"Greetings America, I'm Dick Clark, hosting the Ball Drop for the year 2000. It's forty three degrees in the Times Square and U2 is preparing for their performance as we speak…"
"Hey! Move outta the way, will ya?" demanded Hamm, grimacing at the dinosaur blocking the view to the television screen.
"Oh sorry!" he apologized, bustling away from the picture.
"D'ya think we'll see the Davises on T.V.?" the redhead eagerly asked, sitting with her legs crossed.
As the toys on the counter chatted among themselves in anticipation for midnight, Buzz Lightyear rubbed his hands together impatiently trying to keep himself awake on the bed. His cowboy counterpart drifted over to the semi-slumbering space toy with a grin. Pressing his red button placed on his back to activate his helmet, Woody covered his lips in restraining a laugh after the toy astronaut scowled.
"Woody!" he yelled, retracting his headpiece, "What was that for?"
"Hey, you gotta stay up with us this year," Woody defended, showing his both palms, "You promised."
"Let's try 2001, Woody, I'm too tired. I have had a long day. I had to organize today's meeting. I had to break up the verbal fight between Hamm and Mr. Potatohead during Battleship. I had to watch Mrs. Potatohead try on all her accessories and compliment her to make her feel good about herself. After all, she's going through postpartum depression with her new triples. I had to tame Buster and wash him after he dug in the mud in the backyard. I had fix the video game console for Rex. I had to do sound check with Mike for Wheezy's next performance. I had to make sure all the monkeys were in their barrel. I had to untangle Slinky after he chased his own tail. I had to help Bo Peep find her sheep. I had to ride BulIseye around he room after he begged me time after time. I had to sit patiently while the Barbies made me over and pretended that I was going to the prom with them. I had to change the batteries on Mr. Spell and review Etch's latest portrait. I had to test RC's remote. I had to help a certain cowboy find his hat again after he misplaced it for the umpteenth time. I'm tired. I'm exhausted. And I want to go to bed. Good night."
"Well," Woody said after a long hush, "I guess you won't stay up to do the New Year's tradition…." Rubbing his face while sighing, Buzz looked at Woody in disbelief.
"What, may I ask, is the New Year's tradition?" Woody rose his shoulders in a casual shrug.
"Oh nothing. I mean, you always missed it since you've fallen asleep before." Buzz's eye twitched.
"What. Is. It?" he demanded, clearly irritated by his friend's coyness.
"It's where you kiss whoever you want in the room of your choice."
"That's all?" The sheriff nodded his head delightedly as he crossed his arms. Buzz groaned as he plopped his body on the star-covered comforter. "Good night. Wake me up when it's 2000."
"I understand why you're tired, Buzz," Woody began, turning his body. "I mean you helped almost every toy here…except one."
"Who?" Buzz moaned in the pillow. He wasn't having it today.
"Jessie," Woody whispered, grinning ear-to-ear. "And I heard she's looking for a smoochin' partner to do the tradition." Buzz jolted up, his eyes wide. "I mean you could do the favor for her…"
"Wait!" Buzz called out, reaching an arm in front of his body. "What do you mean?"
"Oh c'mon Buzz! You're a smart toy."
"Y-you'd think she would want to…kiss me?"
"It isn't exactly unheard of, Buzz," Woody teased, rolling his eyes, "This is a very popular tradition practiced all over the world."
"If you stay up till midnight, you get to kiss her. Not hard is it? And you only have to wait-" he paused to look at the clock, "Two hours and nineteen minutes. Can ya survive till then, Lightbeer?"
"Watch me. I can stay up to infinity and beyond."
"OK, all bets in," Hamm announced, scanning the room to avoid Buzz. "For those who say he'll stay up, place your pieces here. For those who say he won't make it, place your bets here."
"This should be a double bet," Mr. Potatohead cut in, pointing to Jessie who was occupied at the television, "The first to see if he'll stay up and the second to see if he even kisses Lucille Ball of the west over there."
Meanwhile, Buzz stood nervously in front of the last toy-or lamp ornament- he thought he'd ask advice from.
"A girl loves a guy who makes the first move," Bo explained, twirling her staff, "But she also appreciates he to set up a situation for her to react."
"W-what do you mean by that?" Buzz questioned, looking over the shepherdess's shoulders and catching eye contact with the glaring cowboy.
"What I mean is you should approach her. Certainly you know how to approach a her, right?"
"Well," Buzz sheepishly murmured, "I could do better."
"The first step is admitting it," she consoled with a warm smile. Sitting down with her legs daggling over the window edge, she motioned him to sit next to her. "First, start out with a simple greeting."
"Greetings, Jessie," he exclaimed with a deep voice.
"She's not a viewer for your late-night television show, Buzz. Say a greeting that would make her comfortable." Bringing one knee up, Buzz leaned back with glee with animated arm motions.
"Howdy, Jessie! How d'ya do?"
"No, Buzz," Bo said, bring a finger up to her lips from a giggle escaping, "Be yourself."
"But if I'm myself, I'd stutter around her."
"OK! We'll just skip the hello and jump right into the conversation. What can you two talk about."
"Andy? That's you're idea of a romantic topic? Andy?"
"Well, what do you suggest?"
"Anything, ranger. Talk about how well-trained Bullseye is. Talk about the stars as cheesy as it sounds. Talk about her favorite T.V. show. Favorite movie. Music. Moment in history. Talk about Buster. Western life. Woody's Round-up. Her! Talk about her! Compliment her. Gaze into her eyes. Pretend something is on her face and remove it. Braid her hair. Ask her to pull her string."
