The first time our lips touched, I felt the spark too. In the next days I thought I only kept thinking about it because I was lonely, because I couldn't find my warmth with Coco anymore. Even though I always kept it at the back of my mind, I knew you were special the day I met you. You were open, had seen the hard world for yourself, and was yet so innocent.
The moment you said "I've fallen in love with you Christian" my heart stopped beating. I wanted to, but I could never deserve a person like you. I'd yelled at you so many times, just because you were you, I just couldn't imagine you feeling the same for me. So I kept pushing you away. Hard. In a strange way I thought it would be less painful for both. I was yet again wrong. It hurt like nothing ever hurt in my life. Not even my parents dying.
The moment I saw you dancing with the guy in the nightclub my eyes clouded over. I didn't want to be jealous, but I just couldn't stop seeing you making love to that guy. It was me I wanted you to make love to, all night long. So I decided to be irrational, if I got into a fight with the guy you might see what an ass it was. Yet again I was wrong. You didn't see the guy for who I was, no I let you see the aggressive side of me. The side always kept deeply tucked away in me.
I only remember how you came up to my room the next morning, pushing me to talk you. Yet again saying how much you've fallen in love with me. Hearing it for the second time made me realize how much of an ass I really were to you. I had to make the decision, either opening the door and never letting you go, or keeping the door shut and hurt you, and me, more. Even I couldn't handle being away from you anymore.
I opened the door, the door to love and happiness. And I never want to go back.