I do NOT own P.S. I Love You
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Holly didn't sleep the night before. She was too worried about Gerry, how he would wake up in the middle of the night from a fit of coughing or migraines. Instead she watched him sleep next to her, it wasn't peaceful but at least it would help. At least she hope it would. The brain tumor had grown, and tomorrow he was to have surgery. There was a possibility that he wouldn't pull through, that he could die...She winced at the very thought. His body was turned to her, she looked at every feature of his face through the darkness as the alarm clicked through each second. She had already memorized his face but there would never come a time where she would stop trying to do it more so.
She felt a heart wrenching pain as she looked at the paleness of his face, the hair loss, the weight loss, it was depressing. She remembered that man she fell in love with who worked out, went to his job and still came home happy. She regretted ever saying anything disrespectful to him. The fights she had caused over things that didn't matter, it all seems so stupid now. If she lost him...no. She couldn't think about that. She wouldn't. Yet as every minute grew closer to 6am, she began to worry more. Then she remembered that this could be the last day she slept next to him. The tears poured down her face, taking a pillow to stifle the sounds of her cries, hoping she would not wake him. The pillow soon became tear stained, soaked from them.
Gerry then woke, he bent over coughing, Holly quickly put her arm on his back as he let it all out. Before he could see, she wiped her eyes and put the pilllow behind her. When he was finished, he looked up at her, his eyes glossy but he smiled ever so happy. "Holly." His accent was beautiful, deep yet so entrancing but now weak from the sickness, she held back the now lump in her throat. "Darling," he placed a shaking hand upon her cheek, stroking his thumb under her eye. "Why are you crying?"
She shook her head ever so lightly, "I...I wasn't crying." Her voice cracked between words, "I sneezed that's all." Gerry gave her a kind smile at her attempt to fool him, letting out a small chuckle.
"Aye Holly don't think I know when your were crying now? Come here." He held out his arms to her, she snuggled in, his chin resting on her head, arms wrapped around her. "Darling it will be fine. I will be fine. Nothing is going to happen Holly. We Irish men don't go down easily you know?" Holly had to let out a small laugh at his humor. She was amazed by him, always acting so strong when his body made him so weak.
For the remained of the hours instead of sleeping, they talked, laughed, shared and loved one another, both knowing that this could be the end. The alarm went off and Holly flinched. Gerry stroked her hair and kissed her on the forehead, "Believe me Holly, everything will be fine. You know how I know?" She shook her head, "Because I love you." She smiled and kissed him, neither wanted to get up but this could save his life. She sighed and began to get up, helping him stand and dress. She cared little about her appearance as she threw on some clothes and no makeup, knowing that it would take too much time.
They were out the door within the hour, hailing a taxi as Gerry looked around remembering every precious memory. She had seen him looking around their apartment as she got ready, it broke her heart knowing that he had to even consider doing such a thing. In the taxi they spent every minute looking at one another, hand-in-hand. The ride seemed short as the approached the hospital. Holly felt her nerves escalate at the very sight of the building. Gerry took in a deep breath, closing his eyes and praying for everything to go right and if not, that Holly be forever happy.
Once in the building Holly felt as if everything was sped up around her, not wanting the time to go so quickly, she took her time up to the information desk finding out where Gerry was to be taken. Holly didn't notice her surroundings, she didn't notice that all of her friends and family had shown up as well, sitting in the waiting room for them. She braved a smile at them but never taking her eyes off of Gerry, she felt detached from the world.
Gerry took each person aside, thanking them for being in his life, sending each and everyone into tears but not saying goodbye. When it was time for him to lay down in one of the rooms, he smiled at everyone, Holly coming with, all eyes filled with tears. "I'll be seeing you all soon!" The nurse who lead them into the room left once Gerry was laying down. They were to take him to the ER soon, she had these last few minutes with him before it all could end. He took his hands in hers and smiled, "Holly my dear Holly. I'm not saying goodbye, I'll be back here soon love. I know, I am fighting for you. That is what has been keeping me strong Hol. You, and I don't know where I'd be without you. The very sight of you takes my breath away, ever sense that day out on the road. Don't you remember?" She nodded, tears spilling down her eyes. "Your even more beautiful now. Oh that day Holly, that day our fate was sealed, we will never forget. I loved you right then and there. You taught me so much along the way, I can't thank you enough, not that it's over because it's not. I just don't know what I'd do without you."
Holly's voice came out in a whisper, "I don't know what I'd do without you either." Then they came in to take Gerry away, Holly stood in protest but Gerry's soothing voice stopped her.
"It's okay love." She didn't take her eyes off of him as he was being taken away out of the door, their hands departed and he let out one last call, "I love you Holly."
"I love you too Gerry." The tears came and came, never seeming to end. He was out of sight, she slowly dragged herself over to the waiting room where everyone waited, her mom embracing her as she entered the room. They sat, the tears fell and time slowly passed by. Her heart aching, her mind buzzing and the one thought going through her mind the entire time, "Will Gerry live?"