I wanted to write something dirty for you for Christmas, Vic. Because you're dirty you. Obviously. But I sat down with my focus intent on Catward, and... this is what came out. I hope you don't hate me after you read it. Cause that would kinda make me sad, seeing as how I love you so. ;)

These are all 100 each, except for the last which is double that.

Thanks and loving gropes to my Trevvy for beta-ing this, calming my freak-outs, and for the summary.

Disclaimer: Names and appearances and blah blah blah, don't belong to me. The writing, most definitely does. The idea of Edward owning a cat? That belongs to Britoria, heee.

Cats were awesome.

I loved cats.

The two I had were siblings, though you couldn't tell from looks.

Just their behavior toward each other.

I was destined to become a crazy old cat guy.

(Yeah yeah, I know I'm only seventeen, but my school doesn't have a drama club. I have to get it out somehow, don't I?)

Because, no matter how ridiculous it sounded, I'd rather be at home around my cats than spending time with any of the girls in my school.

Until, that is—as cliché as it totally was to admit—Bella Swan moved to town.