A/N Stephenie Meyer owns The Twilight Saga, its characters and everything else. I merely own the laptop on which I wrote this. This chapter is un-beta'd. I apologize in advance for any fuck-ups.

I should be enjoying San Antonio. The Riverwalk is quite nice and something I should be paying attention to, but I'm not. I should be enjoying this water taxi ride down the canal, but I just keep mulling over how Edward and I will soon part ways with Bella and then be on our own. It's impossible for me not to think about what Edward said in the pool yesterday, about his plans for us today when we're alone.

How will this play out later?

Is he gonna wait until tonight when it's time for bed? Or is he going to pounce on me the moment Bella leaves with her mother?

Does it matter?

Not really.

Our water journey is a bit of a struggle while I restrain myself from taking Edward's hand. Texas, after all, isn't the most gay-friendly state in America, so I have to be careful. Edward hasn't made any kind of move to change our positions, so I'm pretty sure he's being cautious about the same thing. It was only yesterday that we had the encounter with the gruff bigot of a man in the restroom in Tuscon—in our home state.

Around Emmett and Jacob, it's one thing to show my affection for Edward. Around strangers who could possibly take great offense to something as simple as handholding between two guys, though, I'm very nervous.

"You okay?" Edward asks.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Don't lie."

"I'm not lying. I'm just thinking."

"About what?"

"Stuuuuff," I drawl with a sideways glance.

I get a chuckle out of him which in turn triggers my own, and I'm grateful for the opportunity to dispel some nervous energy. Not only am I preoccupied with Edward's plans for later, but I'm concerned about how things will go down with Bella and her mother. The situation has the potential to be either very painful, or just painfully awkward.

And lunch time is rapidly approaching.

As it turns out, Bella's mother, Renee, is a trip.

I had no way of knowing if Bella's reunion with Renee was going to be joyous or tear-filled when we met up at the restaurant. I imagine now that asking Bella how she thought her mother would react would put much unneeded stress on her. Certainly, it's something she's already given plenty of thought to, though. A mother learning her daughter is pregnant, who then suddenly ups and leaves the state, only to come back home in the end, might not be considered a perfect situation. The potential for awkward was a very tangible thing.

I needn't not have worried, though. Things have gone better than expected so far. Even if their reunion hadn't been a combination of joy and tears, however, it would have been incredibly difficult to focus on them at all since are surroundings are more than distracting. The restaurant where we're having lunch is a jungle.

I really wish that was a euphemism.

We have already placed our drink orders and I'm pretty overwhelmed by the we're-not-even-gonna-try-to-deny-the-gimmick décor and rainforest theme of this eatery. I'm attempting to ignore the creepy animatronics taking place directly behind me in the form of a gorilla and a lion having a Tarzan-style shouting match, but despite how sweet it is to see the tears of happiness in Bella's mother's eyes when she hugs her daughter, I can't stop glancing at the thick, synthetic fur swinging around directly behind me.

And since there is simply not enough going on, there's a also fake thunderstorm. Of course.

It's been roughly twenty minutes now since we've placed our food orders, and I think I'm finally used to the cacophony of rainforest distrations when a rather loud clap of thunder rings out and I startle in my seat.

"Christ on a Slim Jim, are they trying to scare a better tip out of us?"

Bella's mom garners way too much delight from my outburst and laughs heartily as Bella covers her face and snorts.

"So, at what point in the pregnancy is a baby shower customary?" Edward asks.

"I'm guessing after the sex of the baby's been determined?" Bella suggests.

"Why would you do that?" Renee asks, a look of genuine surprise on her face.

"Do what? Find out what I'm having? Because I want to, and I'd like to know if I should start scoping out dresses or little pant suits."

"Really, Bella? Pandering to gender conformity already? Have I taught you nothing?"

"If I had been a boy, would you have put me in a dress just so I wouldn't be confirming to my gender?"


"Somehow, I wholeheartedly believe that," Edward says with a chuckle.

"Excuse me?" Renee asks with faux scorn.

Edward whistles and looks around the overwhelmingly obnoxious restaurant before noisily sipping his drink through his straw.

After a couple moments of silence—as silent as a situation can be when King Kong and Mufasa are duking it out—Edward adds, "I'd just like to be able to plan a trip that doesn't involve driving for hours on end."

"Oh!" Renee responds. "Baby showers are for the ladies. No boys allowed."

Edward raises an eyebrow. "What were we just saying about gender conformity? Would you like me to wear a skirt? A micro-mini leather number, perhaps?"

I look off to the side, not sure if that image is more intriguing or disturbing.

"That's different," Renee declares.

