AN: MDA, Amanda & Simon, post-series, drabble, don't own. I think You know the drill.


It's this strange combination of like the first time he's ever done this, and like he has always known exactly how to do this. When they're together he doesn't know quite what to do with his hands, fidgets like a teenager who's going to see a movie with a girl he likes but is too scared to touch her. But he does touch her – adult male Simon Lloyd touches flesh and blood Amanda McKay, a woman his teenage self could never have dreamed up in his most wild flights of fancy; and when he does touch her everything makes sense, not just his life, but everything. The greatest mysteries of the world fall apart before his eyes, become simple, and he could tackle them all; could solve the drought and the floods and the hole in the ozone layer and cure any disease anyone cared to name with a sweep of his hand, because the answers dance just before his eyes. Unfortunately for all the aforementioned causes, when he's touching her there's only one thought on his mind:


When he's touching her he doesn't feel like an inexperienced teenager. He lives and breathes her, he knows exactly what to do with his hands, his lips, somehow knew her in detail the first time he made contact with her. It's innate, a map of her body imprinted in his mind, waiting, latent, until he first made contact with her and it declared itself. Yes, when he touches her he is an expert, a specialist, a maestro; but then he breaks away from her and he's a teenager again, in love for the first time ever, incapable of expressing the enormity of his emotion.

He's only found one solution so far. He's sopped letting go of her.