I am not Steve Franks. I own nothing of Psych. I just wanted a little drabble to spice up my Christmas vacation.
Shawn knew he had to do it. He and Juliet had been going out for too long for him not to admit it to her. It just wasn't fair to her. He just had to decide how to most gently break the news.
"Shawn, we were supposed to be down at the station 15 minutes ago. What have you been doing?" Gus demanded of his best friend.
"Sorry buddy, I just lost track of time." Shawn knew that he couldn't tell Gus the truth (as ironic as that was) because he would just try and talk Shawn out of it. But Shawn knew that he couldn't live this lie anymore. "I'll be right there."
"Well hurry up." Shawn followed Gus to his car and they headed over to the station.
"Mr. Spencer, Mr. Guster, we've just been given a case from the LAPD. A body was found in the streets there, and they've identified the victim as Katharine Murphy, a Santa Barbara resident. So they've given the case to us. I need you to help us figure out who killed her so that we don't have to go down to Los Angeles to investigate if necessary," Chief Vick laid down her orders for the case.
"Unfortunately Chief, I have to be in the vicinity of things, especially the murder scene. So I believe that I will have to go to LA. I need to smell things, see famous people, and eat expensive food; I need to get inside the victim, the murderer, and quite possibly Penelope Cruz's head," Shawn replied with his own demands.
"Fine. You'll accompany Dectective O'Hara down there to retrieve the case files and begin your own investigation," the Chief conceded easily.
"Oh, sure. That sounds great." Shawn was put off slightly by how easily the Chief let him get his way. But he was more concerned by the fact that he would be alone in a car with Jules for several hours. Then he got one of his "brilliant" ideas. "Pack your bags Gus, we're going on a road trip.
"No! No way Shawn. I am a week and a half beyond on my route because of your adventure to the "candle burning fair" in Carpinteria."
"Gus, the scented candle portion was like being in a warm kitchen with fresh pie, gingerbread, AND a Christmas tree!"
Gus turned around quickly and walked away, leaving Shawn standing alone in the station hallway.
"Ready to go Shawn?" Juliet asked, grabbing her keys and heading for the exit.
"I'm as ready as a hummingbird with a sweet tooth," Shawn replied with a (patent pending) clichéd response.
Shawn slid into the passenger seat and began fiddling with the radio before Juliet even pulled out of the parking lot. He found his favorite 80s station and rocked out.
"Shawn, what are you avoiding?" Juliet asked.
"What? What are you talking about?" Shawn's voice was an octave and a half higher than normal.
"Shawn, I've know you long enough I can tell when you're avoiding something. What is it?" Juliet stared at Shawn with great intensity.
"Ooh, labradoodle!" Shawn pointed out the window.
"You know Shawn, we have a long trip. Let's not make this awkward. You know you can tell me anything," Juliet said.
Shawn began messing with the radio again, trying to think of a way to change the subject.
"Well, if you won't talk, I will. I was thinking that we should spend a few days in LA. I'll still be working the case so I don't have to worry about work. That way you can do some investigating of your own. I'm interested to see how you solve this case." Juliet gave Shawn a knowing look.
"Well, I think I can do just fine. I am a great detective after all."
Juliet rolled her eyes at Shawn's pride. "If you were such a great detective, you would have known that I couldn't eat the poppy seed muffin you gave me this morning because I'm allergic."
"Since I was 5," Juliet said matter-of-factly.
"Well, I'm sorry that I was never even given clues that you're allergic."
Juliet didn't reply to that.
"Jules, are you doubting my detective skills?" Shawn asked.
"I'm not completely convinced all the time," Juliet said quietly.
They rode a little ways in silence, Shawn trying to decide if this was the right time to tell her. He knew that the longer he took, the more suspicious she would get about what he was hiding. Plus, she'd already given him a chance to come clean.
"Juliet, I have to tell you the truth. This is hard for me to say. You may already suspect, but I have to come clean."
"Shawn, just spit it out. What is it?"
"I…I can't actually bowl."
A/N: This confession was inspired by season 1's episode "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not, Oops He's Dead" where Juliet says that she wouldn't date someone who can't bowl. Also inspired by Weird Al Yankovic's parody of Usher's "Confessions" because of the crazy confessions included in it.
A/N 2: Juliet is supposed to know already that Shawn isn't psychic. I don't know if that came across.