Oh, I won't ask for much this Christmas
I won't even wish for snow
And I'm just gonna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe.
'Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding onto me so tight
What more can I do?
Baby all I want for Christmas is you.
All I Want for Christmas, Carey and Afanaseiff 1994
Disclaimer:I do not own Twilight or any of the characters from the Saga. Stephenie Meyer is the owner of Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This work, and the original ideas presented therein, is the sole property of this author.
This fandom has given me many gifts, but first among them are the friends I've made here. Like swimom7. She started out as a reader, who turned into an occasional pen pal, who became an online buddy and fellow writer, and who has become one of my real life best friends. This story is my Christmas gift to her, but it is also for each and every one of you who read All That Jazz. You all took a chance on me by reading this story and I can't tell you how much it means to me. I hope you enjoy a little early Jazzward lemon … my Christmas gift to you. This outtake actually takes place a bit in the future from where we are now in ATJ, just after Alice sets sail for Paris.
This was my time. Alone in Esme and Carlisle's solarium with my baby grand. The windows were frosted over, hinting at the cold winter wind blustering just outside. Inside, the whole house was filled with the smells of cinnamon, sugar, and revelry. It was Esme's annual Christmas party, and I had just proposed to the woman of my dreams.
I smiled as my fingers moved over the keys. She had looked so lovely in her red, crushed-velvet gown, so much more revealing than she ever would have dared last year at this time. The vibrant color had highlighted the blush of color on her cheeks and lips.
She'd been so surprised when I pulled out the small box after all of the other presents were opened. I pulled her over in front of the large Christmas tree as a hush fell over the room. Then I got down on one knee in front of her.
It was perfect. Because she had said yes. She wanted me for the rest of our lives. My heart was lighter than air, and it came through in the music that poured from my piano.
How long would we wait? A year … two? It didn't matter anymore because she'd said yes. She was going to be mine.
A shiver of anticipation ran down my back as the music began to change, swinging and syncopating in a sultry beat. I was playing jazz because that was Bella to me: enigmatic, alluring, and constantly full of surprises. I imagined her dancing into the room, her body swaying gently to the music. And then … she was there. Like a flickering flame bursting to life next to the piano, she seemed to appear out of nowhere, her rose-colored lips pursed and smiling as she hummed along with my music.
Her voice, low and dancing through the dimly lit room, startled me. She moved around the piano, and I felt her presence behind me, the warmth of her body radiating from her in waves that I could feel against my back. My fingers froze atop the keys as I thought of how close she must be to me. I wanted to turn around and pull her to me, but her fingers in my hair stopped me.
"Keep playing," she purred. "I like the music."
I instantly picked up where I'd left off, eager to do anything that would keep her body close to mine and her fingers in my hair. At first, her touch was gentle; I barely felt her moving through the strands, but the hint of her contact was enough to make me shiver. As the music swelled, her touch grew bolder and her hands moved down from my hair, brushing lightly against my ears, until she reached my neck. Slowly, she kneaded the tightly wound muscles at the base of my neck, her warm fingers slipping underneath my loosened collar and massaging my shoulders.
"Bella," I groaned as her hands continued to move against me. "So good."
My voice was tight with desire as her fingers dipped lower beneath my shirt, trailing over my chest and back up around my neck. She was everywhere and yet she wasn't where I wanted her. God, the woman drove me mad. I felt her hot breath next to my ear and the soft weight of her breasts pressing against my back as she leaned against me.
"Yes," she whispered, "it is good, isn't it?"
Her words ignited a fire within me. It was no secret that I wanted more, always more, from her. But I was content to wait, knowing it was what she wanted and what was best. But her words, the very tone of her voice, set my senses burning. Could it be that she wanted more as well?
"I want so much more," she murmured as though reading my thoughts.
Her tongue darted out, just grazing the tip of my earlobe. I could no longer make my fingers produce music as her tongue traced the inside shell of my ear and she planted a kiss just behind. I gasped as she exhaled against my wet, oversensitive skin. Her fingers moved from my skin to my shirt, beginning to loosen it further.
