Fresh Meat, Part II
Summary: Blind Mag wanted to finally meet her goddaughter, but Amber was in a wicked mood and had other ideas. It started with teasing Mag about how similar Shilo looked to Marni, but then Amber wouldn't let Shilo leave…
Disclaimer: I do not own Repo! The Genetic Opera, unless we're talking about a copy of the DVD or the soundtrack.
Author's Notes: Blame my muses.
Blind Mag was as good as her word. That evening Shilo waited by her window until Mag's car pulled up in front of the Wallace house. Mag rang the bell. "Shilo? Will you come down, please?"
Shilo picked the lock on her door and raced down the stairs to let Mag in. Mag made sure the door was closed and her chauffeur couldn't see her before wrapping Shilo in a tight embrace.
"I wasn't sure if you'd changed your mind." Blind Mag whispered. "I was afraid the Stockholm Syndrome might have worn off. And…your afterglow has worn off too, I'm sure."
"No…I've been looking forward to this all day." Shilo kissed Mag's neck gently. "Would you like to come up to my room?"
"Of course." Mag slipped her hand into Shilo's as Shilo led her up the stairs. Shilo blushed deeply at the gesture; in response to the girl's flushed cheeks, Mag added, "When I was blind, my friends often took my hands and led me places. It comforts me to be led."
When they arrived at Shilo's room, Blind Mag immediately set about looking around. She bent over Shilo's insect collection. "I didn't know you were interested in bugs."
Shilo slipped her hand into Mag's. Her heart was thudding uncomfortably in her chest; she had been hoping she and Mag could simply start kissing without Mag judging anything about her room.
"Actually, they're called insects. They're only 'bugs' if they're part of the order Hemiptera. You can tell which ones are Hemiptera because of the…the tent or triangle shape on their backs." Shilo knew she was babbling. She forced down a swallow.
"How did you collect all of these? I thought you weren't allowed outside of your room."
"I learned how to pick my lock. That's how I got to the door to let you in. Sometimes I can get to Mom's grave. That's where I collect my insects."
Blind Mag was still poring over Shilo's collection. "I've never met anyone who collected insects before," she said absently. "I've seen this one before, but I never knew its name."
Shilo walked to stand just behind Mag and wrapped her arms around the singer's waist. "You don't have to look at all my stuff," Shilo mumbled.
"It's all right." Mag touched Shilo's hand. "God…do you sleep here?" Carefully extricating herself from Shilo's embrace, Mag reached out and touched the plastic surrounding Shilo's bed. "It's so…creepy."
"I have to," said Shilo glumly. "Dad says I'm immunocompromised. I could get sick easily, so my bed should stay as sterile as possible."
Mag quirked one eyebrow. "Perhaps we should go somewhere else."
Shilo smiled shyly. "I don't think any more harm could be possibly done after earlier today." Shilo hoped Mag would take the hint and then wrap her in her arms, but instead Mag smiled serenely and turned to look at Shilo's collection of books. "Insect books, of course…astronomy…oh, and Alice's Adventures in Wonderland and The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, those are such classics…"
"Mag, please…" Shilo grabbed Blind Mag's hand. "You don't have to…to examine my room like this."
"Is something wrong?" Mag asked gently, placing her free hand on Shilo's cheek. "I may have come here with the intention of taking to bed with you, but I also want to get to know you. You're still my goddaughter, and I have seventeen years of catching up to do."
Shilo felt heat burning behind her eyes. She closed them, but she couldn't stop a few tears from falling. "I'm just afraid."
"Afraid? Of what?"
"I'm seventeen and sick. That's all there is to me," Shilo burst out. "I collect insects because I can get access to insects. I read about astronomy and look at the stars because I can hardly look at anything else. I'm trapped in my room. Everything about me is because I'm trapped in my room. I didn't want you to know that…that…I mean, you're amazing, and I'm just…boring."
"Hush, little one," Mag soothed, taking Shilo into her arms. "You were really afraid I would reject you?"
Shilo sniffled. "Yes."
