God, I'm so sorry you guys! There's no excuse for me having abandoned this for so long, it's just ridiculous. I suck as an authoress. Let me just say that this fic IS getting finished, come hell or high water. I can't apologize enough! Please be gentle!
It's, er, really, REALLY stupid, I'm aware. I was pretty intoxicated for over half the thing, LOL but it's better than nothing. I'll try to get the rest churned out soon but I've been more than a little preoccupied. Sorry guys. Three words; 'Shitty. Ass. Breakup.'
((By the way, the song Chrystal is playing is 'Behind Closed Doors' by Rise Against. Kickass song. Go look it up!))
"How was I supposed to know that cops were so sensitive about the donut thing?" Dean asked me, shrugging innocently like a ten-year old who had been caught swapping the salt with the sugar. I just put my hand over the receiver and called my friend a few less-than kind words before I looked back up through the glass to meet his patent 'whatcha-gonna-do' stare. Yes, the dumbass had ended up in jail again. Since I was with him, but not arrested, they let him talk to me after some 'boobing' and pleading on my part. Pigs. (No pun intended.)
"Look, just play nice for a little bit and I'll go get Sam and figure this mess out. And try not to piss off everyone of some authority around here. I don't like them either, but everyone gets that you're the James Dean reincarnate, alright? So just shut your trap for a little while and try not to drop the soap." With that, I hung up the phone and gave a sweet smile and little wave in response to the single finger salute Dean was waving.
I grinned brightly as I slid into the Impala's driver seat for the first time. This was too good to be true! I was actually getting to drive the, what was it? Oh, yeah, 'Metallicar'! (The fans of 'Supernatural' come up with the craziest shit, don't they? Naming a car… Geez!)
I very carefully backed out of the parking lot and hit the road back to the motel. When I stopped being scared shitless of breaking the thing, I reached behind the seat and grabbed a small device that plugged into the car and placed my iPod in it. This thing was the dock that Sam had purchased. It was our little secret, and we only used it when Dean wasn't in the car, because he would go ballistic if he knew.
"Chests thrown and tables toppled, hands armed with broken bottles. Standing no chance to win but we're not running. We're not running… There's a point I think we're missin', it's in the air we raise our fists in and the smiles we cast each other. My sister, my brother…"
I blasted the music until I was fairly sure that everyone within a two-mile radius could identify the song and prayed that all the cops in the area were preoccupied with the murder scene (or my dumbass 'brother') because I was just BEGGING for a noise violation. And I was speeding a little, because I REALLY had to pee!
I pulled into the Bumfuck Quickie 8 or whatever the hell the name of this place was, and tracked down our room. I slid the automated card key into the lock a few times before it finally took and I slowly opened the door. Noticing that Sam was sitting at the computer with his back to me and earphones in, I walked very easily so as not to disturb him. Because if an unsuspecting Sam hears a loud noise, he's been known to go nuts. This can result in a major "OWW" factor for all involved. Even if you're just getting up in the middle of the night to get a drink. Yeah…
I slipped easily into the bathroom and got back out as quickly as I could, because Dean would NOT last long in jail without having to start some shape or form of shit with someone. I heard Sam talking and assumed he was on the phone with Bobby. I dried my hands and opened the door, stepping back onto the dirty carpet and looking up when I saw and heard things that I wasn't mentally ready for.
The sight of Sam, err… having a personal… wasn't really in itself a new thing to see. Not really all that pleasant, but, hey, when you're on the road with two guys all year round you get used to them, in the undying words of the great George Carlin, 'waxing their carrots'. What actually disturbed me were the voices coming from the computer. "I want you to R.A.M your hard drive into me baby! Ooh! Yeah!" What the hell?
As I stood in front of the door with a rather perplexed look on my face, Sam noticed that I was there and blushed deeply. Smirking, I looked away while he fixed his clothing and stood up but I quickly jumped at the computer before he could close the window.
I looked at the screen curiously. There was a woman lying on her back wearing a micro-mini office skirt, slightly unbuttoned top and heels, but she was also adorned with thick-rimmed glasses, a pocket protector, and held a vibrator that looked like… A microchip?
I laughed so hard that I literally doubled over and couldn't breathe. "Geek porn? REALLY Sam?" I laughed some more. "Better be careful you don't get a… VIRUS!" I finally started to calm down, but I then I looked at Sam. His facial mix of utter mortification, anger, and amusement was just too much for me to take and I collapsed into sobs of laughter on the bed. After a few more comments about 'memory sticks' and 'inserting' I was able to wipe my tears and catch my breath.
"Chrystal. If you breathe a WORD of this to Dean or Bobby," Sam said to me in a voice heavy with promises of severe physical injury. "I swear I will show them all those nasty little stories you write. Oh, I know about them." He said with a smirk. I immediately sobered up. That would be bad. Especially since he was a main feature in most of them.
"Fine. Truce." I held up my hands in surrender and bit my lips to fight back the giggles. He just rolled his big ole' brown eyes and blew an exasperated puff of air, a smile quirking the corner of his lips. I stood up from the bed and remembered why I had come back in the first place.
"Well, come on then Spock. Let's go get Captain Kirk out of the brig." I smirked and chuckled as I turned to walk away before I felt a heavy THWACK! on the back of my head. "Saaam!" I moaned. "Don't Gibbs slap me!"
"I meant what I said Chrys. I will print out those stories and post them everywhere." I nodded, open mouthed and it was his turn to smirk at me as he walked out. He stopped in the doorway and said "By the way, it's not smart to set your password as your favorite poem when your user icon is a 'Raven'." I stuck my tongue out and he laughed.
I chased after him. "I am NOT Sulu!"