A/N: What if Chuck and Sarah actually talked before having "tonnes and tonnes of sex"?
I owe a thank you to the following authors and their works which I had open while writing to see how it should be done. If this is half as good as their stories, I'll be happy.
Frea O'Scanlin (What Fates Impose, The 405 Gets Plowed)
KateMcK (Morgan vs the IOU, Chuck and Sarah vs Whoa)
ninjaVanish (Chuck & Sarah Vs Themselves)
More thanks goes to Frea for giving this little piece of fluff a once-over and making a suggestion which I kinda, sorta, half-implemented.
Disclaimer: Don't own Chuck.
"I think I'm done for the night buddy," Chuck announced as he tossed his game controller down on the table. "I've got the early shift at the Buy More tomorrow and need to get some shut eye."
"What?" Morgan checked his watch. "It's only ten o-clock man! There's at least four more hours of fragging time left. A few more kill streaks and I'll be able to move up a level. You can't bail on me now!"
"Sorry Morgan." Chuck rose from the couch. "You'll have to find someone else to be Captain Cobra's wingman."
"But – oh I get it. Sarah's staying over again isn't she? Say no more. Hos before bros, hos before bros."
"I don't think that's quite right… And are you calling my girlfriend a hoe?"
"What? No! And keep your voice down!" Morgan hissed as he looked nervously behind him.
Chuck glanced into the hallway. "Don't worry, she's reading some reports General Beckman gave her. And if she didn't hurt you over the Barstow condom incident I think you're pretty safe from physical harm now."
Morgan shook his head doubtfully. "She does a good job of hiding it but she's one scary woman, dude. Like, John Casey scary. She can give you this look..."
"And what exactly did you do to earn this look?"
"Me? Well I, uh, might have mentioned to her on the airplane that I was looking forward to having a marathon Call of Duty session with you the night we got back from Paris." Morgan shivered as he recalled Sarah's flat-eyed stare.
"Ah. I wondered where you disappeared to after leaving Castle."
"Yeah, I decided that I missed my mom and spent the night at her place. Discretion is the better part of valour and all that. And earplugs help deal with Big Mike. Well, except when he gets really enthusiastic." Morgan shook his head gloomily. "But Chuck, remember that I was your hetero life partner before Sarah showed up, okay? She has to share you."
Chuck laughed and headed down the hallway. "Good night Morgan." Entering his bedroom he saw his girlfriend sitting cross-legged in the middle of the bed, squinting at a piece of paper she was holding.
"So is it my Chuck time now?" Sarah queried, not looking up.
He grinned and bent over to place a soft kiss on her head. "Heard that, did you?"
"Well I am a spy. And Morgan, no matter what he thinks, isn't exactly discreet," she replied, still squinting at the paper.
"Looks like Agent Walker could use some glasses," Chuck teased as he straightened. "Although I'm not sure how I feel about that. She might finally get a clear look at the guy she's dating."
Sarah lifted her head and turned towards him, reaching out with her free hand to pull Chuck down again. She firmly kissed him and then gently pushed him away. "Agent Walker has had plenty of clear looks at the guy she's dating. Up close and personal. What Agent Walker is having problems with is deciphering these chicken scratches Agent Jones calls handwriting."
Chuck cleared his throat to recover from the kiss and Sarah's "up close and personal" comment and asked, "Can I help with that? I usually have to look over the notes Jeff and Lester make on their offsite install reports. If I can make sense of their hieroglyphics I can probably read Agent Jones' report."
"Jeff and Lester actually fill out forms?"
"Yes. Well, only if the customer is a girl. Their notes generally have to do with calculating her hotness factor. If those were entered into Buy More's customer database we'd have a couple dozen lawsuits on our hands."
Sarah rolled her eyes. "Wait a minute. Morgan sent over those two jokers to fix a computer problem the Orange Orange was having a few weeks ago. You were in Washington. I remember them giggling and doing a lot of writing."
"Yeah, Morgan told me. He actually assigned Skip to the job but Jeff and Lester offered to take Skip's Friday night shift for a month if he gave the job to them."
"So what did their notes say?"
"Um, I actually don't know. You'll have to ask Morgan. He shredded the form."
"He really shredded it? Why would he do that?"
"Well, at this point Morgan knew I had the Intersect 2.0. He said that based on prior history, he didn't want to explain to the police how Jeff and Lester's kung-fued bodies – his words not mine – ended up in the Buy More's dumpster."
Sarah was silent for a moment and then asked, "What prior history?"