"Well, you call me 'amazing.' But as you saw earlier today, I'm not an employee of GeneCo. I'm their slave. They call me their voice because they have taken my voice away and made me their puppet. Every time I open my mouth, whatever comes out, be it a song or…or speaking, I can voice only what GeneCo wants me to. Almost every moment, I am watched, followed, or both, by Rotti Largo's henchgirls or other lackeys. Do you know what that does to a person?"
Shilo tightened her grip on Blind Mag. "N-no."
"The person I was when I started working for GeneCo is gone. If there's any of Magdalene Defoe left, she's hiding, somewhere in my head where I can't reach her. I truly am nothing more than the voice of GeneCo." She kissed the top of Shilo's head. "You were never allowed to reach your full potential, while I had my…self excised just as efficiently as the eyes I was born with. So perhaps we are well matched."
Shilo tilted her head up and kissed Mag lightly where her jaw rounded into her neck. "Don't talk like that," she whispered. "Please don't talk like that. You protected me from Amber. You were amazing earlier today, in…in more ways than one." Shilo felt her cheeks reddening.
"I'm sorry." Mag ran a soothing palm up and down Shilo's back. "I didn't mean to upset you. I wanted to reassure you that you are not the only one who feels rather…empty." Mag sighed. "You still have a chance. You can learn from my mistakes. I want you to take more than just pleasure from this."
"I'm sure I will," Shilo whispered. "But…I'm nervous. I've never…never done this before."
"I know," said Mag quietly. "I expect to be teaching you a bit. And I look forward to it."
"Mmm." Shilo closed her eyes. "I am too. Still…still a little nervous…"
"I could give you a massage to relax you," Mag suggested.
"That sounds nice."
"Why don't you lie down?"
Blind Mag released Shilo, who went to her bedside. She hesitated and gave Mag a questioning look instead of lying down. "Mag?"
"May I…take off my nightgown?"
Shilo hadn't had the faintest idea what to wear to look alluring—it wasn't as if she owned any clothes that were even remotely seductive—so she had decided to choose something comfortable and easy to take off. She had rather been hoping Mag could undress her again…
"Or…could you take off my nightgown?"
"If you want." Mag took a few steps closer to Shilo, tilting her head down until their foreheads were almost touching. She stroked Shilo's cheek, trailing her hand down the girl's throat to the neckline of her nightdress, carefully undoing each button and letting her knuckles brush against the girl's skin. Shilo tilted her head back, eyes closed, as Mag pushed the nightgown's sleeves down her arms and the garment fell to the floor, leaving Shilo standing in nothing but a pair of white panties. "I already knew this, but you're lovely," Mag whispered.
"Thank you." Shilo looked up tremulously. "Am I really?"
"Of course." Mag brushed a hand against Shilo's cheek. "Why would you think otherwise?"
Shilo bit her lower lip. "Because…I…I stopped growing early, so I look like a little kid. I never get to do anything, so I'm scrawny and have no muscle tone. I can't go outside except when I sneak out at night, so I'm pasty. And I'm bald." Shilo hung her head. "Next to you, I just feel so ugly."
Mag bent to pull the wig from the girl's head and touch a few kisses to the skin underneath. "You're far from ugly. You're adorable." She trailed her hands down Shilo's arms. "And you're not scrawny. You are delicate, and your curves are subtle, but I like that. It makes me want to be gentle with you. You are pale-skinned, but it's nice." Mag brushed her lips against Shilo's shoulder. "You're not pasty, it's like…"—Mag paused to kiss the girl's skin—"porcelain that breathes." Mag pulled back and laughed at herself. "I'm sorry. It's all the florid lyrics I'm made to sing."
Shilo was sure she was blushing furiously. She laid her trembling hands on Mag's waist. "Mag…may I…may I take off your dress?"
In response, Mag turned around and lifted up her dark, curled hair, exposing the zipper down the back of her elegant black dress. Shilo undid the little metal hook at the top of the zipper and pulled down on the tab, exposing the pale skin and curves of shoulder blades, ribs and spine underneath. Mag lowered her arms so Shilo could pull off the upper part of her dress, then give the skirt a light tug, causing it to fall from Mag's slim hips and reveal that she was wearing a backless lavender silk teddy.