"It is? It basically sounds like if someone has a penis, they're not allowed at the baby shower."

"That's correct," Renee replies, stubborn.

"What if the baby's a boy? Are you going to make Bella leave the party?"

"That's hardly the same thing."

Edward turns to me. "That sounds like a triple standard, Jazz. What do you think?"

"Oh, I'm hugely offended," I answer, nodding.

Bella looks like she's trying not to pull something by holding in her laughter.

"You boys are impossible." Renee rolls her eyes.

"It comes with the gender," Edward says with a wink.

My knee hits the bottom of the table when Edward hooks one of his ankles around one of my own. He is the absolute picture of innocence, so I give him a good-natured elbow to the rib, and he laughs with his straw in his mouth.

Renee raises an eyebrow in a silent question to which Bella answers, "They're probably playing footsie. They're still in the honeymoon stage of their relationship."

I blink at Bella for several seconds before Renee says with all the grace of a fifteen-year-old, "Oh. My. God!"

My face fills with heat.

"I know, right?" Edward replies. "This Dr. Pepper is the shit!" Lowering his head, he takes a noisy slurp through his straw.

Renee leans across the table, and in a stage whisper that anyone within three tables' distance can hear, asks, "Are you two out of the closet yet?"

"Good grief, Mom! 1997 called. They want their caged-animal-curiosity back."

"Oh, stop it. It's a legitimate question."

This is starting to sounds like Rosalie all over again.

"Not exactly, Ms. Renee. I'm still peeking through the crack beneath the door, actually," I answer.

"Oh! Sorry!" She lowers her voice to a not-quite whisper again. "My bad."

"Okay, Mom? This particular conversation is over," Bella says, rolling her eyes.

When our food arrives, everyone digs in, either out of hunger—which I'm sure is true for Bella, since she's eating for two—or the desire to not break into more awkward conversation.

Everyone but me.

I take a couple bites of my burger and wash it down with sweet tea, only slightly amused at how Edward practically gags at the scent of my drink, but I really have no appetite for my food. We've made it through one stressful situation today basically unscathed, but there's still that little matter about my gay virginity that my sex-starved brain keeps returning to, and how it will be disappearing in a matter of hours—or less!—that still has me quite nervous.

Because the environment isn't overwhelming enough, a half-assed clown comes up to the table, wearing a bit of garish makeup but nothing else to indicate his profession. Nothing save for the fanny pack stuffed with balloons he's now manipulating into a poodle, and a monkey, and a palm tree, and a unicorn, and a sword… Edward and Renee laugh at the display, and all I can hear is the stretch and snap of the balloons before he inflates them, and they're prompting me to think about condoms. It's all I can do to not think about how the balloon hat suddenly resting ton my head thanks to Bozo the Unimpressive is quite possibly ribbed for her—his?—pleasure.

When the clown leaves after Renee stuffs a couple bills in the guy's apron, I smile and politely wave as I discreetly place my balloon hat on top of King Kong's head and wipe imaginary latex lube off my hands on the legs of my jeans.

"You okay?" Edward asks.

"Aces," I croak, excusing myself to escape to the restrooms.

One guy is drying his hands when I walk in and lean against the sink, and just as he leaves, Edward enters, approaching me slowly from behind, holding my gaze in the mirror.

"Have a clown phobia?" Edward asks, the corner of his mouth turning up just a little.

"First of all, that man has no business calling himself a clown. Second of all, I am not a coulrophobe."

Edward's eyebrows shoot up in disbelief.

"It means someone who has a fear of clowns."

"I kinda gathered that, Jasper," he notes with a smirk, sidling up closer to me. "I just didn't realize there was a scientific term for it. So, what's the problem? You barely touched your food." He props his chin on my shoulder and slides his arms around my waist, regarding my reflection in the mirror.

"I'm just distracted, I guess. Anxious."

"Bad anxious?"

I can't stop myself from nuzzling the side of his head like a cat.

"I'm kinda nervous."

His arms tighten around my waist.

"It's gonna hurt, isn't it?"

Edward's eyes flutter closed and he sighs against my shoulder before pressing his lips to my neck.

"I can't guarantee there will be zero pain involved. What I will do is everything within my power to help you relax, and make sure you know how very much I love you with every touch, every kiss." He emphasizes his point by brushing his lips just under my jaw and my shiver is automatic as the reflection of his bright green eyes flash at me in the mirror. "I'm not going to be conceited and say I'm gonna turn you on so good you'll forget your own name, but know this: It is my goal to make you rock hard, breathless, and incoherent. It's my plan to make your brain form the words, 'Fuck me, Edward,' and for your lips to struggle to form them."