Chuck shifted from foot to foot uncomfortably and took a sudden interest in the poster hung beside the bed. "You remember those boys who used to come into the Wienerlicious and ogle you?"
"Yes, they used to drop by pretty regularly and suddenly stopped for some – Oh Chuck, what did you do?"
"Hey I didn't use the Intersect! Or any CIA resources," Chuck said defensively. "Their computers were infected by a virus and they dropped them off at the Buy More to get fixed. While cleaning them up I might have accidentally installed a program that… knocked on the Department of Homeland Security's servers once in a while."
"It turned out okay, I swear. I was able to make it seem a local hacker group installed the software without the boys knowing. They actually got a kick out of working with the DHS guys. And they became too busy to come by and bother you."
Sarah sighed, "I can handle teenage boys, Chuck. And Morgan didn't have to worry. When Jeff and Lester made their appearance you and I weren't even together."
Chuck shifted her gaze back to her. "Morgan was right. He knew I still loved you. And while it wouldn't have come to physical harm, it still would have ended in tears for those two."
Sarah bit her lip. He had always looked out for her no matter what. "Well, make yourself useful and tell me what this says." She handed him the paper she was holding.
"Yes ma'am. Okay… this isn't too bad. Ten a.m., surveillance of subject begins. Twelve p.m., subject leaves house. Twelve-fifteen, Agent Barlow rings doorbell to confirm house is empty. Twelve-twenty, Agent Barlow enters house to plant listening devices while Agent Jones keeps watch. Twelve-thirty-five, Agent Barlow finishes placing bugs… bugs…" Chuck trailed off, a dazed look slowly settling over his face.
"What's the matter, Chuck? Did you flash?" Sarah asked, taking the piece of paper back.
Chuck started, his previously glassy look replaced by one of horror. He whirled around, moved to his desk, and began to frantically run his hands over every object within reach. "Bugs, oh god, bugs!"
Sarah looked at him with bewilderment. "Chuck, what are you doing?"
By now, Chuck had taken to yanking down posters and peering closely at the wall. "Bugs, Sarah, bugs! Oh god. We've been… doing stuff… for three days and it's all been recorded. Why didn't you remember? I mean, okay, you've got nothing to be embarrassed with you looking the way you do – no, you know what? It's not okay! No one should be seeing you naked. Except for me of course. Only if you want me to. Do you think Casey has watched the tapes? Do you think he's passed them on to Washington? I'm going to kill him–"
"Chuck," Sarah cut off his ramblings, "Chuck, look at me please."
Chuck stopped fiddling with the webcam attached to the computer and turned around.
"I deactivated the bugs in the bedroom the night we got home from France. Casey and I removed all the recording equipment from inside the apartment the next morning while you were out getting groceries."
Chuck let go of the breath he had been holding and started fixing the mess he had made.
"But Chuck, it took you three days to remember that every move of yours could have been recorded? Three days? Really?"
Chuck grimaced, hearing the smirk in Sarah's voice. "In my defense," he said, re-hanging a poster, "every time I come in here I'm usually with you and you're kind of, uh, distracting."
"Who, l'il ole me?" Sarah drawled, assuming her Mrs. Charles Charles persona. "Surely Mr. Charles can concentrate better than that."
Chuck grinned when he heard Sarah's ditzy Southern belle accent and stopped what he was doing. He looked at Sarah, really focusing on her for the first time. She was wearing a pair of plaid boyshorts which showed off those long legs that he admired so much. A pale blue lace camisole completed her sleepwear, leaving her arms bare. Her face was washed free of makeup; he loved it when got to see her like this. Gone was the mask she presented to the outside world, she was just his Sarah. And although Chuck appreciated every one of Sarah's… assets, he was always drawn to her eyes. He could never decide what colour they were as they always seemed to change according to her moods. Light grey when she was excited or happy, slate blue when she was preparing for a mission, blue-green when she was worried (usually for him), steely grey when she was angry (again, usually at him). And lately, when he touched her just right, her eyes turned a dark, almost black, grey that he…
"What? No! Yes! See? Distracting!"
Sarah's smirk grew. "I can see that. Is this going to be a problem on our missions, Agent Carmichael? We can't have you distracted when you're supposed to be focusing on getting intel or getting the drop on the bad guy."
"With the dresses you wear on missions it's a miracle that I've been able to remember my name," Chuck grumbled. "I think I'll continue to muddle through." His face brightened, "So, no more bugs recording everything I do or say, huh? Is this a permanent thing? No more babysitters?"
"You're an agent now, Chuck. An agent's place of residence doesn't get monitored."
