As the nights grow on and days become longer, your presence begins to fade. Everything that used to remind me of you is bleaching into nothingness. The way the summer breeze moved your hair so calm and silent, has now turned to a violent hailstorm and the way the sun glittered teasingly on your chest has now paled to a dull light high in the sky.
I find that I try to remember you to much and I get so enveloped in you that I forget my way. I lie in bed some evenings trying to remember how your hand felt in mine or how my skin tingled as you brushed hair from my face. Sometimes at night, I still gaze longingly into the sky, staring at the moon and wondering if you are thinking of me. But I always remember what you told me: no mater where you are in the world, the moon is no bigger than your thumb nail. And as I remember this, I smile to myself and I can hear your deep, musky voice, as a soft echo in my head.
But John, I feel I am forever longing our presence, I miss you, I miss us. Its so hard to get through a day without thinking about you. I tested myself, once, to see if I could do it, to see if I could try to forget for just a moment. But, I think I knew right from the very start that it was impossible to even consider not thinking of you.
There is no man, John, that will make me forget about you. For you claimed my heart so quickly and I, yours that we barely knew what had happened before it was to late. We were young and finding our way in the world when we found each other. Maybe we fell to quickly and tripped. Though I know if I could turn back time, I wouldn't change a thing for the world. Because a life without you in it is simply unimaginable.
I can't control the future, but I just want you to know, always, that i'll be forever waiting for you, beseeching your touch, your smile, your scent and the endless tidal wave of your eyes.
All my heart...