My body is melting in his arms, and I kinda hate how just a few words have such a profound effect on me. I'm slumping in his embrace and it makes me uncomfortable with how he's so capable of making me feel vulnerable. It's a foreign feeling, and I almost envy Edward in his ability to do that.

There's something else that makes me anxious that I've been unwilling to acknowledge up until this point, though.

"What if I'm not what you expect? If I'm not as good as you're used to?"

Edward makes a sound of disbelief in his throat.

"It's a valid concern. Don't laugh at me," I say, frowning.

"I wasn't laughing," he replies, burying his face in my neck.

"I can count on both hands how many girls I've been with and still have a few fingers to spare. How does that compare with your numbers? What if I'm a mediocre or lousy lay?"

He scoffs. "My numbers…"

"Yeah, Edward. Your numbers. How many people have you had sex with?"

He gives my reflection a slow blink and a sigh. "Are we talking actual sexual contact, or what Bill Clinton defines as sexual contact?"

At that moment, the door swings open and Edward backs away from me, stepping to the side to unnecessarily wash his hands. I do the same, as the guy who came in uses the urinal.

Lowering my voice, I answer Edward's question. "The latter."

Edward vigorously scrubs his hands, pursing his lips in thought and bobbing his head minutely as he presumably checks off numbers in his head. As we both rinse, his eyes meet mine in the mirror and he smiles.


My expression shows my confusion.

"One what? One dozen? One hundred? One gross?"

"One. As in the number that comes before two. As in one point zero. As in one more than zero. As in, she's out there talking to her mother and that's it."

Edward dries his hands as I stand in front of the mirror, letting the water continue to run like a dumb ass, and urinal guy leaves without coming near the sink.

Edward steps behind me again, pressing against my back and leaning forward to shut the water off. His lips tickle the back of my ear as he breathes hot and wet against my skin.

"I'll be the first guy you've ever fucked?" I whisper.

He nods against me, teeth nipping my ear lobe.

I don't know what possesses me to ask my next question.

"And, you've never been fucked?" That was mildly disappointing. I'd be less nervous if he knew about the level of possible pain involved from personal experience.

He hitches a breath against my ear and closes his eyes for a moment before answering. "Once."

I raise an eyebrow. "I thought—"

"It was hardly worth acknowledging or remembering."

Well, that certainly sucks. "That bad, huh?"

"Not ideal. I try not to think about it."

Before I can dwell on it any further, Edward spins me around and kisses me, stealing my breath as I return his affection, tangling my fingers in his hair. His smiles against my mouth and my heart jolts when the bathroom door swings open and a trio of teenage baseball players barrel through, laughing. Edward has his back to them, but doesn't pull away, seemingly oblivious of the boys now using the urinals.

I hear a wolf whistle, and a low "bow chicka wow wooooow" and I unconsciously laugh into Edward's mouth… right up until I hear a sing-song, drawn-out "faggots" drift over from the urinals. We both turn to look at the culprit wearing a number 19 jersey, as he gets a healthy slap to the back of his head from his buddy wearing the number five right before he zips up.

Number Five's voice is a harsh whisper, but every word is clear.

"Is that what you call Riley, you dumb fuck? Watch your mouth. No need to be a douche bag just because nobody wants your sorry ass."

Number 19's whisper is equally easy to hear.

"Well, not everyone grows up with a gay brother and automatically knows how to react to gay things in public."

Number Five grabs Number 19 by the scruff of the neck.

"What fucking difference does it make? Apologize for being an asshole."

The kid turns around red-faced, thankfully zipped up as well as he rubs the back of his neck and winces, eyes downcast.

"I'm sorry."

"Louder," Number Five growls.

"I'm sorry!" Number 19 croaks. "I shouldn't have said that."

"Apology accepted," I reply with a falsely confident tip of my chin.

"Same here," Edward says. "Keep in mind, though," he continues, stepping closer to Number 19, the kid's eyes growing wide, "the next gay man with a black belt might not be so quick to forgive." Edward grins and pats the boy on his cheek before taking my hand and leading me out of the restroom. We both nod in thanks toward Number Five before heading out.

When the door closes behind us, Edward stops me and presses his ear to the wooden surface.

"What?" I ask.

"I'm just being nosy," he whispers.

I decide to play along and listen, too.

"What the hell is the matter with you?" The voice clearly belongs to Number Five, and he's close to shouting.

"They were kissing! What was I supposed to do? Sing a porn track like you did?"

"Probably not, but the guy wearing cowboy boots thought that was funny."

I hold my hand over my mouth to keep from laughing. I did think it was funny.

