SasoDei - Beauty and the Beast

Part One

Once upon a time, in a far away land, a young prince lived in a shining castle. Although he had everything his heart desired the prince was spoiled, selfish and unkind. But then, one winter's night, an old beggar woman came to the castle and offered him a single rose, in return for shelter from the bitter cold. Repulsed by her haggard appearance, the prince sneered the gift and turned the old woman away. But she warned him "Not to be deceived by appearances, for beauty is found within", and when he dismissed her again the old woman's ugliness melted away, to reveal a beautiful enchantress. The prince tried to apologize but it was too late for she had seen that there was no love in his heart. As punishment, she transformed him into a hideous beast and placed a powerful spell on the castle and all who lived there.

Ashamed of his monstrous form the beast concealed himself inside his castle with a magic mirror as his only window to the outside world. The rose she had offered was truly an enchanted rose, which would bloom until his twenty-first year. If he could learn to love, and earn their love in return by the time the last petal fell, then the spell would be broken. If not, he would be doomed to remain a beast for all time. As the years past, he fell into despair, and lost all hope. For who could ever learn to love a beast?


The blonde gave a sigh and he walked through his village, on his way to the bookstore to borrow out a new book. His name was Deidara, and he was sought by men and woman alike for his looks. As he walked through the streets, villagers called out 'Bonjour', waving at him happily. He smiled and would grudgingly return their greetings politely. Deidara stopped to say hello to the baker, Naruto. "Bonjour, Naruto. How's business, un?"

Naruto turned to him, and gave the blonde a wide grin. "Well, bonjour Deidara. It is nice to see you. Business is booming! Believe it!" Deidara gave a nod. "So, where are you off to?"

"Oh," Deidara waved the green book at the blond baker, "I need a new book to read. This one was alright; it was about magic beans and giants." They both said goodbye, and Deidara was once more on his way to the store.

Eventually, he made it, greeting the old book seller politely. "Bonjour, monsieur." Deidara smiled at him as he turned around.

The old man gave him a smirk. "Bonjour, Deidara." The book seller was named Jiriya, and had once been a famous author. He was also a bit of a pervert, but that meant that he would always give Deidara a discount, so the blonde really couldn't complain. "How was the reading?"

"It was really good, un. Interesting." He handed the man the green book, and climbed up one of the store ladders, browsing along the shelf. "I think I'll borrow…This one." The blonde pulled a dark blue book from the shelf and showed it to the man.

"Oh, Sleeping Paradise? That's one that I wrote!" Jiriya laughed a haughty chuckle. "But you've already read it twice."

Deidara shrugged. "Yeah, but it's my favourite. It puts a weird twist on the Sleeping Beauty fairytale, un…A weird…Sexual twist…But I guess that it's kind of epic."

"Well, in that case, it's all yours. Free of charge." Jiriya winked at the blonde.

"Really? Awesome, thanks so much, un."

"Have fun now." Deidara nodded and left the store, beginning to read the book for the third time as he walked, dodging other people as he went.

Everyone of the village admitted that, while Deidara was the most beautiful person each had ever seen, he was also one of the most odd.

However, there was one whom wanted the blonde more than anything else. "I'll have him if it's the last thing I do! CHA!" The pinkette threw her fist into the air aggressively. This certain girl's name was Sakura Whoreuno…Sorry, 'Haruno'…Yes, anyway…The girl was the most useless- I mean determined in the entire village. She wanted Deidara.

"Like, OMG! You're so cool, Sakura!" That was the pinkette's crony, a girl by the name of Ino, who was just as obsessive as Sakura. She had long blonde hair, but it was no where near as beautiful as Deidara's golden locks. Ino, however, wore her hair in a similar way to the blonde, but didn't get even half as much attention.

The sane villagers tended to avoid the duo, least they lose their own minds. They also had a habit of bursting out into song, which would cause the villagers to be put under a spell, causing them to sing as well.


Deidara was almost home, when he was stopped by an irritating, familiar voice. "DEIDARA! WAIT UP!" The blonde cursed under his breath and turned around to see Sakura running over to him.