"It's going to be strange, knowing I can do things like this," he reached out with his hand and caressed Sarah's cheek, "and tell you that I love you without having to hear Casey's play-by-play commentary after. We could go back to having our fountain-side chats. I know how much you look forward to those. No break-ups, I swear."
Sarah smiled briefly. "Chuck… the recording equipment outside is still in place. There are video cameras focused on the front door and bedroom window and a couple more overseeing the courtyard."
"What?" Chuck scowled. "Beckman still doesn't trust me? You would think I would get some leeway after I warned her Shaw was bad. Or is it Casey? I thought he'd be happy that he wouldn't have to listen to Morgan and me nerd out any more."
"No, Chuck. It was me. I requested the outside cameras remain active."
"You, Sarah?" Chuck's shoulders slumped, hurt written across his lowered face. "I thought I had proven myself to you. I know my spying skills don't compare to yours but–"
"Chuck, it wasn't Agent Walker requesting continued surveillance detail on Agent Carmichael. It was Sarah, making sure that her boyfriend Chuck was still protected. Because, god knows, trouble seems to follow you home. Can you understand that?"
Chuck lifted his head and saw the concern etched on his girlfriend's face. He shrugged. There were worse things in the world than wanting to be kept safe by the person you loved. "I guess. But you know Sarah, with the Intersect 2.0 I really can take care of myself." He turned towards the mirror and began to mimic a series of kung-fu moves. "In fact, I can probably protect you as well. Any bad guys show up and I'll – ulp!"
Chuck wasn't exactly sure what had just happened. All he knew that he was lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling, with his head cradled on Sarah's chest. One of her arms was wrapped tightly against his upper torso and the outstretched index finger of her other hand was pressed lightly across his throat.
"What are you doing?"
"Well if I was an enemy agent I'd be holding a knife to your throat right about now." She moved her hand and placed the tip of her finger on the side of Chuck's throat. "Or I'd be getting ready to inject you with a paralyzing drug."
"Chuck, the Intersect only works if you have time to flash. You may not always get that time."
Both Chuck and Sarah were silent for a few seconds before Sarah finally spoke again, "Chuck?"
"Don't you want to at least try to flash and get out of this hold?" she asked.
Chuck shifted slightly, brought up one of his hands, and began to lightly stroke Sarah's bare arm. "Ah, well you know, I'm kinda comfortable like this."
"Goof," Sarah laughed fondly, shoving Chuck off her. "All the Ring has to do is send some undersized brunette bimbo to capture you and we'll all be in real trouble."
Chuck sat up on the bed and turned towards Sarah. "While I agree that the Ring sending anyone after me is a cause for concern, 'undersized brunette bimbo' seems awfully specific. Why–"
"Jill, Lou, Hannah." Sarah recited flatly. "Face it Chuck, you have a type."
"Uh, Jill wasn't exactly short for a woman and none of them could really be accurately described as bim–" Chuck broke off when noticed Sarah's sharply raised eyebrow. "But you know what? So totally not the point." He paused before continuing, "Sarah… you know that I only have one type, right? And it's pretty specific? Tall, blonde-haired superspy going by the name of Sarah Walker?"
Sarah flashed him a small smile. "Okay, that may have been a little cheesy but it's true. The only reason why Jill, Lou, and Hannah happened is because we, you and I, couldn't actually be together. I thought I needed some normalcy in my life but I never stopped wanting something real for us. It was unfair to them, well, okay, Jill got what she deserved, but…" Chuck shrugged his shoulders, "It's always been you."
Sarah moved closer to Chuck, wrapping her arms around him. "Thank you. For not giving up on us."
"Hey, I had a lot of help there. Ellie practically slapped me upside the head telling me to go after you. Morgan had all these crazy plans to help get you back. Even Casey got in the act."
"When you were in Washington. I dropped by his place after Beckman dismissed him to see how he was doing. He said that you were a good woman and that it wasn't too late for us."
"Casey may not say much outside work but when he does say something, it seems it's worth paying attention to. I was freaking out on the plane to Paris, trying to figure out where you were. Casey's the one who got me to calm down and focus."
"Hmmm. Maybe I should be taking Chuck-communication tips from him."
"Yeah, I'm not sure that would be such a good thing for our love life."
Sarah sat back and quirked an eyebrow at him.
Chuck took a deep breath and cried out in a falsetto voice, "Oh moron, oh moron! Yes Bartowski! Yes Bartowski! Oh god, numb nuts!"