Closing my eyes, I leaned my head back against her shoulder and tried to win the war my mind was having with itself: to stop her or to let her continue. She undid the third button and then trailed her fingernails up my chest, over my nipples, making me cry out and turn my head toward her. Her neck was exposed to me, and without thinking, I opened my mouth and kissed the exposed flesh, pulling and sucking it into my mouth until she groaned.
I finally grabbed her hand and pulled her to my side, readying myself up to slow her down. I felt sure she could not know what she was doing to me. She was simply overwrought with the excitement of our engagement, and I needed to be sensible for both of us. However, instead of sitting beside me on the bench, she came around in front of me, facing me before she sat in my lap. Her legs straddled me as she lowered herself onto my straining arousal. I could feel her warmth pressed against my hardness, and I moaned in a mixture of pleasure and agony as she settled herself against me.
She wrapped her arms around me, her hands once again in my hair, and looked directly into my eyes. I saw her through a haze of lust, and she smiled as though she knew exactly what I was thinking about.
"I want this, Edward," she said clearly. "Let yourself go and love me."
She moved gently against me, once and then again. Her movements were deliberate, and she smiled widely when I cried out and gripped her hips hard in my hands. I had no power left to resist her. She was everything I wanted and needed, and she was offering herself to me. Surely, I couldn't deny her wants.
I guided the small movements of her hips with one hand, my own body moving naturally with her. My other hand reached up and wound in her hair, pulling her face roughly down to mine where I captured her lips with mine. I could not even be gentle when I kissed her, immediately seizing her bottom lip with my teeth and pulling it into my mouth. I whimpered as she bucked against me, her hands knotting painfully in my hair as she took my tongue into her mouth and deepened our kiss.
"God, Bella, I want this so much," I gasped when we broke apart, her lips moving along my jaw to my neck where she licked and sucked my sensitive skin. "I want you so much."
"Then take me Edward," she whispered, her lips inches from my ear. "I'm yours."
I forgot that we were in her family's house. I forgot that there were dozens of people probably just outside the door. I bloody well forgot my name. A sound close to a growl escaped my lips as I picked her up, knocking over the piano bench as I stood.
"Mine," murmured, kissing her lips, her neck, her chest. "Always."
I laid her down on the chaise lounge and knelt beside her, her arms still my neck. She threw her head back and allowed me to kiss along her neck and down her shoulders. As I followed the curve of her neckline, her breathing increased. I pressed my tongue against her overheated flesh, and she moaned loudly.
"More," she cried, her fingers reaching for her dress to pull it out of the way.
She sat up, allowing me access to the back of her dress, and I didn't think or worry any longer. I wanted this and she did too. I undid the buttons and roughly moved the dress out of my way so that I could finally see the swell of her breasts, which I had dreamed about so often. The soft flesh was whiter than I imagined, and flushed with desire as my trembling fingers grazed her skin.
"So soft," I whispered, lowering my head and running my nose against her skin.
"Kiss me," she sighed.
I knew exactly where and how she wished to be kissed. My hands were already moving behind her and loosening the fastenings of her undergarment. I pulled it away hurriedly, and she was exposed. Her flesh filled my mouth, my tongue swirling against her, tasting her. Her fingers moved to my shirt, undoing the last of the buttons and pulling hard at the fabric until my upper body was exposed.
"Please," she cried. "I need to feel you."
Her fingernails dug into my shoulders, pulling me closer to her. As the skin of our chests touched, tiny explosions of electricity went off along my skin. I snaked my hand along the line of her body, pushing her dress down and away, and leaving her exposed on the bench. She writhed beneath me, her hips rising up to meet my hand as it traveled up and down her legs. I brushed the meeting of her thighs, still covered in silk, and we both moaned.
With shaky hands, I reached the waistband of her underwear and slipped my fingers beneath, tugging them down. She placed her hands over top of mine and I thought perhaps she would stop me. Instead, she pushed my hands faster, lifting her hips up to help me pull the silken fabric down her thighs and finally free of her legs.
