[ Concerning . . . L o n e l i n e s s ]
There was only one word to describe how Kaidoh felt right now. Lonely.
Lonely because Momo was an idiot. He felt empty, alone, as if no one could help him. He wanted to blame it on Momo, but somehow didn't even have the willpower to do that. After all, it was Kaidoh's fault after all...
Every day, Momo would go to Kaidoh's house or Kaidoh would go to Momo's, and, after watching TV and doing homework and excercising, they'd make out and sometimes fool around. But lately, Momo had to leave early nearly every day, early to the point that some days Momo came and automatically began the make-out session, then had to leave straight away. This was the first part of it, but Kaidoh was okay. He understood that Momo probably had other things to do. What he didn't understand was that one day, after Momo left, Kaidoh went out to practice.
And he saw Momo hugging Inui, smiling and laughing.
Was this where Momo left to go every day?
The betrayal hit him at full force, and he'd run away, and had not contacted Momo since. He didn't want to. Ever again. But he did, Kaidoh already missed everything about Momo. His big, strong hands, his spiky, gelled hair, his brown-violet eyes, his big dumb grin, how he loved to rival everything Kaidoh did. How he constantly seeked attention from Kaidoh, fighting with him, then laughing, then proceeding to make out with him.
Damn, he missed him.
Momo missed Kaidoh. Why wasn't the idiot picking up his phone calls? What had happened? Was it because he'd been spending increased time with Inui?
The thing was, well, Momo had gone to Inui, who was one of Kaidoh's best friends, in order to find more information concerning Mamushi. At times, he felt like all he could do was to make fun of Kaidoh, therefore starting a conflict of which he used the tension created to turn into some sort of physical session.
It was nice, but what he really wanted wasn't just to have sex with Kaidoh, he wanted to be in a real relationship. However, when questioned, he realized that he didn't know how to lead that type of relationship.
Which is where Inui came in. Inui, knowing that the happier the two were, the better their game would be, had worked out, in his notebook, what Momo wanted. Momo was starting to learn the basics of a relationship (Ehh! I have to say I love him everyday!), and since he wanted to learn quicker, he had to take some time off from Kaidoh.
That day, Inui had wanted Momo to practice hugging.
"Ehh? I have to hug you?" Momo really did not want to hug Inui. Inui was so...creepy, and he smelled weird.
"Unfortunately, it is either me or Fuji, who is the only other person close by."
What did Inui have, a GPS device installed on everyone? Momo wouldn't put it past him. Anyway, hugging Fuji would be equally weird, so Momo just ended up hugging Inui.
Inui noted Momo's disgusted expression.
"I know this is hard for you. But Kaidoh will be much happier if you smile and laugh in his ear while you hug him."
Momo tried a few more times till he got it right, and the last time was when Kaidoh had seen him. Momo hadn't seen Kaidoh, though.
"Uggh. Can I stop now?" Momo asked, as soon as he let go. He brushed off his clothes, trying to get the disgusting smell off of him. God, he'd throw these clothes away and take a shower, then go see Kaidoh.
"Yes. Just remember to greet Kaidoh with that hug the next time you see him."
But the problem was, Momo never got to use 'that hug'. Because Kaidoh was ignoring him, not calling him, not picking up his calls, not opening his texts, not returning his emails or coming online Messenger. Heck, Momo had even gone to Kaidoh's house and knocked on the door, but Mrs. Kaidoh was the one to answer. She said that her son didn't want to see anyone, and apologized.
Damn, Momo missed Kaidoh.
Inui looked up from his data notebook. "Yes, Kaidoh-san?"
"..." Kaidoh couldn't bring himself to ask anything about Momo. He'd probably start crying. "Nothing, gomene."
Inui raised his eyebrows, but looked back down. For some reason, Kaidoh seemed to be depressed. And Momo hadn't come to see him for a week already. Their game wasn't exactly falling apart, but it wasn't as good as it was usually, either. That surprised him a little because Kaidoh seemed to be doing more training than usual, exceeding his training menu by four or five times.
Which reminded Inui. He frowned. "Kaidoh, you should not do that much extra training, it will destroy your muscles."
"..Hai, senpai." It wasn't any good, anyway. Whenever Kaidoh trained, it reminded him of Momo. Because in order to spend more time with Kaidoh, Momo always came along. Although Kaidoh kept hissing when Momo failed to complete the same amount of excercise that Kaidoh did, it was really nice to have someone else around. It made him feel less lonely. Especially since afterwards, Momo would always take him out somewhere to eat, and then they'd kiss and stuff. And then afterwards, he'd feel loved, because Momo actually stayed around for the morning. He missed that happiness.
He wanted Momo back.
...From then on, Kaidoh didn't train anymore.
"No, not today, Echizen." Right after Kaidoh had not-so-officially broke up with him, he had pretty much went to McDonald's and ordered everything on the menu, then came home and ate everything in the fridge.