"My point is, there's no need to insult anyone, least of all because they attracted to someone you don't think they should be attracted to."

"You know I don't think like that—"

"Then stop acting like you do, because if you don't get the shit kicked out of you by a gay martial artist, you sure as hell will get your ass kicked by me next time. Got it?"

We quickly pull away from the door and head back to our seats, with me chastising myself for not giving people more credit.

When we return to our table, Renee gives us an expectant look.

"Were you safe?" she asks in that obnoxious stage whisper again.

Of course, there is such a thing as giving people too much credit…

"Oh my God, Mom! Are you serious?" Bella asks, her voice raising about three octaves.

"Yeah," Edward says with a smirk as he leans across the table. "Right up until I gave him a blow job against the sink and the baseball team came in and jerked off on us."

Every speck of color drains from Renee's face at Edward's words, and I choke on my tea.

Sitting back in his chair, Edward's smile disappears. "They were out of paper towels and the auto dryer was broken," he fudges. "You should count your lucky stars we even remembered to wash our hands after using the bathroom, because not everyone else in this restaurant does."

"I… I didn… I'm…"

Edward shakes his head and smiles again. "Bygones. Has the check come yet?"

"Yes!" Renee says, clearly anxious to change the subject. "Just waiting for the girl to bring back my card. Lunch is on me, guys."

"You didn't have to do that, Ms. Renee."

"Nonsense, Jasper. You brought my baby and grandbaby to me safely. It's the least I can do."

We both thank her profusely, and something catches my eye a few tables over.

"Hey, look, Edward! The baseball team!"

Renee groans, "Oh my God…"

I let her stew in that for a moment until I see Number Five taking his seat and staring at his ticket, then digging out his wallet with a look of concern on his face.

Before I can finish the thought to even say something, Edward is flagging down a waiter.

"Excuse me, who's serving the baseball players over there?" he asks.

"I am, sir."

"Great!" Edward pulls out his wallet, taking out a couple bills. "I'm covering Number Five's meal. Whatever's left is yours."

"That's very kind of you, sir. Shall I tell him who this gift is from?"

Edward declines with a shake of his head.

As the waiter returns to his own table, our waitress comes by, and Renee quickly scribbles out a tip, total, and her signature on her receipt before we get up to leave. I glance over at the table where the baseball team sits, noting the look of surprise on Number Five's face. I read the word "Who?" on his lips and the waiter just smiles and shakes his head. That doesn't stop Number Five from looking around the restaurant, seeking out his benefactor. His glance stops at me and he raises his eyebrows. I covertly point at Edward, the only one at our table not looking at the baseball team until Bella reaches across and punches him in the shoulder.

"What?" he asks, and I push his face toward the baseball team's table. He lets out a small laugh and gives Number Five a wave. Number Five smiles big and holds up his hand in a peace sign.

As we leave the restaurant, Renee asks, "What exactly prompted you to pay for his lunch?"

Edward pretends to ignore the question and turns my head to examine my face. Licking his thumb, he swipes it beneath my eye.

"Missed a spot?" I ask.

Edward nods, continuing to examine my face. "Yeah, I didn't realize he got you so close to your eye."

Renee stands by the door dumbstruck while Bella, Edward, and I howl in laughter.

As far as goodbyes go, it was a good one. There were happy tears and awkward hugs, awkward only because Renee didn't know where to touch us since she hadn't completely put it out of her mind that Edward and I possibly had a debauched interlude in the bathroom at that ridiculous rainforest restaurant, leaving us invisibly sticky.

Now, in Edward's car heading back to the hotel, Bella and her weird mother are the furthest things from my mind. Regardless of how my apprehension of touching Edward in public has lessened, and the fact that we're in a car with presumably more privacy, I'm restraining myself from touching him in any way. And every part of me is screaming to touch something. Take his hand, squeeze his leg, lean over the console and give him a hickey on his neck, rip open his fly and jack him off while he drives… If I give in to the slightest contact, it will surely cause us to have an accident. I don't want to die before Edward and I have actual, bonafied, penetrative, pole-to-hole sex.

"What are you thinking about?" Edward asks, his voice low and gritty, stripping away my verbal filter.

"Pole-to-hole sex… and that should have stayed in my head where it belonged…"

Edward almost swerves off the road, all-out cackling, his eyes crinkled up in laughter as he practically leans over the steering wheel.

Looks like we're gonna die anyway…

"What I meant to say, was that I have to basically sit on my hands to keep from touching you, because I don't want to cause us to have a wreck before we get back to the hotel and we get to… you know..."

Using his forearm to wipe tears from his eyes, he says, "Oh, wait. You think we're going back to the hotel to do that now? I was kinda hoping to get a nap first, Jasper."

