always out drinking with some friends at town."
"Nuh-uh!" This time, he seemed to shake his entire body in denial. "Not always. Just at night on weekends."
Riza changed the subject before he knocked over the rearview mirror with his flailing. "How do I remind you of your teenage years, sir?"
'This better be appropriate.'
"Lotsa ways," he slurred. "You make me feel responsible."
She almost snorted at that. "You were never responsible, sir. I distinctly remember having to pick you up from the bar, much like I'm doing now."
Roy didn't seem to hear her, and rambled on. "I'd have to protect you from boys. Remember Harry?"
"Of course, sir," she lied.
He frowned. "You're lying. You never talked to him. He was the doctor's son. He showed up on Valentine's Day once with flowers. I had to threaten him to leave you alone."
"No one ever tried to give me anything on Valentine's Day, sir."
"That's because I'd make sure they wouldn't! You never knew, though, since I figured I had to keep it a secret from you or else you'd be mad about butting in your life."
She didn't know whether she should be angry or amused. "I'm perfectly capable of protecting myself, sir."
"That Barry the Chopper looks at you like a piece of meat."
"He was an insane butcher, sir. And I shot him. We're here, sir."
He went on, blissfully unaware. "And then there's how I can't touch you."
Riza froze in the middle of unbuckling her seat belt.
"See, I have to stay away from you because of those stupid regulations that no one ever follows except for you."
'It's just the alcohol talking, Riza.'
"And the first day I stepped into your house, your dad told me that you were absolutely off-limits, and that I shouldn't even think about it."
She had a hard time imagining her father saying that.
"And of course, I never knew what he was talking about since he was already starting to look a bit freaky then and he forgot to shave that day, but then you walked in through the door holding two cups of tea, and I just thought –"
'He won't even remember he said this tomorrow morning.'
"Speaking of tea, you still drink it every morning. I remember how it was always citron tea in the morning with breakfast, then Darjeeling, and then you'd switch to Earl Gray for the afternoon. But you'd never drink tea after six, because you always went to bed early. You still drink Darjeeling and Earl Gray at work. Do you still just eat bread and jam for breakfast?"
By then, Riza had regained her mobility again, and was helping Roy out of the car.
"If you made me breakfast again, would you make me an egg-white omelet for once? Instead of adding the yolk. But you said it was stupid to waste the yolk, so I had to deal with it."
"Come on, sir."
She knew where his apartment was by now. This wasn't the first time Riza had to take her superior officer home when he was in a drunken stupor.
Fishing the key out of Roy's pocket, she unlocked the door and nudged it open with her shoulder, stumbling when he suddenly leaned all of his weight against her.
"Do you still like fudge, Riza?"
She grunted in response, concentrating on getting him to his bedroom.
"I bought some, but you like it better than I do."
Roy suddenly careened to the left as they passed by the kitchen counter, and Riza lost her balance. They both fell against the table, and she winced as she felt her hip connect to the corner.
He seemed to be groping around for something, and he suddenly flourished it, almost whacking her in the nose. "Take it, Riza."
It was a small box of fudge, wrapped prettily in a white box with a decorative, gold ribbon.
"Take it, Riza."
"Are you sure, Mr. Mustang? It looks expensive…"
"Take it! Mrs. Hendrickson gave me two boxes—one for me, and one for you. She said it was an early Christmas present."
She took the box, opening it and inhaling a whiff of chocolate. She picked up a piece and took a bite.
Roy was watching her with a strange little smile on his face. "Do you like it?"
Riza let a small smile don her face. "Fudge is my favorite food."
"Then do you want mine?"
He held out the box, waiting for her to accept.
"Don't you want it, Mr. Mustang?"
He only pushed it closer. "I'm sure I'll live. Go on, take it! Live a little!"
When she made no move taking it, he sighed and thrust it into her arms.
"You're growing up too fast for your own good, Riza."
She snorted. "I have to act grown-up for the both of us, Mr. Mustang."
Riza blinked, and pushed the memory to the back of her mind. "I'm sure I'll live, Mr. Mustang."
She'd tried to push it to the back of her mind, anyway.
She set the box firmly on the table, and dragged him to his bed. "You need your sleep for tomorrow, sir. I expect to see you at work tomorrow, hangover or no hangover."
When Roy dropped to the bed, snoring, she left his keys on the kitchen counter and left his apartment, being sure to lock the door as she did so.
"You're awfully grumpy today, sir."
Roy glared at his subordinates, who were gleefully taking advantage of his hangover and making as many loud noises as possible.
He flicked his gaze over to the one subordinate who was actually working.
Riza was calmly scanning the form in front of her, and the picture reminded him of the days when he used to glance out the window during lessons with her father. She'd be sitting under the tree in their yard, looking at her book with the same concentrated pout that she was wearing now.
She looked up, and as she raised an eyebrow to warn him to get back to work, he had to wonder if she'd developed a sixth sense over the years.
During their break, they all went their separate ways. Breda went to the sandwich shop down the street, Havoc went God-knows-where to smoke a cigarette, Fury went of… somewhere, Roy went to chat to one of his many informants, and Riza would take Black Hayate out for a walk.
This particular day, Roy made a change of plans and joined Riza for her daily walk.
"You were the one who took me home last night, right, Lieutenant?"
"Yes, sir," she answered crisply, watching her dog prance around gleefully.
"Well, thank you as always."
"It's not like I had a choice, sir."
Roy sighed at her acidic humor. "Did I say anything weird this time?"
'He won't remember he said this tomorrow morning.'
"No, sir," she lied smoothly. "But you did sing an interesting rendition of–"
"Spare me the details, Lieutenant," he moaned.
He suddenly perked up when they walked by a candy store. "Do you still like fudge, Lieutenant?"
Riza swallowed the lump that was threatening to form at the back of her throat. "Excuse me, sir?"
He laughed and pushed her inside. "I bought some from this store, but I ate it this morning. I'll buy you some."
"It looks expensive, sir."
Roy waved it off. "It's worth it, trust me."
He selected a box, despite her protests, and opened for her after they'd paid for it and walked out of the store.
"Take it, Lieutenant."
She stared at him, holding out the open box, and the wave of memories suddenly hit her.
He sighed and thrust it into her arms. "Live a little, Lieutenant."
She selected a piece. It melted in her mouth, and she could feel the corners of her lips lifting.
He watched her with the same, strange little smile.
And she couldn't help it.
"Thank you, Mr. Mustang."
A/N: OHMYGAWD, I actually like this piece for once. Let's just hope that'll last for more than two seconds after I put this up.
But gah. I need to stop writing romance fics. They're getting to my mind. This was supposed to be crack with a bit of Royai, but nooo, it's just pure fluff because I've been working on SiG. Great.