It's back, I'm back, and if you didn't know I was gone to begin with, well, all the better. New name, same fuckery. Let's do this, shall we?

As always, I don't own them, I just made them a little more awesome.


Six o' clock, time to get ready for my shift, dressed to kill and all that. Putting on my favorite distressed denim short-shorts, paired with a chocolate-colored tank with a lace-up bust, and tanned thigh-high moccasin boots, I knew the tips would be alright tonight. Instead of brushing my hair, I finger-combed though the tangles so it wouldn't frizz, running my fingers through the chestnut locks that hung almost to my waist. I'd added highlights since my mousier days, caramel and blonde, adding some definition to my formerly boring mop. Some smoky eye-shadow, a couple coats of mascara, and a swipe of lip gloss, and the look was complete.

"Bella Swan, I do believe you are quite the hottie," I complemented my reflection. "Showtime," I finished with a whisper to the face staring back at me.


I caved. Peter and Charlotte had been belly-achin' for me to go out on the town with them since we arrived at their hacienda at the edge of town. Seriously, what the fuck kind of business do vampires have settling in Phoenix? But they don't mind having to hide out in the shadows; that's where their hunting is best anyway. The scum of humanity have always been plentiful at the midnight hour. At least their place is far enough away from civilization that fresh air was still an option, should we want to step outside and enjoy the sun. And the mountains of Flagstaff weren't too far away for me to take care of my feeding needs, so it all worked out. I was proud of myself for managing to maintain my vegetarian lifestyle; my control had never been better.

My lifelong friends had generously allowed me to tag along with them for the last eighteen months. I wasn't sure how much longer they were going to put up with me, but I couldn't bring myself to go back to the family just yet. I knew Alice wouldn't be there, having settled into her new life in Paris, but the looks of pity on their faces, let alone in their emotions, were still too fresh in my mind.

"Jesus tits numbnuts, you still moping around? Fuck, you need to get laid." Peter smirked at me as he walked into my room. "You ready to go?"

Sigh. "Yes, asshole, let's get this night over with. Where are we going again?"

"Fuck if I know. Out. Wherever's playing a good tune that will allow my sweet wife to rub all over me on the dance floor. Maybe we'll find someone who'll rub up on you too," he said, giving me a trademark Peter Whitlock shit-eating grin.

We all piled into Peter's Tahoe and headed into downtown Phoenix. It was a nice night, so we found a central place to park and decided to walk. We bypassed various eating establishments, bars, and clubs. I was glad we bypassed the clubs; I knew Char was up for dancin' but those places ooze with lust. I'll pass.

After a bit, we came across a place that was playing some Skynyrd. Ahh, 'Sweet Home Alabama'. Now we're talking.

"Sassafrass Junction?" Char looked at the neon sign over the doorway. "What do you think guys? This place could be fun."

Peter put his arm around Charlotte and kissed her on the forehead. "Baby, this is exactly what we were looking for, let's do it." Peter met my eyes and jerked his head, toward the direction of the door. I saw a glimmer of something in his eyes, which worried me a little, but I followed them inside.

We found a booth off in a corner not too far from the dance floor. Before long, a waitress wearing a halter top and skin-clinging pair of jeans came to take our drink orders. Keeping up with appearances, Peter and I ordered beers, Char ordered a Cosmo. "What?" she asked defensively, "They look cute."

AC/DC started to blare over the speakers, You Shook Me.

"Baby, I do believe they are playing our song. Let's go dance," Peter said, taking Charlotte's hand and leading her to the dance floor.

I resumed wallowing in my misery. At the start of the next song, a commotion at the bar caught my attention. Five ladies, one of which I recognized as our server, had hopped up on the counter and began dancing to the song, sort of like them gals in that Coyote Ugly movie from a few years back. They were shimmying and gyrating against each other, tossing their hair around. Huh, this place could be entertaining after all, I thought to myself with a grin.

My eyes landed on the gal on the far right. She looked familiar. Real familiar. For the first time, I doubted my infallible vampire eyesight, because there was no way that was her. For starters, she'd be way too shy, not to mention too clumsy, to be doing what that gal was doing there.

Suddenly a drunk grabbed a hold of her boot at her mid-calf, causing her to lose balance for a moment. She recovered, then leaned down into the drunk's face and proceeded to give him an earful. My jaw dropped. Looks could be deceiving, but there was no mistaking that voice. Bella Swan. The meek little girl my family had left years ago now appeared to be a sassy little vixen with the mouth of a sailor. I found this a little more intriguing than I'd have cared to admit, but I couldn't take my eyes off of her.

Still slim, she had gained some womanly curves in all the right places, what with that naughty lace-up tank and them cute little shorty-shorts. And those boots? Mmph. I stopped that train of thought and shook my head. What was I thinking?

"See something you like?" Peter chuckled, slapping me on the back. Bastard, of course he knew. I chose to ignore him and continued watching Bella, who was now dancing rather suggestively with one of the other girls. I reckoned she must've kicked the whole shyness thing, seeing how the other gal was rubbing on her, and no trademark blush was to be seen on Bella's face.

The drunk she'd chewed out had continued leering and catcalling at her, which she ignored until he suddenly made a grab for her again, successfully knocking her off balance. Ok, so not everything had changed. I saw her topple forward off the bar, and before I knew it, I had her in my arms, still facing the floor, having caught her before she'd fully connected with linoleum.

She stiffened and then slowly tried to right herself. Her eyes connected with mine and grew wide.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me."

A/N: To my new readers, welcome, I hope you like what you've seen so far. To previous SJ readers, please be patient because I'm cleaning up the first 15 or so chapters I'd written before I was blessed to gain Mynxi's beta mastery. It'll all be back soon!