Ok, I cannot get this out of my head. This is just gonna be a oneshot, hitting two birds with one stone: getting this storyline out of my system, and explaining why Max is never involved in any of the House of Mouse craziness or the staff meetings.

I do not own House of Mouse or The Lion King. They belong to Disney.

I have seen many a traumatizing thing in my life: Bigfoot, my dad showing up at my college in a tacky 1970's outfit...

But all the traumatizing scenarios are nothing compared to what I experienced tonight.

So I was hanging out in the parking garage trying not to fall asleep when I decided to go around to the front of the club to make sure an angry mob wasn't forming when I wasn't there to pick up their cars. Lucky for me, no one was there. I decided to hang out in the front for a while, but later regretted it.

The door slammed open, and a dark brown lion with a black matted mane, and a scar on his left eye walked out after a pale brownish golden lioness with green eyes. I recognized them as Scar and Nala.

The two lions seemed to be arguing.

"What the hell are you doing here, Scar? You have a lot of nerve-"

"My dear, I merely came to enjoy the show."Scar smirked.

Nala continued to glare at Scar with hatred beyond what I've seen or experienced. "You stay away from me and Simba. You hear me? You've caused enough trouble!"

"Believe me, I have no intention on bothering that nephew of mine." Scar said casually. He then smiled at Nala in kind of a creepy way. "You, however..."

Nala backed away into the wall with a flicker of fear in her eyes. She swallowed. "Don't."

"But why? I would've made an excellent king to your queen."Scar padded up to Nala and nuzzled her (Was that a lion-style kiss?)

Nala gasped in horror and pushed Scar off her. "You pervert!"

I was starting to put the puzzler together. Scar was going to...rape Nala! I had to stop it!

...But how? Nala was now struggling under Scar and trying not to scream. Why wasn't she screaming? Not a second went by when Nala roared loudly.

...There we go.

Suddenly, Donald burst outside. Hey, what's the big idea?" He looked around and quacked in alarm at Scar and Nala. He looked around and saw me. "Max, go get Simba. Now!"

I obeyed immediately. I ran through the club ignoring Minnie's and Daisy's puzzled cries, and looked around frantically in the showroom for Simba.


I turned to see my dad walking towards me, slightly concerned.,

"Dad!" I exclaim. I ran to him and grabbed his shoulders. "Quick! Where's Simba?"

"Uh..." He looked around before spotting Simba at a nearby table. "There he is! Why do you need-"

"No time to explain!" I called over my shoulder as I ran to Simba. "Saimba! It's an emergency!"

Simba turned towards me raising a confused eyebrow. "Shouldn't you go to Mickey about this?"

"It's your wife. She's being raped by Scar!" I exclaimed.

Simba went pale. Then his expression changed to fury. "WHAT?" Guests at surrounding tables turned to us. "Where are they?"

"They're out front." I replied. Simba leaped from his chair and tore out of the show room. I sighed and called Mickey. "Mickey, we have a problem..." After I briefly explained what was going on, I ran outside to see Scar on top of Nala, who was on her stomach. I felt a pair of hands cover my eyes and jumped in surprise and pushed them off. I turned around...

"Dad!" I exclaim.

He was about to say something when Simba let out a sound between a roar and a scream. He tackled Scar off of Nala. They fought for a while as Minnie and Daisy collected Nala, and led her inside the club. Nala was whimpering and crying softly. God, I feel so bad for her. No one should go through that.

I turned my attention back to Scar and Simba, who were fighting savagely. Simba then proceeded to tear Scar's head off. I heard my dad gag in his mouth. Simba took a few breaths and turned to us, slightly embarrassed.

"Sorry you had to see that." He said.

"It's okay.," Mickey replied. "Gosh, I think I would've done the same thing. Just...don't let that happen again, okay?"

"I won't." Simba sighed and padded slowly into the club.

Mickey sighed and shook his head. Donald folded his arms and shook his.

"Gawrsh. That sure was intense." My dad spoke up.

"You can say that again." Donald replied.

"Well, let's just hope that nothing remotely like that ever happens again here." Mickey stated.

"Well, if it does, please leave me out of it." I said to all of them. "I've had enough drama to last a lifetime."

Mickey chuckled. "Deal."

From that night forward, the only drama I was involved in was being snowed in at the House of Mouse. And Salty the Seal was our only guest.

...And thank God.

...Yeah, I know. It was a little rushed. But it's to the point, right?