I can't stop myself from slumping in my seat. "Oh…"

"I'm messing with you, baby. You'll be lucky to get the door closed to our room before I attack you." His expression is deadpan, and I can't understand how he doesn't appear to be anywhere close to half as affected by the situation as I am. It's wrong. I should fix that.

"I want you so bad." My words came out in what can only be described as a rusty groan, and Edward's cheeks flush a deep red.


"It literally hurts to not touch you right now. I want to kiss you, suck on your neck right here…" My hand trembles as I point at a spot midway up the side of his neck, almost touching, but not quite. "I want to rip off your shirt and drag my lips from your neck to your nipple, here…" I turn my hand slightly so my fingernail barely catches on the material of his shirt, pulling it down to circle around the spot where my mouth will eventually be.

A muscle bunches in his jaw, and his blush hasn't faded.

I move my hand farther down his shirt, stopping just above his jeans. "I want to open your fly, pull out your dick and swallow you down till I gag—"

Edward lets go of the gear shift and wraps a firm hand around my wrist, his jaw muscle flexing as his nostrils flare.

"Can't… don't… accident… pole-to-hole…"

I snicker uncontrollably as I pull his hand to my mouth, gently kissing his knuckles.

There. Even ground.

Since we don't have anything left in the way of refrigerated items, we have only our backpacks with our clothes and toiletries to bring with us into the hotel. I'm thankful for that, because I can't guarantee anything will be making its way into a refrigerator in enough time for it to be useful later when we finally reach our room. As it is, I'm bouncing on the balls of my feet as we wait our turn to check in. I'm just a wee bit impatient.

"Gotta pee?"

"Nope!" I answer excitedly. "Besides, if I did, it would be virtually impossible right now."

Edward hides his smile behind his hand as we approach the counter.

"Hi!" he says, cheerfully. "Masen, Edward. Checking in."

"Yes, sir," the girl flashes a brilliant smile as she types his name in her computer. "I have you down for two queens…" I barely contain my snort of laughter, "non-smoking, is that correct?"

"Sounds like a winner. Is there a way to request it out of the way at all? Away from other guests? I'm a horribly light sleeper. If a mouse so much as farts in the next room, I'm a cranky bastard the next day."

The check-in girl blinks at him for several seconds before composing herself. "Very well, sir. I'll have you know, though, that we pride ourselves on having a meticulously clean environment, and as such, you will have no problems with vermin—"

"It was a figure of speech, ma'am. I wake up easily."

"Of course, sir."

After inputting the rest of Edward's information and credit card details, the clerk hands us our key cards and we make our way to the elevators. When the doors open, we step inside and something occurs to me.

"Um… did you bring condoms and lube?"

Edward's eyes bug out of his head. "Oh, shit."

It's pitiful how sad my reflection looks in the mirrored walls at his words. I guess we can turn around and make a drug store run, or maybe the front desk has somethin—

"Relax, I'm kidding," he says, chuckling.

Oh, thank God…

When the elevator doors open, my heart begins to pound, the force strong enough where I fear it'll break a rib or three. After adjusting his backpack on his shoulder, Edward takes my hand and gently pulls me down the hall. My stomach is in my throat the entire trek down to our room and I hold my breath while Edward makes three attempts to swipe his card through the lock. The slow-blinking, almost bashful look he gives me over his shoulder when the door opens wipes out every shred of nervousness I have.

When the door closes behind us, I turn Edward around and shove him up against it, sealing his mouth with mine. The sound of the growl caught in his throat goes straight to my dick and I press myself against him. His hands are at my shirt, tugging it up and I break the kiss only long enough to let my backpack slide off my shoulders and for Edward to pull the garment over my head. I start grabbing at his shirt, wanting it off, too, but he beats me to it, shucking his bag and his top. Edward toes of his shoes and yanks off socks while I hop around gracelessly, tugging off my boots and socks. When we're both barefooted, Edward hauls me close and his tongue licks across my lips, slipping into my mouth making my knees almost buckle.

Edward pushes off the door and walks us across the room until the backs of my knees connect with the mattress of the bed closest to the exit. When they do, I plop down onto the bed and Edward follows me down, climbing into my lap, his arms draping around my neck as we continue to kiss. I hitch back a little bit, trying not to cause us both to topple off the edge of the bed, and I instinctively grab Edward's ass in the process. He groans and rolls his hips into me, causing me to whimper as he grinds himself against my hard-on.

Reaching down, I undo the clasp of his belt, the sound of metal catching on leather fills my ears as I release it and pull the belt free from his jeans. Edward begins rocking into my lap, rubbing himself against me, and it's making me delirious as I try to open the fly of his pants.