He smiled at her politely, hiding his displeasure. "Bonjour Madame, nice to see you, un."

The pinkette noticed the book, and gave a disgusted look. "Why are you reading?" She took the novel from the blonde and tossed it carelessly into a puddle of mud. Deidara quickly grabbed it, trying to clean it. The book appeared to be all right. "I mean, come on! You have more important things to do besides reading. It might cause you to get ideas, and start thinking!" She gave a prideful hum. "You should be out hunting, like all the other boys."

Deidara forced himself not to sneer. Stupid girl. "I would rather stay at home to help my dad."

"Oh," the blonde wasn't the least bit surprised when Ino popped up out of no where, "Onoki is a complete lunatic!" Both Sakura and Ino began to laugh.

Deidara glared at them, holding his book to his chest. "Hey! My Dad might be crazy, but he isn't a lunatic!"

Sakura stopped laughing and hit Ino on the head. "Yeah! His dad isn't a lunatic!"

Deidara suddenly heard an explosion go off, turning to see that it came from his house. "Oh dammit!" The blonde quickly forgot about the Idiot Duo and began running home. He got there in no time, opening the door to the cellar, where smoke was curling up out of. The blonde went down the stairs to hear his father screaming abuse.

"I'VE HAD IT! I GIVE UP!" The man threw a wrench at the ground.

Deidara gave a sigh and picked up the tool, offering it to the old man. "Of course you won't. You'll complete it, go to the fair tomorrow, and become a famous inventor...Or complete it, go to the fair, lose and then blame it on me…Either way you'll finish it, un."

Onoki frowned at the blonde, and then snatched the wrench back from Deidara. "Of course!" The old man went back to tinkering with the machine he was working on. "Make yourself useful and grab me a rock from outside!"

Deidara rolled his eyes and climbed back up the steps, grabbing one of the large stones which were piled next to the door. He easily managed to carry it into the cellar, placing it onto the large red cross on the floor. The blonde took a cautionary step back as Onoki pulled down on the lever, activating the machine. The chain reaction eventually caused the large hammer on it to swing downwards at the rock. The stone shattered on collision, and the hammer moved back up as the machine finished.

"SUCCESS!" The old man began to jump happily in the air. Two jumps later and he began to complain about his back and hips aching.

"…Dad…" Deidara coughed into his fist. "…" The blonde suddenly gave a wide grin, clapping his hands together. "THAT'S THE BEST CONTRAPTION EVER! YOU'RE SO COOL! THE WAY THE ROCK EXPLODED, UN!"

…Deidara had a thing for explosions…He called them 'Art'.

"Whoa, settle down, boy!" the man laughed loudly. "I guess that now I know that it works, I should be on my way to the fair. Make yourself useful and help me load this into the cart."


Deidara waved goodbye to his father and their horse, which was called Sai. "Have a safe trip! Don't go into any creepy looking castles, un!"

"MAKE ME!" the old man gave a loud laugh as he, Sai and the cart carrying his invention disappeared into the woods.

"…" Deidara face-palmed. "The famous last words…Now where did I put that book, un…?"


Onoki had been gone since yesterday, but the fair did last for three days, so Deidara wasn't worried in the least. Well, of his father any way...

A knock emanated from the door, and the blonde raised an eyebrow. Who could that be? He opened the door to see a certain annoying pinkette standing there. Before the blonde could even open his mouth, she barged in.

"BONJOUR DEIDARA!" She gave him a wide, satanic grin.

Deidara blinked, sweat-dropping at the same time. "…Bonjour Sakura…"

"So, Deidara…I have a 'proposal' for you." She gave a cackle at the pun. "Anyway, picture this. A rustic hunting lodge, your latest kill roasting over the fire. Your little wife massaging your feet. While the little ones play on the floor with the dogs…Oh, we'll have 6 or 7!"

Deidara swallowed. "…Dogs, un?"

"No, Dei!" She gave a cackle. "Beautiful girls! Like me!"

"…Imagine that…" Deidara hid his distaste. What the hell was this girl talking about?