"Is that for me?" Shilo murmured, touching the material lightly.
"Who else would it be for?" Mag faced Shilo again, smiling.
Shilo let her eyes travel over Mag's body, admiring the way the silk clung to her. "You're beautiful."
"Thank you. May I lie down?"
"Sure." Shilo parted the plastic hanging and climbed into bed, allowing Mag to follow and lie beside her. Shilo nuzzled close to her, nestling her head under the singer's chin; Mag slid one hand over Shilo's back. For a moment, Shilo lay utterly still, then she remembered that she was capable of movement and reached for Mag, her palm coming to rest in the low of Mag's back.
"You're shaking," Mag whispered. "Did you take your pills before I got here?"
Shilo whimpered in protest, but extricated herself from Mag's embrace, retrieved her pill bottle from the bedside table, quickly swallowed two pills, and immediately wrapped herself around Mag again.
One of Mag's arms was pinned beneath Shilo's waist; she stroked the girl's neck with her free hand. "I thought you wanted a massage."
"That would mean I'd have to move." Shilo kissed Mag's upper chest. "You have beautiful collarbones."
Mag laughed softly. "You have me in your bed, wearing lingerie, and you choose to comment on my collarbones?"
"They're nice!" Shilo blushed.
"I'm only teasing," said Mag gently.
Shilo traced Mag's spine and shoulder blades with her fingertips. "You have a beautiful back too. I always loved it when you did broadcasts wearing backless dresses…"
Mag gave a single cheerless chuckle. "Yes, GeneCo does know how to display their most successful commodity. My eyes may be the only part of my body that are from GeneCo, but that didn't stop them from showing off all of me…God forbid any of my fans think of me as a person instead of a pretty mouthpiece."
"I didn't mean it like that," Shilo whispered.
"I know. I'm sorry…I never have the freedom to talk about it." Mag kissed the top of Shilo's head.
Instead of responding verbally, Shilo pressed a few kind kisses onto Mag's neck. Mag sighed lightly, tilting her head back. "Shi…"
Mag carefully pulled Shilo up so they were eye-to-eye and kissed her. Shilo's eyes fluttered shut as she returned the kiss. Earlier that day, Mag's kisses had been comforting, kind yet chaste, a tacit message that her intentions were driven by sympathy, not lust. However, now was a perfectly appropriate time to express desire; Mag suckled lightly at Shilo's lower lip, one hand sliding down the girl's side to caress one thigh, down to the back of her knee and up again. Shilo trembled a little, reaching over Mag to slide a palm over the singer's bare back. Mag's soft tongue probed at the entrance of Shilo's mouth, exploring almost shyly. Shilo thrilled at the sensation of Mag's gentle tongue against her own, simultaneously soothing and exciting in its warmth. A light moan rose from her throat.
Mag stopped immediately. "Are you all right?"
"Don't stop," Shilo begged, and so Mag returned to her sweet kisses. Shilo soon fell into a blissful haze, forgetting that anything but her and Mag existed. She draped one leg over Mag's hip, and as she wrapped herself around the singer's body, Mag felt the telltale warmth between Shilo's legs pressed against her thigh.
Well, this won't take long, Mag thought. Carefully, she guided Shilo onto her back, pinning the girl's wrists above her head, Mag's thigh still flush against the join of Shilo's legs. Shilo stifled another moan, a deeper one, against Mag's mouth. Shilo writhed beneath Mag, straining against the singer's grip on her wrists; Mag began to rock gently against the girl,
memory is imperfect own biases es ders, but not too hardities, abortion was considerednists of color...anadder, but Lake Bluff who spread her legs and arched her back, matching the slow, almost shy rhythm of Mag's hips.
"Mag, let me touch you," Shilo begged. Mag released Shilo's hands, which immediately flew to Mag's shoulders. Instead of going back to kissing Shilo's mouth, Mag's lips moved down Shilo's neck, letting her teeth brush against the girl's skin without actually biting, reaching her collarbones and brushing the very tip of her tongue against the slight hollow between them. Shilo gasped sharply, her hips bucking against Mag's body.
"Shi, can you breathe?"