I pulled back, wanting to look at her. Her chest heaved as my fingertips grazed the tips of her breast and trailed down her stomach. I didn't know where to touch first. I looked up at her face, her eyes deep and dark with desire. She rolled slightly to the side and then sat up in front of me, reaching out for me. When her sure fingers found my belt, I groaned and let my head fall against her shoulder. Soon, she had pushed my pants and under things down, and I needed only to step out of them.
As I did, I watched her look at me for the first time. Her eyes seemed to travel over me and come to rest on my arousal. Her tongue darted out, making me swallow hard. The thought of her tongue … her mouth. She held out her hand to me, inviting me to join her on the bench. I thought certain it would be too small for us, but when I settled myself beside her, I found that it fit us perfectly.
The heat of her naked body beside me set my blood racing. I could not stop myself from moving myself against her, feeling the friction of her skin against my overheated and needy sex. She looked me in the eye and nodded, pulling my body over her so that I knelt between her legs. A sudden worry seized me as I realized I had no idea what to do; I only had the overwhelming urge to feel her surround me.
She pulled me down and warmth encircled me. My arms were around her and she reached up and put her hands on my back. Her hips moved with me, encouraging my movements. The heat of her, the feel of her moving with me was overwhelming. Soon, I began moving rhythmically, and she moved with me. I could feel the heat and need building within me; I was so close to the edge. Bella's hand pressed down on my back, spurring me harder against her.
"Oh, yes!" her voice a breathy moan in my ear. "More."
I grunted with effort, my body pumping against her harder and faster. My release was coming; it wouldn't be long. I felt her breath on my neck, and as her hips met mine again, she closed her lips on my neck and bit down with her teeth, sending me spiraling over the edge, crying out her name hoarsely.
I awoke panting and sweaty in my own bed, Bella's name on my lips as my heart hammered in my chest. It was a dream. Another lurid and all too graphic dream.
The room was stifling in the late August heat, but I shivered beneath the now damp and soiled covers. I ran my left hand over my sweaty face and shook my head to clear it of the remnants of my dream. As I got up, gathering my sheets and blankets together for the wash and heading quietly to the bathroom, I chastised myself for the wanton thoughts that had come unbidden in the night.
I laughed silently. Unbidden? Perhaps not entirely unbidden. Ever since I'd returned from the trip to New York with Bella and her family, I had been having more and more difficulty controlling my desire for her. I wanted things I didn't understand, things I ought to have been ashamed for wanting. And yet, it felt natural to desire these things with Bella.
I smiled as I remembered the innocent beginning of my dream. Bella had accepted my proposal of marriage. This was the one desire that had followed me through my days and haunted me in the night. I was finding it increasingly difficult to ignore my desperate need for Bella to share my name.
"You need a ring for that," I said sleepily to myself as I redressed for bed.
A ring. And a savings … neither of which were in my possession at the moment. The savings I wasn't as concerned about as I once was. I finally had broken down and discussed my concerns with Father, and he told me of a trust he and Mother had set up in my name. It was a sizable sum and would be mine when I got married or when I graduated from Law School, whichever came first. Father seemed certain the former would come before the latter, and I hadn't been able to argue with him.
The ring however was an interesting question, one that I had put much thought into. I knew Bella well enough to know what she would appreciate most. I just had to go about obtaining it. The dream had made up my mind for me, and I vowed as I made up my bed to go the next day and discuss plans with Eleazar.
The time had come to get a ring for my Bella. I would need to start now if I wanted her to wear it by Christmas.
A/N: It's intentionally vague. Edward is a blushing virgin, after all. He doesn't know what he's imagining really, just that he wants something. I hope you enjoyed. ;) Merry Christmas just a little bit early, my lovelies. And thank you ALL for all you've given me throughout this past year. Getting to know each and every one of you has been so wonderful! *mwah* Jazzward wants to meet you under the mistletoe! ;) ~Jen