He'd felt like throwing it up after that, and his mother had told him to stop, so he hadn't eaten much since.
Echizen tugged his cap down. "Eh, you never go with me anymore, Momo-chan-senpai."
"Maybe you should go with someone else," suggested Momo. He'd been eating one burger a day at school, and he didn't even feel like eating that anymore. It was like any food he saw always reminded him of some date he'd gone on with Kaidoh. Because he always ate on every date they went on, even the tennis ones. (He got to eat other things instead of food, in that case.)
Echizen sighed. "Who?"
Well. "Always with Oishi."
Was his senpai stupid? "Always with Kikumaru."
"I meant together."
Well. Picky, picky. "Inui?"
Yes, his senpai was stupid. "Inui's always off with you or Kaidoh."
So Echizen'd noticed. Maybe Kaidoh had noticed, maybe that was why Kaidoh was ignoring him. "Eh...Taka?"
"...Taka-senpai has a sushi restaurant, remember?"
Oh. Yeah. Momo felt a little bit stupid.
"Don't even say Horio," muttered Echizen. Momo winced; that was the name he was thinking of saying next.
"Well, what about Fuji?"
Echizen was the one who winced this time. (Which Momo found interesting, Echizen never winced.) "Fuji tried to feel me up the other day."
A little too much info. "Uh. Okay. Ehm. I guess that leaves Tezuka." He made a half-laugh. As if Tezuka would actually -
Ryoma blushed. "Tezuka's the one I sorta wished Fuji was."
Waaayyy too much information. Did NOT need to know that. Did not WANT to know that. "Well, then, why don't you just ask him to go with you, then?"
Echizen scoffed. "He'll say no, of course."
"How do you know that? Have you asked him yet?" Momo checked his watch. He had to get to Kaidoh soo-Oh, wait, Kaidoh wasn't talking to him anymore. Damn it.
"No? Well, then go ask him."
Echizen made a weird face. "But it's Buchou."
Momo thought about this. The first time he'd asked Kaidoh out, it was to play tennis. But Kaidoh was so thick that he thought that Momo just wanted to train. Momo definitely changed that in the bathroom, yep yep.
The memories made Momo want to tear up.
"Ahh. Well, you could ask him out on a tennis date, that way he doesn't suspect anything." Inui's calculations came in useful here.
"But then it's not a date."
"If you keep going out on tennis dates then he'll eventually catch on. Tezuka's not stupid, you know."
Echizen thought about this.
After a while, he said, "Woah, you're more useful than I thought you were, Momo-chan-senpai."
"Ehh! What'd you say Echizen!"
But Ryoma was already far away by now, laughing.
Momo sighed. He wished that he could use the strategies that he'd learned on Kaidoh, not to help Echizen.
"I'm not doing this anymore." The voice was desperate, firm.
Kaidoh wanted to keep Momo's warm hand on his shoulder forever. Momo seemed to want that, too, because of his strong grip.
But it wouldn't do. He forced himself to put on a scowl instead of breaking into sobs.
"Fshuuu. What do you want, teme?" Shi, shit. Keep your voice from trembling. Don't let it tremble. Don't cry. Don't..!
Momo grabbed him into a hug from behind. "Why, Kaidoh! Why!"
Kaidoh couldn't stop the tears from flowing, but he might be able to stop Momo from seeing them.
"I. Never. Want. To. See. Your. Goddamn fat ass. Ever. Again."
Each word was accented with a punch. The punches were messy, not landed straight to the eye or mouth. Because Kaidoh didn't really want to hurt Momo, just to get him away. Momo didn't fight back. He didn't want to hurt Kaidoh at all.
Kaidoh ended with, "You understand that!"
He was too busy running away to notice that Momo was crying, too.
The first day Momo disappeared from school, Kaidoh hoped that he hadn't punched him too hard.
The second, he went to the hospital to check. There was nothing about Momo.
The third, he tried to get Momo out of his mind and ended up just trying not to scream.
The fourth, he went to the tennis courts with his bandana on. Although the place was full of memories, maybe owning a few people would make him feel better.
Instead, it made him just want to break down.
So that's where Momo had been the past three days.
Momo's state right now was so messed up that Kaidoh didn't even recognize him at first. His hair was flattened down due to lack of gel, and oily. His usual violet eyes, challenging and daring, were dull and wavering, as if Momo was half asleep. There were dark circles under his eyes, and it looked like he hadn't eaten for days.
"H..Hey, someone play, against, m...me," Momo drawled. He was grinning. It was a haunted, messed up grin, just like the rest of him. Kaidoh could still see the bruises fading from a few days ago.
"Man, this guy's just dominating the courts," a random player complained. Kaidoh walked closer, so he could hear their conversation.
"I know, right? Someone should get him off the courts."
"But no one can beat him, and he said that he's not leaving until someone does or until he dies."