Sarah stared at Chuck for a few seconds, outrage warring with a deep desire to laugh. "I do not sound like that!" she exclaimed, tossing a pillow at him.
"Oof. Hey, this is a no-violence zone! Okay, the voice may be off." Sarah opened her mouth. "And I may have taken liberties with the words." Chuck hastened to add. "But I think I've heard the sentiment expressed often enough this past week."
Sarah continued to stare at Chuck, a faint blush appearing on her cheeks. "Well it seems Mr. Bartowski is pretty proud of himself," she finally said.
Chuck started to grin and then stopped. A pensive look crept over his face.
"What is it, Chuck?"
Chuck shook his head and looked down at his shoes. "Not proud, just happy… and relieved." Sarah waited for him to continue. "When it comes down to it, you're Sarah Walker, international superspy. And I'm Chuck Bartowski, an agent because of the Intersect. Your relationship… isn't with Charles Carmichael. It's with me, and my freak outs, nerdgasms, and girlish screams of terror. Compared to Bryce and Cole Barker… well, let's just say I don't see myself sweeping you off your feet."
"You're wrong," Sarah said gently, "for one thing you're a much better kisser than either of them."
Chuck's head shot up. "Sarah–" he began, exasperatedly.
"It's true, Chuck. I swear." she interrupted. "And what did I say before I left for Paris? I fell for you almost from the first moment we met. There was no Charles Carmichael then and I had no idea you had downloaded the Intersect into that brain of yours. There was just this guy helping a ballerina and her father and offering to be my very own baggage handler."
Chuck cringed at the memory. "God, I was so nervous. That wasn't very smooth, was it?"
"No, but it was honest. I could have left with Bryce when he came back or gone with Cole when he popped up. You know I had the opportunity. It would have been easier. But I always chose to stay with you and your freak outs, nerdgasms, girlish screams of terror, and all."
"So you don't want smooth, huh?"
"I didn't say that. That little speech in Castle when you told me you loved me? Very smooth. Playing that 'Feeling Good' song for me the first night we got back? Also very smooth. But also very Chuck. Agent Carmichael is a nice guy but that's not what I want Chuck to turn into. That's not the man I want to be with."
Both of them fell silent, smiling at each other. Sarah eventually spoke up, "I noticed you left a name off the list."
Chuck sighed heavily, "Shaw." Sarah nodded. "Well I thought it was too soon after… you know. Plus, you were actually dating the guy. Before he turned bad, I mean. I understand what you saw in him–"
"No Chuck, I don't think you do," Sarah interrupted. Chuck remained silent, allowing her to continue,
"Shaw was safe."
"Safe? He kept you safe?" Chuck babbled as he jumped off the bed. "Sarah you know I'd do anything to protect you. I'd take a bullet for you. Sure, you'd probably gut me with one of your knives after for doing it but that wouldn't mean I wouldn't–"
"Chuck, stop." Sarah broke into Chuck's ramblings and he once again fell silent. "That's not what I meant." She took a deep breath and continued, "What happened in Prague… hurt." Chuck winced, knowing how much he screwed that situation up. "I understand why you did what you did but it still hurt. I got over Bryce's death, twice, and that didn't hurt as much. I knew I never wanted to feel that way ever again. And then Shaw showed up and he was a good man. And whatever happened between us was safe. Even if it didn't work out, it wouldn't have hurt as much as Prague. So, Shaw was safe. Do you understand?"
Chuck eventually nodded and then said hesitantly, "So when I asked you to leave with me and go to Mexico…"
"I was going to meet you at the station." Sarah smiled at the grin slowly coming over Chuck's face. "I realized being the recipient of a Bartowski eyebrow dance was worth some heartache. And what did you say before?" Her voice grew huskier, "It's always been you."
Chuck's grin became even larger as he sat down beside Sarah and pulled her close. "You know I'm a quick learner, right?" he murmured into her ear. Sarah nodded. "That means I don't make the same mistake twice." He kissed her neck. "Ergo, Prague won't ever happen again."
"Ergo?" Sarah rolled her eyes, as her hands busily undid Chuck's shirt buttons.
"Ergo. So, there's no chance I'm going to drive you away. None whatsoever. You're stuck with me as long as you'll have me." His hands started to lift up her camisole.
"Sounds just about perfect." Sarah raised her arms, allowing Chuck to remove the garment. "So Chuck, you think you're a quick learner? I may have some new things to teach you. Think you can keep up?"
"I'm looking forward to the homework, Miss Walker."
A/N 2: What do Chuck and Sarah talk about the next night? Stay tuned!