We Should Have Just Played Scrabble
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from glee. I do not own any of the books, TV programmes or movies mentioned in this strory. Nor Jenga.
AN: Okay, so this is my Christmas present to you guys, because Christmas wouldn't be Christmas without a game of charades! This is focussed around an established Puckleberry relationship, though mentions an established Quill relationship a couple of brief times (if you're at all interested, I was kinda imagining my story 'curiosity killed the cat' as a background, but basically, Quinn is pregnant with Will's baby).
Also, this is very silly. And random. But hopefully fun :)
It was the 23rd of December and the McKinley high glee club were round at Will's apartment for, as he had called it, 'some silly Christmas games', accompanied by non-alcoholic mulled apple juice and home-baked mince pies.
It was Rachel's turn to pick a game.
"We are going to play charades", she announced, placing the box of cards on the carpet beside the Christmas tree.
"I am- legit- a fucking ninja at charades", Puck announced confidently. "Watch and learn from the master".
"Count me out", Quinn sighed shifting slightly on Will as she lay on the couch with him. "I'll watch…"
"Me too", Will added, content to lie there comfortably with his pregnant girlfriend.
"I'm first", Finn decided.
"How are you first?" Rachel asked crossly, "It's my game, I should go first!"
"Because I'm bigger?" Finn tried hopefully. "Plus I totally won at Jenga".
"I was distracted!" Puck retorted, "Rach was all bending over and shit to pick up the candy cane… I blame that skirt!"
"I'll go first", Kurt cut in, "To save arguments".
"Even if I'm not playing- can I still guess?" Quinn asked, as Kurt read his card and rearranged his hair in preparation.
"I'll take your goes", Santana said brightly. "Don't look at me like that- I love this game…"
"Hey you guys- I've already started and none of you are watching!" Kurt complained.
"It's a movie!"
Kurt then proceeded to undergo an inward struggle of morals, looking about him desperately for inspiration.
He pointed at Quinn.
"Pregnant!" Puck said triumphantly.
Santana made a face. "Yes. Because that's a name of a film".
Puck thought about this for a second. "That film with Lindsey Lohan being pregnant!"
Kurt shook his head furiously.
"You are on completely the wrong lines", he supplied helpfully. "It's more about what Quinn reminds you of".
"A whale?" Rachel asked.
"Hey!" Quinn exclaimed.
Kurt sighed. "Mr Schue, please don't judge me for doing this… now Finn, you should definitely get this…"
He undid the zipper of his jeans.
"Free Willy!" Finn yelled.
"I can't believe you were implying that I looked like a whale", Quinn muttered, and Will kissed the top of her head in reassurance.
"My turn!" Finn said, with childlike enthusiasm.
"It's a movie…"
"Erm…dancing… dirty dancing?" Tina suggested.
Will laughed. "Even Finn can dance better than that".
"Epilepsy", Brittany spoke up.
Finn waved his arms around with increased intensity.
"Mamma Mia?" Artie tried, "Is this more your reaction to watching the film? Because I definitely did something like that when Pierce Brosnan started singing…"
Finn was now twitching with manic effort.
"I think he's having a fit", Rachel said worriedly, pulling free of Puck's embrace. "Maybe it was the flashing lights when we played 'musical turning off the lights statues' earlier?"
"Bit of a delayed reaction", Puck grumbled, but mainly because his pint sized snuggly radiator had moved. "Leave him Rach, if he blacks out, then we'll call an ambulance".
"Don't worry, I'm first aid trained", Mike announced, jumping up and rolling up his sleeves.
"I'm not having a fit", Finn said, "There's something wrong with my arm!"
"Do you have tingling sensations running from your shoulder to fingers?" Mike asked seriously. "Can you feel it if I do this…"
"OW! What the hell was that for! I'm not hurt! Well, I am now… There is something metaphorically wrong with my arm".
"Finding Nemo?", Will suggested.
"Damn", Santana said. "I wanted to see how long he was going to lay on the floor like that".
"You can take my turn Santana", Will said.
"Schue can I get more chips?" Puck asked.
"Sure… there in the second cupboard as you walk into the kitchen".
"The mince pies are great by the way", Tina said politely. "Who made them".
"We did", Quinn replied. "Well, Will decorated them…"
"The icing's the best bit", Mike grinned.
Puck returned. "Found them. Also found a box of condoms, really random place to keep condoms…"
"Ah! That's where I put them", Will replied.
"But she's pregnant", Puck pointed out, obviously. "Surely you can just bang whenever you want".
Quinn laughed as Will squirmed a bit under Puck's frowning gaze.