"Dammit, is he that good?"
"Why don't you try to play against him? He won me in five minutes."
"Damn, I can't even beat you!"
The guy laughed. "Come on, let's go, this asshole'll eventually drop dead, he hasn't eaten for three days anyway."
His prediction was right. Momo had noticed Kaidoh, but only because of his bandana.
"Mamushi! Oi, Mamushi! Finally someone who's my match-" Momo's eyes lit up, and he stumbled towards Kaidoh. He didn't notice a rock, though, and fell.
Most of the players laughed. The ones that didn't just jeered and kicked him instead.
"Hey, finally! We can play a match!"
"I hope this bastard dies."
"Come on, let's kick him-"
Kaidoh moved forward, scowling angrily. Couldn't these idiots see that Momo was dehydrated, half-asleep? He was probably hallucinating by now, they should have been ashamed for losing to him when he was in this state.
They looked towards Kaidoh; some of them left, because of his scary face. A few more left when he hissed again. There were about five or six people left.
"Eh? Who're you?"
Kaidoh glared at him.
"Heh. Are you friends with this idiot?"
One of the other guys smirked. "He's probably the guy's boyfriend."
Kaidoh's eyes widened at this, and he averted his eyes for a moment.
"Oh. So he is. Ha, gay fag."
"What about it?" Kaidoh muttered.
"Eh? What'd you say? I didn't hear you."
Kaidoh looked at him face on, repeating his words slowly. "I said, what about it? Don't you understand English? (Japanese. You know. Whatever, the language)" "You wanna go?"
Kaidoh hissed. "I only fight with equals."
The guy charged, but his leader stopped him, sneering.
"How's this. This is a tennis court, right? You beat me, you get your boyfriend back. You lose...your boyfriend, well, he gets beaten up. Just like you."
Of course Kaidoh won. What did you think?
"Mmm. I'm in heaven, I'm in heaven." Momo curled his fingers in Kaidoh's hair, smiling contentedly. He was laying in Kaidoh's bed, the warm pink covers partly over him.
"Baka." But Kaidoh runs his fingers through Momo's hair as well. It's gelled, which is the way Kaidoh likes it, because it's still all soft at the roots.
"Don't call me that, Kaidoh, since we're in heaven now."
It was so nice when Momo said his name. But what?
"We're not in heaven, dumbass."
"Yes we are, I died and came to heaven, or else you wouldn't be with me right now. Because you broke up with me when I was still alive, remember?" But Momo smiles anyway, because he really does believes that.
Kaidoh punches him, then turns away.
"We're not in heaven."
"..." Momo's a little dazed, he's been hit so many times lately.
An awkward silence went by. "...Hey, Mamushi, why'd you ignore me for so long?"
Kaidoh hissed. It was better to just tell him, at this point. At least he'd get to stall and have some more time with him. "I caught you."
"Caught me?" What?
"..." Oh. Crap. That probably offended him, didn't it..? "I'm sorry, Kaidoh..."
Kaidoh hissed. "You could have just said that you liked him too."
"You and Inui-'
"No no no!" Momo started laughing. This was hilarious. "You think I like INUI?"
What the hell did that mean? "Fshuuu! Well, you were hugging him..!"
Ouch. So he'd seen that. "Well, for one, Inui smells disgusting-"
"I don't need to know what he smells like-"
"No, I mean, I was practicing!"
"Practicing...To...You know. Hug you." He felt like a retard.
"...What, Mamushi? You don't believe me?" Momo scoffed. "I think you'd have more of a chance with Inui than I would, and like I said, he smells disgusting. Like a labratory all the time, ugh. Just thinking about it makes me want to smell you instead." Momo hugs Kaidoh's back, licking his neck.
"...Ah...!" Kaidoh pushed Momo away. "Idiot, licking me means tasting me, not smelling me." But that made him so happy. And made him feel stupid.
Two weeks without Momo, because of his own stupidity.
"I like doing that too."
"Fshuuuu." Kaidoh snuggled into Momo's warmth. Yes, he loved this feeling.
Then Momo understood. He didn't need to go to Inui to improve their relationship. Because Kaidoh...
"..Baka. I like you the way you are," Kaidoh muttered.
"Hey, Mamushi, let's fight."
"Come on, come on. Mamushi."
"Mamushi, Mamushi, Mamu-"
Kaidoh let himself have a half-grin. "Don't call me Mamushi, dumbass."
"You're the dumbass."
"What'd you say?"
Momo kissed him on the cheek. "I said I called you a dumbass, Mamushi."
"Again with the Mamushi, Mamushi, you dumbass..."
And the hot smex ensues. 3 Okay, guys, it's 1:11. Imma sleep nao. I feel a lot better. :]
Still wanting those ideas! X33 SORRY FOR POSTING THIS LATE =C I totally did NOT have wireless yesterday. O:~