It Doesn't Mean We're Lesbians
I was up until three writing this. Mostly because my brain works very slowly that late, but still.
Disclaimer: If I drank all the Felix Felicis in the world, I wouldn't own Harry Potter.
Holding hands, Lily Evans and James Potter entered the Great Hall for lunch.
James slung both his bag and hers under the bench as they joined their friends. Alice Hill and Nancy Peterson scooted over to make room for Lily, but James had to shove his group out of the way so as to remain next to his girlfriend.
"Okay. Never mind," Alice declared, dropping her fork with a clatter. "I'll have to dash to the library if I want to finish this in time for Astronomy tonight."
"Good seeing you too," Lily said dejectedly, having only just arrived. Pulling her bag over her shoulder, Alice rolled her eyes.
"Good afternoon, Lily," she crooned too sweetly, hugging her from behind and planting a kiss on the top of her best friend's head.
"Okay, you can go now," Lily allowed happily. Alice scampered from the room.
"It's so good to have a free period next," Remus gloated, eating his food slowly to piss off his friends.
"Hey, I actually like Herbology," Sirius defended through a full mouth.
Peter, who was putting the finishing touches on his Antipodean Opaleye sketch, nodded vaguely. "I'd like to pass Care of Magical Creatures so I can work with animals, slacker."
"Never thought I'd hear Wormtail call you a slacker, Moony," James laughed, reaching over Peter to get a roll.
"Hey, it's not like I'm going to be given any quality job opportunities past Hogwarts," Remus said darkly.
As was custom, the three other Marauders looked sternly at their friend, until one of them would work up the attitude to say –
"Moony, shut up," Peter stated bluntly.
"Don't talk like that, mate," Sirius agreed. "You know we've got your back. You can count on us."
James nodded vehemently, though his mouth was full of stew.
The two groups dissolved as their members began to disperse to their next classes. Peter and Sirius both went out to the grounds, Remus to the Gryffindor common room, and Lily, Nancy, and James all climbed the marble staircase to go to Arithmancy, Muggle Studies, and History of Magic, respectively.
"That was so nice, what you blokes said to Remus," Lily commended, again hand-in-hand with James. He shrugged it off, obviously eating up the attention.
"Yeah, it's good to see friends as close as you guys," Nancy agreed. The first bell rang. "Ah, shit," she groaned. "I'll be late to Muggle Studies. Later, love."
Taken aback, James was about to affrontedly reply that he was no one's love but Lily's, but Lily herself overrode him with, "Oh, bye, sweetheart! I love you!"
James, baffled, nevertheless leaned in to kiss Lily on the cheek, as he had to go the same way as Nancy. "See you later, darling – "
"Bye," Lily dismissed flatly, heading up another staircase to Arithmancy without a backward glance at her boyfriend, still poised ridiculously to bestow his kiss.
"Come on," Nancy chuckled, pulling him into the flow of students.
"Uh, that's a bit closer than we boys get," James commented, continuing their conversation. "I'd say you girls are officially closer than the Marauders."
Nancy snickered. "Why do you look so put out? There's no one closer than you, if that's what you're worried about. I promise."
"Well, Lily barely looked at me to say bye, but she practically delivered a speech for you," James replied, understandably a little miffed.
"Silly, silly boy," Nancy shook her head sadly. "Girls always love their girlfriends way more than their boyfriends. Honestly." James' eyes went wide. Nancy rolled her eyes. "I know you're thinking that I'm confirming every boy's sick fantasies, but that does not mean that we're lesbians."
"Um, no," he countered. "For the first part, anyway. We'll talk about the second part later." Nancy rolled her eyes once more. "But just yesterday, Lily told me I was the most important thing in her life."
Nancy's pitying look sent his triumphant one straight to the gutter. "Sweetheart," she soothed, trying to let him down easy. "She was only saying that so she wouldn't hurt your feelings." They'd only reached the junction of the hallway where they'd have to part. "Every girl's most important asset is her girls."
"But – "
"Ask anyone in History of Magic. I dare you."
All right, then, he would.
"What is the most important thing to you in this world?" he'd asked every girl in his History of Magic class (honestly, Binns practically encouraged them to ignore him).
"Um… my dormmates, probably."
"My best friend Sarah."
"The love I get from my girls."
"My girlfriends, definitely. Oh, wipe that look off your face, James, we're not lesbians, for the last time."
"Is my entire life a LIE?" James vented later in the common room to Lily.
Still shaking her head at his absurdity, Lily still assured him, "I'm sorry. It's just a fact of life. I'll try to even out the love between you and the girls."
"Thank you," James sighed, relieved. "I'm going down to dinner; coming?"
Lily shook her head. "I'm waiting until Alice's Ancient Runes class is over."
James kissed her quickly before leaving, and when he turned to go, Alice was climbing through the portrait hole.
"ALLIE!" Lily squealed. "I've missed you!" The two girls darted to each other and enveloped the other in an enormous hug, soon joined by Nancy, positively flying down the girls' stairs and careening into the other two so that they fell to the floor in a shrieking heap.
James locked eyes with Lily, who immediately looked ashamed. "Too much?"
All the girls out there with me? You know it's true.