"What happens after this?" Sam asked shakily still reeling from what he just saw.

"Your brother says yes to Lucifer without a moment's hesitation. Michael promises your father to bring your mother back if your dad will be his vessel. There's a prize fight, your father loses, and well the world as we know it ends."

Sam ran a hand through his hair, turned away from his guardian, and took a deep breath. This couldn't be what would happen to his brother. No. This was some angel trick, trying to convince Sam that everything was wonderful the way it is, that there is no reason to hate his life. They did this all of the time. Whenever they wanted he or Dean to do what they wanted, they took them on a reality bending trip to convince them that they were meant to be what their destinies foretold.

Sam turned around and sighed. "So you show me this bull shit, so what? I think 'oh thank God, I'm still alive, and I'm destined to allow myself to be rode by the devil himself like a prize winning horse.'" Her placid face made Sam's frustration level raised ten notches, why were all of these dick angels so okay with screwing with his life, with Dean's life?

"Sam…" She started and put a hand on his arm. He shrugged it off and moved away from her.

"If you are my guardian, shouldn't you be helping me to avoid Lucifer, and the whole nine? Shouldn't you be trying to fix what IS and not show me what COULD HAVE? And what about Dean? If you guys are supposed to help, where in the hell has his been? God knows he could have used a little help when he was in Hell."

His guardian looked sad at the mention of Dean's time in Hell. She looked away from him and then back. "His guardian went with him." She paused to regain some of her footing. "His guardian was the first and only to go with a charge into Hell. She went, she did what she could to protect him, but the other angels were stronger." The Guardian visibly swallowed. "She came back a lot like Dean. She came back mutilated, scared and sad. But, she like Dean, held out for as long as she could. She kept her light glowing as brightly and as intensely as she could for as long as she could. And that light saved your brother. Castiel and the others saw her dying light and that was how they found your brother."

Sam's anger melted a little under the explanation. "Guardians have very limited power. And this.." She gestured to the scene before her, "This is the limit of my power. I can show you what could have been, I can lead your brother back to you when you're sad and scared, I can help you with little things, but I can't change the big things, I can't make the angels leave you guys alone, I can't take the demon blood out of your body, but I can make sure that you try to do good with the curse that is in you.

Sam…this is the only other outcome. I just want you to see that there are good things in your life. I want you to remember that you are important for something other than being Lucifer's meat suit. Sam Winchester, you have changed lives, you have made your brother a better man, you've saved lives, you helped so many. I just want you to remember that." She stepped a little closer. "I will do what my sister did. I will follow you into hell and I will shine as brightly as I possibly can to help your brother, angels, Bobby, anyone get you back out. I just don't want for one second for you to wish that you were dead. There are few men in the world that can inspire the devotion of a Guardian, and you Sam Winchester, and your brother, you two are men that every guardian in the world would follow into hell and protect the best we know how. Sam, it may not be a wonderful perfect life, but it's the life you have."

She stepped a little closer and wiped away a tear that Sam hadn't realized was streaming down his face. "Sam, everything isn't your fault. You made some bad choices, but that was because you were trying to do the right thing. I don't ever want have to be recalled because you have killed yourself, you are too important to the world too important to a lot of people….people that have nothing to do with the struggle with heaven and hell."

Sam nodded. "Okay."

She nodded and the next moment he was back in his bed and Dean was standing by the window, hand in his hair and phone to his ear. "Bobby, I don't know where he is. I'm scared. He…he's been sad lately….I think….I think…no, I don't think he said yes…but I'm afraid that he might find a way to permanently not be his vessel….yeah…death…something….Sam's not stupid….Bobby…I can't…" Something made Dean stop and he turned and saw Sam on the bed, and his eyes relaxed. "Bobby, he's right here. I found him." And he turned the phone off.

"Where in the hell have you been?" Dean asked worry and relief mixing in his voice.

"My guardian angel thought I needed an "It's a Wonderful Life" experience."

Dean gave a small disbelieving sound, "Only in our world is that an acceptable answer."

Sam smiled and nodded. Dean sat on his bed, feet planted firmly on the floor, his elbows on his knees, and his hands scrubbing at his face. "We have to inform these angel dicks that they need to leave notes for whoever is left out of the acid trip." They both sat and starred at each other for a moment.

"Wanna talk about the trip?"

"Not right now." Sam answered with a laugh.

"Understand." Dean said and started to get cuddled up in the blankets.


"Yeah Sammy?"

"Can we go to Bobby's tomorrow?"

"Yeah, sure."


"What Sam?"

"Merry Christmas."

"You too Sammy. You too."