"Should I talk about myself?"
"Got it," he affirmed, slightly shaken from the blonde's outburst.
"How are you going to kiss her?" Just hearing the word 'kiss' made the space ranger jittery.
"Well, I, uh…I'm not sure."
"Just wing it!" Bo urged. "If she looks from your lips to your eyes and leans in, she's willing to go for it. Plus, it's a new year tradition. She'd understand your motivation."
"Alright," Buzz gasped, "Here it goes." At first, he hesitated and bumped his knuckles anxiously together. Then, he lurched his body rapidly towards Bo, causing her to recoil quickly.
"What are you doing?" she demanded. Buzz's mouth dropped open, afraid she took offense to his action.
"I-I'm sorry, I thought we were actually gonna-"
"You can't just dive into her face!" Bo protested, unfazed and unaware of Buzz's mental self-blaming. "We have noses! You know that? I think she's prefer to keep hers straight."
"I-I didn't m-mean-" He immediately closed his jaw as he felt her fingers on his cheek.
"You want to make her feel safe," she explain, caressing the side of his face. "She's the only girl in your life. Have her realize that." She moved her hand to his chin. "Pull her in and-" She paused for a second. "Oh who am I kidding. She'll probably pounce on you anyway," she commented, pushing herself to a standing position. "Good luck, Lightyear!"
"Uh, thank you?" he mumbled in bewilderment. Now what?
"H-hello, Jessie," Buzz stammered, moving towards the redhead who was engrossed by the performance on the T.V.
"Howdy…" she muttered mindlessly.
"So…What movies do you like?"
"What about 'em?"
"Which ones do you like?"
"Which ones of what do I like?
"Uh," he stumbled, playing with his fingers, "You have the most beautiful…hands."
"Hands? Is that a movie?"
"No. I mean yours are."
"Mine are what?"
"Your h-hands. They're beautiful."
"That's nice, Buzz." The space toy looked over to Woody who was giving him a thumbs up.
"You have something in your hair," Buzz pointed out, reaching his arm to her face.
"What're you doin', Buzz?" she asked, facing him.
"There's something on your cheek, Jessie. Let me get it off for you."
"Wait, Buzz-" Swatting him away, she accidentally hit his arm towards her eye. "Ow! What was that for?"
"I-I didn't mean to do anything. You h-hit my arm and-"
"Now you're blamin' me for an injury you caused? You were the one who came ov'r here and started to wave your arm in my face…"
"I-I'm sorry, there was something on y-your cheek-"
"Just leave it Buzz!" she commanded, moving his arm away again as she held her arm. The sound of the T.V. filled their silence.
"So," Buzz began, "Do you like horses?"
"Buzz! Buzz!" Woody bellowed, gently slapping his friend's face, "Wake up!"
"Huh?" Buzz groaned, drifting in and out of sleep.
"You're falling asleep! Snap out of it!" Buzz planting his feet on the ground, Buzz lazily sauntered over to a glass of water.
"Don' wurr-eh Woo-ey," Buzz slurred, sticking his arm in the water, "I haff this awl unner controh…"
"Buzz what are you doing?"
"I'm gonna wayg myself uhp by stigging muh arm ihn thuh wa-er tuh send an elegric shog through muh bah-ee."
"From what I understand, you're going to shock yourself to stay up by sticking your arm in that water?"
"Buzz isn't that a little dangerous?"
"AHHHHHHHH!" he shouted, his body jarring each way. The sheriff cupped his hand over his mouth as his eyes grow wide.
"Everybody!" Woody announced, "Gather around! Grab the confetti! Get the horns! Five minutes till the ball drop!"
"Hey, where's Buzz?" Slinky questioned. As the group of toys searched for the astronaut from the counter, they found him in fetal position on the bed.
"Oh it's no use, guys," Woody sighed, "I tried everything to keep him up. It's just another new year he missed…"
Counting down, the toys each found their kissing partners. Bo with Woody, Mr. Potatohead with the missus, and the rest received a kiss on the cheek from a Barbie. Jessie, however, furrowed her eyebrows at the space ranger. Jumping down from the counter without anybody detecting, she crawled onto the bed and met with the snoozing toy. Studying him, she watched him flip on the other side, facing her. She examined his face; she wasn't use to seeing his expression so vulnerable. His usual alert blue eyes that always seemed to dart the room were covered by his eyelids. His mouth was slightly ajar, a contrast to his standard clenched jaw. His fingers flickered back and forth as his eyebrows drew together. The touch of her hand relaxed him; his body sunk into the comforter. Sliding her body by his torso, she turned back to the toys, partying without noticing her nonexistence. Facing Buzz again, she cradled his face his her hands. Leaning down, she gently pressed her lips against his and pulled away. A small grin appeared and vanished on his face as he curled his body more. All the sounds around her seemed to echo as the surroundings around her faded. Shaking her head to snap out of her daze, she removed herself and joined the rest of the toys, saying a farewell "Happy New Year".
Yeah I know, the ending was too mushy. Oh well. Thank you for reading and have an awesome New Year! (And I don't want to get any flames about the Bo and Buzz scene. It was just a little comedic relief. I don't mean anything by it. Nothing romantic about it. Not. One. Thing.)