This isn't the best and I hope you guys enjoy it. No doubt there will be more.


Way's to annoy Shawn Michaels

1. Imply that he and Hunter had a gay sexual relationship

2. Don't talk fast; it annoys the hell out of him.

3. tell him that "Wal-Mart Sucks".

4. When in Wal-Mart, don't put anti-theft stickers under his cart that has been positively charged. It will not end well.

5. Don't sew them into his pants, either.

6. Never tell him to find a website. It is unfortunate because he does not even know how to turn on a computer. (Even if there is an 'on-off' button)

the punch line to a long joke, but assure him that it was a "real hoot".

8. Staple the RAW script in the middle of the page.

9. Look right into the Shawn's sunglasses and use the lens as a mirror while you pick your nose.

10. Cut holes into the backside of his in-ring chaps.

11. Tell him that even though he is from Texas, not everything is bigger there. (For extra measure, don't look down at his lower front.)

12. Don't tell him that the Dallas Cowboy's suck. (Even if they do and have no idea what the 'End Zone' looks like.)

13. When driving, don't keep your windshield wipers on during all kinds of weather and tell him that you are doing so to keep them "tuned up".

14. Don't put a helmet on him and tell him he must keep it on for astronaut training for he is not an astronaut and never will be.

15. Don't make beeping noises when he backs up.

16. When he is watching a hunting show or a NASCAR race, don't change the channel 5 minutes before the end of the show.

17. More importantly, don't touch the remote in his presence.

18. Actually, don't sit with him to watch television. Ever.

19. When traveling, don't put 'X-BURIED TREASURE' on random areas of his road maps.

20. Don't light road flares for candles on a cake. He is not that much of a redneck.

21. Don't call him a redneck.

22. Don't insinuate that he is even a redneck for he will tell you that his neck is not red.

23. Never explain the meaning of the term redneck.

24. He will not understand it anyway, even if he is.

25. Don't lick the filling out of the Oreos and put them back in the tray.

26. Never touch Shawn's Oreos in the first place.

27. Don't try to push the envelope too far by saying Criss Angel is asking Hunter out on a date and he was wondering if they could all have a threesome. (See number one)

28. After he says something, don't reply with "that's what you think". If you do it constantly after everything he says, he will not hesitate to bring out the shot gun.

29. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment. He can't stand it and you'll keep him in suspense.

30. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

31. Don't do it during a hunting show and insist it's all the algae in the water.

32. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climatic parts of rental movies. He loves his action movies and he is not old. He works out on the Total Gym and refuses to do anything else.

33. Don't stand over his shoulder and mumble as he reads.

34. Don't sit on the road to his house and point a hair dryer at his car to see if he slows down. He definitely will get the shot gun.

35. When you finally get him out of the house and he goes golfing, don't yell "swing-batabatabata-suhwing-batter!" He will chase you with his club.

36. Don't program his CD player in the car to play the same song over and over again.

37. He doesn't know how to work the car radio anyway.

38. Don't construct "crop circles" in his front lawn.

39. Don't do it with scissors.

40. Ask him random questions and scribble their answers in a notebook while muttering something about "psychological profiles".

41. Don't holler random numbers when he is counting. He gets distracted easily and after the 14th time of starting over; his shot gun becomes his best friend.

42. Publicly investigate how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise.

43. Tell Shawn that his accent isn't fooling anyone. He will not understand what you mean.

44. Don't lick the flavor off his dental floss.

45. Don't try to confuse him when he finally gets on the computer by telling him he has to speak into the mouse as if it was a CB radio to get everything to work.

handcuff him to a piece of furniture and tell him that you are doing so in case the "big one comes" and you don't want him to fall off.

47. Don't scruff you feet on a dry, shaggy carpet and seek him out as the victim.

48. As he talks, don't smell his shoulder.

49. After that, don't ask if he wore deodorant that day.


"Do you think he will get mad if we post this?" Randy Orton asked as John Cena taped the list to the wall.

John shrugged, finishing his taping and stepping back to look at it. "No, it'll actually help in the long run."

Hunter smiled and walked down with a can of Coke in his hand. "Hey guys. What's up?"

"We just posted the list."

"Ah, 'the list'. He's gonna be relived and now everyone just needs to learn it." Hunter said sipping his coke.

"Learn what?" Shawn asked as he came up from the rear. They turned to look at him muttering their hellos.

"The list that we made so everyone knows what annoys you." John replied as if it was nothing.

Shawn nodded and looked at it. "Not bad. I think you got everything." He commented as he read down the list.

Hunter downed the rest of his coke can and belched loudly near Shawn's ear. Shawn turned around with his eyes glossed over and his face contorted in disgust. Randy waved a hand in front of his own face to try and rid his nose of the smell. "Um…"

"That's nasty Hunter!"

"Um…"

"You should know better than to do that!"

"I'm sorry?"

"You better be!" Shawn said attacking his best friend.

As Shawn and Hunter rolled on the ground fighting, Randy handed John a pen without looking at him. John sighed heavily and took it from him, leaning down to write the final one.

50. Don't down a can of Coke in one go and then burp loudly into Shawn's ear.