"Edward, stop… you're making this difficult."

With that, he hops off my lap and quickly opens his fly, wriggling out of his jeans as I start to do the same thing. When I get my own pants off, Edward's back in my lap, kissing me, his hands roaming every inch of skin he can reach.

Shoving me back onto the bed, he finally moves his mouth past mine, kissing along my jaw, his lips tickling their way up to my ear as he sucks my ear lobe into his mouth. I gasp as he nibbles and then moves his mouth to kiss the sensitive skin behind my ear.

"Roll over, love."

I honestly expected more foreplay than what we've had, but I am not about to complain, which is evident by how I nearly jostle Edward off the bed in my effort to turn onto my stomach. He drags his hand down the center of my back, and I reflexively arch like a cat, my hips tilting up and off the bed as he reaches the waistband of my boxer briefs.

"Do you have any clue how fucking hot you are, Jasper?"

He's straddling my ass and I can feel his hard dick through both layers of our underwear as he rocks against me, all the while mouthing, biting, and sucking the skin on my neck and shoulders. I'm a writhing, needy mess beneath him as I whine and gasp each time his mouth makes contact. Every time his hand sweeps down my side to briefly rest at my hip, I tilt my ass just a little bit more.

"Jesus, you're fucking eager for it, aren't you?" he whispers directly in my ear.

"Yeah… oh God, yeah… I want it… please…"

Shamelessly begging should make me feel embarrassed, but it totally doesn't.

Edward sits up and hooks his fingers in the elastic of my underwear, peeling them just off my ass, and I struggle to spread my legs just a bit farther.

"Fuck, baby... so hot like this for me. You're testing me…"

I feel him shifting behind me and then my entire body jerks when I feel what is clearly the length of his cock slide between the cheeks of my ass. Turning my head, I look over my shoulder in time to catch him releasing a long string of spit onto my ass just above where the head of his dick rests in the cleft. Then, grabbing the shaft, he smears his saliva down between my cheeks before repeating the process.

He did say he brought lube and condoms, but far be it from me to give a flying fuck about those things right now.

When he's satisfied with how he's slicked me up, he rocks himself against me, his erection sliding effortlessly up and down, and he grabs a cheek in each hand to squeeze me around him.

"God yeah, baby… please…"

"Wanna fuck you so bad…"

"Damn it, fuck! Do it, please…"

I start rocking against him, trying to entice him into giving me what I want so fucking bad, but he's having none of it. Instead, he leans across my body to lick between my shoulder blades, then reaches beneath me to take hold of my dick and mindlessly thumb the head.

"You're killing me, Edward…"

"Oh, I'm not nearly done with you yet," he promises, teeth grazing my neck. "I'm gonna turn you over and finger you open, stretch you wide and make you weak. Then I'm gonna lick the head of your cock until you're dripping, then suck your cum down my throat while I pinch your nipples. Is that okay with you?"

"Jesus!" I sob into the thin bedspread.

He flips me over like a rag doll and practically tears my underwear the rest of the way down my legs before throwing them off to the side.

He leans in for a moment and seems to remember something, hopping off the bed and sauntering across the room, shimmying the rest of the way out of his own briefs before digging into his backpack for a bottle of lube and a strip of condoms. He tosses them on the bed beside me before climbing back on top of the mattress and pushing my knees up and out, completely opening me to him. It never occurs to me to be embarrassed over being so exposed, especially with the hungry gaze he fixes on me.

"Perfect. Everything about you, love."

That's why I'm not embarrassed.

He snaps open the bottle of lube and dribbles some out onto his fingers, and I keep my knees drawn back to my chest. Smiling at me, he then closes the bottle and drops it back onto the mattress before bracing his weight with his hand on one of my legs. My breath hitches when I feel his slick fingertips tease and press at my hole briefly before one pushes inside. Edward leans back on his haunches leaving his other hand free to sweep up and down the length of my cock, pausing to thumb the spot just below the head as he continues to finger me.

Pushing in a second finger, he twists them, slowly stretching the rim while his other hand ceaselessly teases my dick. Leaning forward, he licks and bites my hip bone, making my body jerk with each nibble across my tattoo.

"Edward," I whisper.

"Yes?" He kisses the black ink on my skin, barely meeting my eyes and his bottom lip is still pressed to my flesh.

"Remember when you were fing… oh God…" Edward pushes his fingers in deeper, as far as they can go.

"Yes?" he repeats with a mischievous smirk on his face.

