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AN: Just a brief one-shot regarding my speculation about Booth's thoughts regarding the events of the last episode; I had to do something to speculate about how we still have the potential for a relationship after a moment like that.
It might suck- and HH REALLY needs therapy if he thinks that this is SATISFYING the fans; at this point the only thing that will really 'satisfy' me is if the relationship with Hannah ends with a storyline where Booth has to pick whether Hannan or Brennan lives or dies and he chooses Brennan-, but you need to note one thing; Booth told Brennan that he was with someone else, and appeared to agree that they'd 'missed their chance', but not only did he never agree with her comment about missing their moment, but he never said that he didn't feel that way about her any more
Not the Consolation Prize
"I'm with someone now... and she's not a consolation prize."
Why the Hell did I say that?
Yeah, she's not a consolation prize, but she's not the prize, either!
No matter how much I... care... about Hannah, there's always that small part of wishing her hair was a few shades darker, her eyes that bit bluer, her tone that bit more 'squinty'...
God forgive me, but...
If I try for... that... how can I know she won't back out on me again?
It took us over six months apart to get back to some degree of normality after that mess caused by Sweets's book; what if we... try something... and then she freaks out again?
When Bones gets emotional, she can... get impulsive; how do I know she won't do this just to show that she can and then back off all over again with some 'squint stuff' about emotions and neural impulses and all that crap?
I tried to ask her for more once, and didn't get anywhere; we had our moment, and that's that.
I'm happy now.
I'm with someone who I know won't hurt me, someone who won't back out when things get emotionally intense, someone who won't break my heart because she doesn't trust that I know what I want...
It's what I deserve...
It's what I need.
Maybe eventually I'll convince myself that that's all I need.