"I don't intend on falling in love," she says,

as she he watching him fall

a little bit more

in love with her.

And she doesn't want to feel

(she never wants to feel,

she doesn't want to remember how to be

human.)

that foreign feeling of guilt

when she sees the barely masked pain in his eyes,

because she thought she'd stopped

feeling such silly emotions

a long, long time ago

and since when do his sad grey eyes

make her heart ache?

"Oh, you don't?" he says,

hiding the heaviness in his eyes,

his voice vibrating in her ears

and maybe a little bit in

her heart.

...

She's the type that incessantly plans

everything.

Every single aspect of her life must be

planned for && mapped out

because if she doesn't have control

what does she have?

But that boy with those grey eyes

- Lorcan -

has always been the

unplanned factor in everything.

And she can't decide if she loves it or hates it.

Because he makes her take risks and

do crazystupid things

and he makes her

live.

...

He kisses her first,

and suddenly all her plans just...

evaporate.

(she said she'd never fall in love...)

she whispers

"No... you can't..."

and she pulls away

because she's didn't plan on this

and he deserves so much

better

than her anyways.

She waits, for his eyes to say

well why the hell not

and for him demand that she love him too.

...

"Oh my god, Molly, get a fucking clue.

I don't want better than you."

...

He tells her that it doesn't matter if

she intended to fall in love,

she'll always fall

head first,

head over heels anyways.

(Oh, god, she hates it when he's right.)

...

She still says he only thinks

he loves her,

but somehow she knows he wouldn't still be here

if he didn't actually love her.

Because loving her was always a desperate affair.

But maybe she's just worth it,

is what he always says.


HEY I DID NOT DIE JUST RETURNED. I AM SORRY FOR BEING GONE SO LONG I STILL LOVE YOU DO LOVE MEEE? Okay, this Molly/Lorcan if you couldn't tell and it's kinda short BUT I LIKE IT.

OKAY XOXO I WILL UPDATE SOON THIS TIME,

DES