I momentarily forget what I was about to ask because he continues to finger me deep. My dick aches so bad the small amount of discomfort I'd felt from the intrusion is forgotten. It's obliterated when Edward curls his fingers and my breath catches when I wait for him to find my—

"Fuck!" I grunt, reflexively reaching down to grab a fistful of Edward's hair.

I can just barely hear his low chuckle right before he says, "You were about to ask me something?"

"Never mind." My words are more ground out than spoken as he strokes my prostate with his long fingers. "Didn't even have to ask."

He winks and licks a slow, wet stripe up my shaft, brushing his lips against the head of my dick and fluttering his tongue just beneath the ridge. True to his word, he's relentless until I'm dripping pre-cum onto my belly, and I can't stop squirming on the bed. My balls draw up tight when his free hand slides up my ribs with his thumb and forefinger capturing my nipple in a teasing pinch.

"You're so quiet," Edward rasps, not even lifting his mouth away from my dick. "It's starting to give me a complex. I asked for an out-of-the-way room for a reason, baby…"

Pinching my nipple again with one hand, he presses his fingertips of the other against my prostate at the same and I start hollering a string of gibberish, prompting Edward to finally take my dick in his mouth in a completely-engulfing, tortuous suck. Each cheek-hollowing slurp draws straight from my balls and I can't stop yelling until I shoot into Edward's mouth. Holding his head still, Edward withdraws his fingers from me and jacks my dick, his lips sealed tight around me. Before long, I start babbling, begging him to stop when my cock becomes far too sensitive to continue receiving Edward's thorough attention.

Climbing up the bed, he hesitates with his mouth hovering just above mine for a moment and I lean up to kiss him, my tongue in his mouth tasting the evidence of my orgasm and he pushes me back onto the mattress, covering my body with his own. I wrap my limbs around him and he sinks into me, his hard-on digging painfully into my hip.

Edward finally breaks the kiss, leaving me gasping as he grabs for the strip of condoms.

"Wait," I pant, having a difficult time forming a fucking sentence in my brain. "I haven't even touch… do you want me to—"

"If you touch me right now, this will be over in five seconds, Jasper."

I nod and just try to catch my breath.

Edward tears off a condom and nudged the latex down with his thumbs so he can rip the package open without damaging the prize inside. My heart pounds in my chest as I watch him roll the rubber onto his dick, squeezing the air out of the reservoir in the tip like a good little High School Health Class Student. His long fingers are hypnotizing as they work and his pink tongue peeks out of the corner of his mouth as he concentrates.

"How can you manage to make putting on a condom look sexy?" I ask, my earlier nerves making a return visit.

Keeping my focus on his hands, I notice how I'm not the only one who's nervous, as those hands tremble ever so slightly when he opens the bottle of lube once again, squeezing out a hefty amount into his palm before slicking his length. I swallow hard when he drops the bottle beside me and his eyes meet mine.

"Any time you need me to stop, I promise I will. I swear it. I don't care if you say it now, or if I'm halfway inside you, or if I'm about to come, it doesn't matter. I won't get mad, I won't hold it against you—"

"Edward, I love you. If you don't fuck me right now, I'm fairly certain I will die."

He blinks a couple times in silence and I realize what I just said. I smile.

"That wasn't just some flippant comment. I'm serious. I do love you. But, I'm just as serious about the other part—"

Edward falls forward and all but crushes me beneath the force of his kiss, making soft, throaty noises as my hands grapple for purchase across his shoulders. My brain nearly fails to register Edward's arm working between us until I feel the blunt press of his dick against me, enough pressure to make me dizzy and I struggle not to sob into his mouth. When the head pops past the muscle, it's like a punch to the gut and I squeeze Edward's body tight with my arms and legs, afraid I'm going to somehow fall away from everything. He rocks his hips forward a bit and there's a slight edge of a burn, and I squeeze my eyes shut tight enough to see stars and I hold my breath.

"Need me to…?"

"No, no…" I breathe. "Don't stop."

As he pushes deeper inside me, it hurts a little and I can't keep a whimper from escaping.

Edward pulls back. "I don't want to hurt you."

"It's okay," I assure him, my hand flitting to his face. "It's just gonna take some adjusting, that's all."

When he spreads his knees a little between my legs, I instinctively tighten around him, and I'm not entirely sure if the expression on his face is pleasure or pain. His words answer my unspoken question when he says, "Don't… don't do that. I'm pretty sure I'll come if you do that again."

Hardly enough to discourage me, I determinedly bite my bottom lip and squeeze even tighter around him. He dips his head back down to bury his face in my neck and inadvertently thrusts the rest of his length inside me in one go.