But then Puck realised what he had just said.
"Hey Rach… so when do you wanna have kids?"
Rachel spluttered, mulled apple juice going everywhere.
"Oy! Bitches! I'm not just here to look hot you know", Santana called their attention, putting a stop to the family planning conversation.
"A TV show".
Santana then proceded to catch Brittany's attention with a frantic wave, and then clasped her hands as claws and linked them.
"Friends", Brittany said, as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"Puck can have my go", she continued, "I don't understand the rules".
"Get ready to be amazed at my pure awesomeness", Puck smirked, swaggering to stand in front of the Christmas tree.
"It's a book".
"Rach- I need you for this one… No it's alright- just stay there, and maybe put your slippers on your knees…"
He pointed at her, waiting patiently as suggestions flew at him.
"Harry Potter?" Finn asked.
"How is that Harry Potter?" Kurt asked him incredulously.
"She's like a dwarf or something…" he trailed off under Rachel's icy glare.
"That's the kinda thinkin' we need", Puck said. "Babe, don't worry, you maybe tiny but you totally make up for it in so many ways".
Rachel was quiet, unsure whether to take this as a compliment or not.
"Thumbelina?" Artie suggested.
"Lord of the Rings!" Rachel cried out. "I'm a hobbit".
Mike snorted with laughter and Rachel pushed him.
"Fuck off Chang- plus- babe, you're totally hotter than a hobbit- they have hairy feet and that's-like- a total turn off for me".
She decided that that was a compliment, and kissed him briefly before taking her turn.
"It's a movie".
The others watched, enraptured, as she proceeded to dance around in front of the Christmas tree, her arms outstretched and her mouth opened wide in silent song.
There was an awkward silence.
Rachel huffed. "Oh come on! You got Friends from some mimed lobster claws!"
"Ohhhh- that's what that was", Will said, realising.
"Okay… Try this- Right- imagine I'm running down a hill".
She repeated her mime, but this time moved over to Puck and surprised him with a passionate kiss, tilting his head up to hers.
"Sound of Music!" Mike called out, and then blushed with embarrassment when everyone turned to him in disbelief.
"What? My mum likes it!"
"God you two- get a room!" Santana grumbled. "It's bad enough with the nauseatingly cute couple on the couch!"
She pushed Rachel so that she fell off balance into Puck, but this did nothing to discourage them.
Finn laughed. "How on earth did you get that Chang? From Rach 'running down a hill' and then eating Puck's face off".
Rachel, slightly breathless, gave a haughty reply.
"Well, Finn, it was obviously because of my superior acting skills".
"She was being Maria", Mike explained patiently, "Singing and running around on hills… and then marrying that Von Trapp bloke with all the kids".
"You're a girl Chang. A big girl."
Needing air again, Rachel offered some consolation. "I couldn't exactly mime all 7 of the Von Trapp children now could I? Even if Quinn gave birth right now I would still be 6 down!"
"6", Puck breathed, almost in awe. "That means you would have to be, like, constantly pregnant... and that means…"
"It's my turn", Mike interrupted.
Several minutes later…
Will looked around, he was in fact, the only one still watching Mike's enthusiastic dance interpretation of… well, he couldn't actually tell what he was trying to mime…
Brittany had probably been asleep for a while now, and he couldn't tell who out of the glee club were just resting, and who was actually asleep.
But he kept his eyes glued to the guy popping and locking in front of him, because he was slightly worried about the fates of the furniture, if Mike just missed a landing it could all go horribly wrong.
Some time later...
Puck opened an eye to see that Mike was still dancing.
This guy was insane.
Rachel was the one to coincidentally open her eyes just as Mike finished his performance, and she hastily pulled her hands from Puck's to offer the poor guy some applause.
This stirred the rest of the glee club into action, and they made up for their lack of attentiveness with the enthusiasm of their cheering and clapping.
"So what was that?" Santana asked bluntly, because no one else seemed to want to.
Mike raised his eyebrows. "Pirates of the Caribbean", he replied.
"Yeah… Which one, again?" Artie questioned carefully.
Mike paused, frowning, and pulled the card out of his back pocket to check.
"Oh", he said, "Well, it was supposed to be Curse of the Black Pearl, but I was doing At World's End!"
"That must have been why we didn't get it", Rachel suggested.
There was a prolonged awkward silence.
"I think it's my game next", Quinn said brightly.
"Thank god", Puck muttered.
"Can't we play the one that's like charades but with the plasticine?" Brittany asked.
Rachel bit her lip thoughtfully.
"Maybe we should have just played scrabble".
Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays!
Please review :)