Sakura sat on one of the chairs, feet on the table. "So Dei, will you marry me? Is it yes? Or is it…Oh Yes?"

"…I…" Deidara was shocked. "I just don't…deserve you…"

Sakura laughed. "Who does?" She grinned wide at him. Deidara sweat-dropped once more.

"…I'm sorry, but we're just too different…I mean, you're a girl…and I'm a guy…"

"…WHAT?" She got to her feet and marched over to the blonde. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN? WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A BOY AND A GIRL!"

"…Thanks for the offer, but…" Deidara backed up against the door. He turned the handle slowly, suddenly opening it. He grabbed the pinkette with one hand and tossed her out of the cabin and into a pool of mud. "But I like men. Bye, un!" Deidara slammed the door, locking it quickly. He gave a relieved sigh. "That was close."

Deidara waited a few minutes, before picking up the basket to feed the animals. He cautiously opened the door. "Is she gone?" no sign of her. He sighed. "God, can you imagine?" He rolled his eyes at the animals as he walked down the stairs and into the small fenced off area, throwing seed for the creatures. "She asked me to marry her!" He sung in a high, mocking voice. "Madame Iwa, can't you just see it? Madame Iwa, my little wife?" Deidara gave a gagging motion and stopped singing. "Oh please, I want much more than this provincial life! I want adventure!" He chucked the bucket down onto the floor, and walked out of the fenced off area. The blonde sat down in the field of dandelions which sat behind his house. "Like hell. I don't want to marry any girl, let alone that fat vache!" He closed his eyes and began to imagine himself in some far off fairytale. Twirling around a room with the man of his dreams…

Deidara was brought out of his dream when he suddenly heard a loud neigh, and he turned his head to see his horse, Sai, running out of the woods. The cart and machine were still following behind him, but the blonde's father was no where in sight. Deidara quickly stood up as Sai ran to him, giving another neigh.

"What's wrong? Where's dad, un?" The white horse shook its head and Deidara quickly unclipped the cart, hopping onto the horse's back.

Sai reared onto his back legs. "He went into a creepy looking castle." Yeah, animals talked.

"…Of course why did I even bother asking…Whatever, come on Sai, lead the way." The horse nodded and began running the way it had come.

As the narrator, while they are on their way to the castle, I shall use this space here to describe how Deidara looked as all I've really said about him is that he is a blonde. He had effeminate features, such as a slim jaw line, a very slim waist, a flawless complexion, and a pair of bright azure eyes. His left, however, was hidden beneath a bang of golden hair. His locks were long, and he kept some of his hair tied up in a messy, high ponytail. He always wore a bright blue dress and a white apron…When he was young his mother had always wanted a girl and had treated him like one until she died when he was five. His father had continued to raise him to be effeminate, wanting to respect the wishes of his wife.

The white horse suddenly stopped as they reached a large pair of iron doors. "This is it, Deidara."

The blonde nodded and hopped off of the horse, raising an eyebrow up at the castle beyond the doors. "…Definitely creepy, un." He sighed and pushed the gates open, finding his father's yellow hair ribbon lying on the path. Deidara picked it up and tied it around his wrist.

"Hey! Don't leave me out here with the wolves!" The blonde looked back at Sai, and gave a…sigh…He walked over to the gates, holding one open for the horse. Sai trotted in and Deidara closed the iron door. "But I'm staying out here. You're on your own."

"Whatever, un." Deidara turned and began walking towards the castle. "Why is it always a creepy castle? Why can't it ever be a Castle on a Cloud?"

"DON'T MAKE A LES MISERABLE REFERENCE!" Deidara turned to glare at Sai, and then turned back as he walked across the long stone bridge.

"I was referring to Jack and the Beanstalk…But whatever, un."

Deidara looked up at the castle once more. Lightening flashed in the background threateningly. It was a dark and monstrous looking place. An enormous gargoyle sat on the very top of the castle, its wings outstretched and lined with what could have been studs. The blonde gulped, but finished walking across the stone bridge, starting to ascend the stone steps towards whatever demons might lurk in a place as evil as this one.