"Yes," Shilo panted.
Mag laid her ear against the girl's chest. "Your heart…"
"I'd be more worried if it weren't racing!"
Mag laughed lightly. "Just please, tell me if your lungs are giving you trouble."
"I'm fine. Please, just stop…stopping. Don't torture me!"
Mag sat up suddenly. "Shilo, what Amber did to me was torture. I have no intention of treating you like that."
Shilo felt ashamed, but her brain was too hazy with pleasure to know what to say. Mag took her silence and her wounded expression as apology enough and dotted Shilo's upper chest with more kisses, resuming the rocking motion of her hips. She kissed the small swell of Shilo's breast, enjoying the breathless squeal Shilo gave as Mag suckled lightly at her nipple. Shilo's nails dug into Mag's back. The sensation of pain shot through Mag's mind, mixing with the exquisite reaction to Shilo's cries and somehow becoming pleasure.
"Again," Mag whispered against Shilo's tender flesh.
"Scratch me again. Not too hard…"
Shilo raked her nails over Mag's shoulder blades. "Like that?"
Mag suckled almost roughly at Shilo's breast, earning more deliciously satisfying gasps in response. Shilo kept dragging her nails up and down Mag's shoulders, loving the way Mag's back muscles rippled under her hands. Shilo squeezed Mag's thigh between her legs; Mag shivered as she felt the heat of Shilo's desire grow again, burning even through the girl's cotton panties. And, oh, Mag feels like she's on fire too…
Shilo whimpered at the loss of pressure when Mag briefly lifted herself up, but the whimper became a moan as Mag's hand slipped beneath the single layer that covered her most intimate places, caressing her entrance, two fingers moving within her. "Mag…yes…"
Mag's free hand, which had been resting at Shilo's waist, slid up her ribcage to knead her other breast. For a moment, the girl forgot everything but her own rapture, and her nails stopped their work on Mag's back; Mag let that slide, focusing instead on touching Shilo in exactly the right places. And judging by the way the girl was groaning and trembling, she was succeeding.
"Mag…ohh, Mag…!" Shilo's hips bucked in time with Mag's steady strokes. Mag pushed another finger into the girl, her fingertips rubbing Shilo's inner walls in a "come hither" motion. The girl gave a long, ragged moan, her body shaken by wild spasms.
"Shi? Shilo?" Mag covered the girl's face with kisses.
Shilo's mind could barely form words. The only phoneme left to her was: "Mag…"
The singer gathered Shilo into her arms. "You're lovely when you're helpless with ecstasy," Mag whispered almost shyly.
Shilo clung to Mag, kissing her wherever her lips could find skin; this ended up being her throat and chest.
"Catch your breath, Shilo. You're still panting. I don't want you to have an attack." Even as Mag spoke soothingly, she hooked a hand around the back of Shilo's knee and cautiously moved the girl's leg to rest between her thighs, because she'd go mad if she didn't keep pressure there…hearing Shilo's beautiful cries had affected her powerfully…
Shilo didn't miss the intent of the gesture; she reached to Mag's back, for the one silky ribbon tied in a bow that kept the straps of Mag's teddy from falling, kissing her way down to the tops of the singer's pale breasts.
"Shilo…" Mag shied away. "Don't. I don't want you to see have to see the scars."
"I don't care about the scars," Shilo insisted. "You're gorgeous." This time when Shilo pulled on the ribbon, Mag didn't move or protest, nor did she object when Shilo lightly tugged the silk down to Mag's waist. Shilo lay down, curled up slightly with her forehead touching her lover's, brushing soft, back-handed caresses over Mag's breasts. Mag trembled, but made no sound. Encouraged, Shilo cupped her hands, massaging and kneading. A little gasp fled Mag's lips. "Are you okay?"
"You really don't mind the scars?" Mag whispered.
Shilo gently took Mag's nipples between her thumbs and forefingers. "Does it seem like I mind?"
Mag sighed, and Shilo moved closer, taking the tip of one of Mag's breasts into her mouth. Mag gripped Shilo's hips tightly and rolled onto her back, giving Shilo a better angle. She arched her spine, her hands gliding over the girl's back. Mag found herself biting her lips in order to not make any sound, and Shilo briefly looked up from her task. "You can cry out. It's okay."