"Fuck…" I gasp into his shoulder, shivering as Edward pants hard just below my ear.

"I'm sorry… are you okay?" he mumbles against my skin.

"I'm good… just don't stop."

The drag is intense as he pulls out, even more so when he rocks back into me. My entire body shakes and Edward's voice is strained. "Jasper… oh Jesus… just…"

I turn his face toward mine so I can kiss him, unable to properly form words myself. When Edward's hips find a rhythm, words aren't necessary, sentences out of the question. Once my body has adjusted, I try to do everything physically possible to pull him deeper inside me. My heels dig into his ass, my arms form a vice-like grip across his shoulders and I grind down against each inward thrust.

"Need more… need you deeper..."

Edward smiles against my neck and asks, "Did you just take a shot at my size?"

"God, no! You're huge!" He laughs at that. "I'm just greedy…"

"Well, if you want deeper, I can give you that. Turn over."

I try not to focus on how empty I feel when Edward withdraws, and I scramble on to my hands and knees, pressing my chest into the bed with my ass as high in the air as I can get it.

"My imagination did this absolutely no justice, Jasper. Seeing your ass fucked open and on display like this…" He squeezes both my cheeks and I spread my knees farther.

"Come on… fuck me, please…"

Then he's filling me, clasping my hips as he pushes in and I'm right there at the brink, my body trembling.

"I'll give you anything you want, baby, but just know that doing this slow will be quite difficult for me."

"No… no slow. Hard and fast. I need it. Drill me…"

"Dri… Christ. I had plans for our first time to be nice and gentle." His voice is tight and it's hard to tell if his words are tinged with disappointment.

I feel kinda bad now. Here I am, pretty much demanding he fuck me through the mattress, and he had planned this to be sweet and romantic all along. Yesterday, in the pool, he said he would fuck me deep. He didn't say it was gonna be a hard-and-fast porn fest. True enough, things have been far from sweet since we entered the hotel room, but this is different. This is a connection we haven't had before. Just because I like it more rough than gentle doesn't necessarily mean he does. I've been too selfish. Not to mention, I've never been on the receiving end of a thorough plowing. I've just enjoyed giving one. This could be totally different, and I'm probably getting ahead of myself.

"Don't listen to me. My brain ran away. I just need you, Edward."

He lets out a nervous laugh and leans over my body, his voice rumbling right in my ear.

"You misunderstood me. I just keep getting caught off guard by how fucking perfect you are for me. I want to give you exactly what you've asked for."

Never mind!


"And you're so polite about it…"

He clasps my chin in his hand tugging it up to stretch out my neck right before he fastens his hot mouth right on my artery and sucks.

"Fuck! Please, Edward!" His thumb slips over my jaw, brushing over my lips and I draw it hard in my mouth.

Growling, Edward sits up and grasps my shoulders, fingertips digging in, surely leaving bruises. I arch my back and spread my knees some more, rocking back against him, silently asking him to get this show on the road.

And then he does.

His pace is quick, quicker than I expected it would be and I can hardly breathe each time he bottoms out with his hips making rhythmic, fleshy slaps against my ass. The obscene sound, his grunts, and the deep repetitive punch of his dick inside me make me dizzy and I find I can breathe again when I start shouting. Words like harder, yeah, right there, just like that, run a continuous loop and I'm going out of my fucking mind. I had no clue it would be this good.

I reach down to fist my dick and I'm almost embarrassed by how I whine, "Jesus, I'm about to come…"

When I shoot onto the bedspread, it's borderline painful. Edward lets out what sounds like a startled yelp when my body tightens around him as I come and my knees can hardly bear my own weight any longer. I almost miss Edward's strained, "Coming…" and I'm surprised how I can actually feel him filling the condom inside me right as we both collapse on the bed.

Both of us twisting around on the mattress, Edward manages to pull out and he disposes of the condom in the wastebasket by the bed.

My body's still shaking, and I scrunch up my face when I roll over the wet spot. Edward makes quick work of pulling back the bedspread, kicking it to the foot of the bed and getting both of us under the sheets. Hands and mouths roam wherever they can reach and I, for one, remain breathless, despite my calming heart and my body's exhaustion and need for a nap.

"Love you," I whisper, dragging my lips up Edward's jaw to his ear.

"Love you, too," he says, grinning and pulling my mouth to his.

"That was…"


"Stay here the rest of the day?" I ask, tilting his head back to mouth his Adam's apple.

"I'm game."

"My body says, 'sleep', but I just don't wanna…"

I start wriggling my way underneath the sheet, tonguing and nipping his skin.

"Sleep's overrated."

True facts right there.

A/N Thanks for reading!