You'll Be Here, Part 1 of 2
Pairing: nothing overt, aside from some speculating by Frost and Korsak, but if pushed, I'd say Jane/Maura
Spoilers: Up through "The Beast In Me"
Disclaimer: The only thing that's mine is the plot, such as it is.
Notes: This is both a missing scene and a post-ep story for "The Beast In Me." As such, I wasn't kidding up there in the spoiler warning. Also, the title comes from an Idina Menzel song called "Here."
She clutched her phone tightly in her hand as she fled to her car; the volume rocker was pressing deeply and painfully into the still-tender area of her palm around the scar there, but for once, she didn't mind. Instead, she used the pain to focus her mind and keep herself from completely losing control.
In the elevator, she stared at the recent calls list, focused on the entry that said "blocked caller" – her proof that she hadn't imagined the phone call, her reassurance that she wasn't rushing home to an empty apartment.
Absurdly, the only conscious thought going through her mind as she lifted the phone to her ears was that she hoped the guys couldn't see her hands shaking.
Just about all of her hostage negotiation training deserted her as soon as she opened her mouth, and she blurted, "Whatever you want, I can get it."
There was no verbal response from the other side of the line, but she heard a shaky intake of breath and a sound that might have been a sob.
Her heart thudded painfully in her chest. She thought – thought – she recognized something about….
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw both Frost and Korsak jerk into full alertness.
She didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Instinctively, she turned away from the guys in case she was about to do the latter.
"Y-you okay?" Part of her was morbidly wondering when she'd developed a stutter.
"I've been better. Did I wake you?"
She glanced at Korsak and Frost for guidance and found none. "Uh, no. Can – can you get to my apartment?"
She could just faintly hear Maura sigh. "I'm sitting outside."
She later realized that she could have asked why Maura hadn't come straight to headquarters or gone to her own house, but she hadn't.
Because there was really only one answer she could give. "I'll – I'll be right there."
She'd sprinted through the parking garage, so it was only when she was opening her car door that she realized it was quite cold and grabbed a jacket from her trunk.
She fought it so hard she could hear her molars grind together, but two blocks south of headquarters, she had to bow to the inevitable and pull to the side of the road. She hit the steering wheel in frustration, then hit it again when the first hot tears spilled down her cheeks.
She'd spent hours certain that the next call she would receive would be from a beat cop or the coroner; that she'd have to go identify the body of her best friend.
That she'd see her lying lifeless, in her own morgue, with an ice pick sticking out of her ridiculously awesome brain.
That she'd have to stand witness as some other M.E. did the autopsy – because witness it she would; she owed Maura that at the very least.
That she'd stand with Maura's parents at her grave site, having bought or conned or begged half the police force to show up for her, because damned if Maura was going to be as alone in death as she was in life.
She finally wiped her eyes, rubbed her face, and tried to concentrate on driving, but her body was on autopilot and it wasn't until she saw Maura sitting on her front stoop, shivering in the chill air, that it all became real and she was able to breathe a sigh of relief.
Her tires squealed as she parked haphazardly behind Marissa's Honda, jumping out of the car and slamming the door closed behind her.
She half-ran to the stairs and then skidded to a halt, a knot forming in her stomach when she saw the lost, lonely look on Maura's face.
She knelt before her friend, shoving her own emotions to the side in favor of this real need in front of her.
"Maura?" she said softly, gently. "Hey?"
Slowly, her eyes came around and locked with Jane's. Her chin began to tremble.
"Maura…sweetie, come inside. Please?"
She swallowed hard, and then her teeth began to chatter. "I – I was so scared."
So we're gonna do this here. Damn.
She slipped out of her coat and wrapped it around her friend, then folded her hands around Maura's. "You're safe. It'll be okay."
"He wasn't – he – "
"Was it your – was it Doyle?"
She nodded jerkily.
Her eyes fell on thin red abrasions on Maura's wrists. Something in her stomach began to burn. "Did he hurt you?"
She rubbed her finger across one of the bruises; she thought she recognized it as a zip tie, but wasn't sure. The burning anger began to spread; she felt her face flush with it and did her best to keep it out of her eyes.
She turned her wrist over and traced the rest of the bruise, then looked up and met her friend's eyes. More firmly, she asked, "Maura? Did he hurt you?"
Jane stared at her.
Maura was lying.
Maura didn't – couldn't – lie.
She couldn't reconcile the two until she realized what it had to be: Doyle might not have hurt her directly, but someone certainly had.
She pulled her hands out from under Jane's and rubbed her wrists. "I almost forgot your number," she said.
Any thought she might have had about pursuing the matter of the bruises vanished.
Maura never forgot anything.
She pushed Maura's hair back behind her ears, trying to regain eye contact. "It's okay," she said soothingly, forcing herself to think about something other than beating the crap out of the bastard, even if it would land the entire Irish mob after her. That could wait. "You remembered."
"He wouldn't – wouldn't let me call 911. They could…track where I was."
"It's okay. You got me. I'm here."
Maura's eyes began to well with tears. "He drove me…oh, for half an hour or so…he dropped me off at a Starbucks in Somerville, so no one I knew would see the car. I – the cab…. My purse is at the office."
Only then did she notice the taxi sitting patiently across the street. "Hey, it's okay, I got it." She jogged over and shoved a few bills into the driver's hand. "Keep the change," she said, already heading towards Maura's shivering form.
"Lady, this isn't…."
She stopped, turned, and flashed her badge with a glare.
"Whatever," he grumbled, flying down the street in a squeal of tires.
Jane knelt next to Maura again. "All taken care of."
"I didn't – I don't have anybody else nearby that I could call. If I couldn't remember your number…."
Jane sat down hard on the step; she'd never realized, in quite such a visceral way, how alone she really felt. How alone she was.
She said the first thing that popped into her head: "I gotta get you a damn key."
Distracted, Maura frowned with something approaching her usual sharp intelligence. "What?"
"'Least you wouldn't be sitting out here in the cold, waiting for me."
Maura sighed and slumped against Jane, shivering. "I don't think I'd have thought to use one if I had it. I'm not thinking straight."
"Then let's go inside," Jane suggested, more forcefully this time. "Come on." She reached around Maura and hauled her to her feet.
She left her arm there as she led her friend inside.
At first, she settled Maura on the couch. "Here," she said, wrapping her in an afghan. "Warm up a little." She sat facing her friend, watching her carefully.
Maura would not meet her eyes. She was staring off somewhere in the distance, absentmindedly petting Jo Friday, who had jumped up and immediately snuggled up on her lap.
"You wanna tell me what happened?"
Maura glanced at her briefly, but then her eyes darted skittishly away.
"I…well, I yelled at him."
Despite herself, she grinned. "You did?"
She smiled slightly. "I remembered what you said once, about Hoyt? About how letting him see that you were afraid…"
"…gave him power. I remember." She sighed. "So you were scared out of your mind and yellin' at your biological dad."
"What did he want?"
She sighed. "I – I don't know, really." Her stomach rumbled and she winced, embarrassed. "I know what he said he wanted."
Jane, on the other hand, frowned. "When's the last time you ate?"
"What time is it now?"
"About eighteen hours ago."
Jane sighed. "I…I've got Lucky Charms. That's about it." She stood and headed for the kitchen. "I'll get you some while you tell me what happened."
"Thank you," Maura said as she followed Jane to the kitchen.
Jane poured some cereal into a bowl. "So, what was he like?"
Maura sighed and watched as her friend went to get some milk. "He had a gentleness I – I wasn't expecting."