Title: A Simple Request
Game: Fire Emblem 7: Blazing Sword (though it really could be for any of the games because it refers to OCs in general)
Challenge 010: Mary Sue/Gary Stu
Word Count: 621
Pairings/Characters: The Alliance of Original Characters That Receive Completely Unwarranted Criticism and Lack a Witty Acronym (TAOCTRCUCLWA); Mary Sue/Gary Stu/Tactician/Mark
Warnings: Lethal doses of the apathy and bordum of a Xirysa. Beware.
Author's Notes: The title was inspired by an essay written by Jonathan Swift, the author of Gulliver's Travels. If you ever have time, I implore you to read "A Modest Proposal". Absobloodylutely brilliant.
I switched between 3 or 4 other ideas before finally settling on this one, which was actually my original. It didn't turn out the way I wanted, however, because I pretty much gave up half way through. Still, I've got something to show for my efforts so whatever. Have fun reading!
(...Still can't believe I wrote it, though.)


-x-x-x-

To Whom It May Concern:

It has come to our attention that a certain character archetype has been suffering from unnecessary and unwanted backlash in recent times. The archetype in question has done nothing to warrant the aforementioned hostilities and continues to struggle to survive in the lands of Elibe, despite their own personal hardships. I speak, of course, of those who have been wrongfully mislabeled with the misnomer "Mary Sue"—or their male counterparts, the "Gary Stus". I implore you, dear reader, to listen to the plights of these poor souls, and to find in you the compassion to give them the compassion and love that they so deserve.

We write this message in the hope that you, the general Fire Emblem fan community, will be able to see us for what we are: simply people, through in through. The fact that a rather large number of us aren't entirely human aside, we too have feelings. The fact that many of the stories in which we are present revolve around those stories is inconsequential to this argument.

The fact remains: it is painful to be perfect.

Imagine, dear reader, the situation we alleged "Sues" find ourselves in. We are ostracized, shunned by the majority of the fandom, and shunned for a single reason—a reason so petty and frivolous that make even the most prolific and eloquent authors seem nothing more than sullen children.

What is this reason, you ask? It's easy, really.

They're jealous. They envy our perfection, and how despite all the hardships we go through everything in our lives fall beautifully into place.

But is this truly our fault? Are we to blame for our perfect? Surely, reader, you must know that no one asks to be born this way—to be born with amazing hair, flawless skin, crystalline eyes and a perfect body the envy of everyone we know, regardless of the fact that we do absolutely nothing to maintain our figures?

We do not ask to be born to twisted and corrupted familial lineages, nor do we wish we were the sole heir/the last of our kind/etc. Having the skill to utilize so many different types of weaponry and spells becomes cumbersome, and having so many men and women falling in love with you on site is rather irritating, to say the least.

In short, we request that the stigma of "Mary Sue" or "Gary Stu" not be used so lightly in the future, for we are people as well and the label does indeed effect us in ways detrimental to our physical, mental, and emotion health; instead, we ask that you refer to us as you would any "canon" character, regardless of how superior we are to them in every way.

At this point, reader, we must bid you a fond farewell; hopefully, you can see that we are not as "perfect" as we were deemed to be in the past.

If not, we leave you with these meaningful parting words: "OMG WE R NOT SUES U BIATCHES I HAET U I HAET U I HAET U O GAWD U MADE FUN OF MY BOOTIFUL MASTERPIECE IMMA RITE MOAR BECUZ I CAN ADN I DON'T CARE IF YOU LIKE ET OR NOT UR JUST JELUS BECUZ I RITE SOOOOOOO MUCH BETTER THAN U AND NO I'M NOT A 12 YEAR OLD LIL GRL THAT'S MY OWN REAL CHARACTER THAT I JUST MADE UP AND HAET U BECAUSE U DON'T LIKE HER EVEN THO SHE'S PERFECT AND—!"

…This sums it all up quite nicely.

Thank you for taking the time to read this notice. That is all.

Sincerely,

The Alliance of Original Characters That Receive Completely Unwarranted Criticism and Lack a Witty Acronym (TAOCTRCUCLWA)

-x-x-x-


Xirysa Says: The much-awaited tenth challenge from FE Contest: The Mary Sue/Gary Stu challenge! Unfortunately, mine leaves very much to be desired. Oh well. Review if you want, but no critique on this, seeing as I didn't care at all, so why should I ask someone to care about it? Yeah.