Mag nodded, eyes closed. Shilo returned to suckling Mag's right breast, one hand stroking the singer's hair, the other attending carefully to her left breast. Shilo felt Mag's hand press on the back of her neck, urging her on, but Shilo could not bring herself to be anything but as tender as possible.
"Shilo." Mag's voice was a dense moan. "Harder."
"I don't want to hurt you…"
"It's you. It's all right." Mag arched her back again. "Harder…please."
Shilo obeyed, the motions of her mouth and hands growing rougher, more fervent. Soft, low cries came from Mag's throat without any consent from her mind, but she was past caring; she didn't mind Shilo hearing anymore. She hadn't meant to lose her composure, to make noise, to let Shilo see her so vulnerable. But there was no going back now; her body was doing whatever it wanted, her legs wrapping around Shilo's waist and her nails digging into the girl's skin. Shilo's inexperienced but wonderfully passionate ministrations were driving her wild, and she waited for her lover to understand what she needed, not wanting to beg, but she couldn't help it…
"Shilo, please take me!" She barely recognized her own voice.
"Okay, Mag. I will." Shilo leaned up to kiss Mag's mouth one more time.
Mag forced herself to release the grip of her legs on Shilo's waist so the girl could touch the parts of her that were screaming for contact, but instead Shilo sank down so that her face was level with Mag's navel.
"Shilo?" Mag's voice was unnaturally hoarse. "What are you doing?" She hadn't wanted Shilo to do this for her; she'd only wanted the girl's hands. But her legs moved apart of their own accord, and Shilo smiled gently up at her.
"The same thing you did for me earlier today. I paid attention." Shilo dipped her head down, disappearing from Mag's view.
She had indeed been paying attention. Mag cupped her trembling hands around the back of Shilo's smooth, bald head as the girl's gentle tongue traced Mag's most delicate flesh, her lips leaving tiny kisses. Afraid of hurting Shilo, Mag fisted her hands in the sheets. She groaned as Shilo's tongue moved into her, praying that her rocking hips weren't interfering or, worse, hurting the poor girl's face, for there was no way she could control anything her body was doing.
It was when Shilo's tongue laved over the most exquisitely sensitive part of her of body that Mag was flooded with sensations of blistering pleasure, and she could have sworn there were sparks dancing in the corners of her eyes. She cried out sharply, falling limp and exhausted back onto the sheets.
Then there was Shilo with her arms wrapped around her. "Shi…" Mag whispered. "Thank you. Did I hurt you?"
"No." Shilo kissed Mag's forehead.
Mag nestled her head under Shilo's chin, overwhelmed by deep, contented exhaustion. "You really were paying attention."
"I'm glad I was able to give you pleasure." Shilo trailed one hand over Mag's bare back. "You're so beautiful."
"So are you," Mag sighed.
They lay still for a while, holding and caressing each other. Then Shilo spoke. "I can't wait to see you sing tonight."
Despite the warmth of the girl lying in her arms, Mag's blood ran cold. Tonight, she would sing her life away. At the end of her final song, she would take out her own eyes and then…well, she could only assume GeneCo would kill her as swiftly as possible, probably a Repo Man shooting her from offstage. "Shilo?"
Mag felt her heart pounding so hard it was almost painful. "I don't want you to watch my performance tonight."
Shilo sat up, looking concerned. "Why?"
"Because…" Mag could barely get the words out. How could she tell Shilo that she was planning to cause her own death that night? Although…it might be worse for Shilo to come the Genetic Opera expecting a magnificent show and seeing what was sure to be a grisly death. When Mag had woken that morning, she hadn't been afraid of her impending death. She knew exactly what she was doing; she was leaving her tormentor GeneCo forever, and going out with a bang. "Because my retirement means my death. And I knew this when I chose to retire."
"What!" Shilo sat up, looking horrified. "You're…you're going to die after your performance tonight? Is that what you're saying?"
Mag sat up to take Shilo into an embrace. "Yes, little one. That's what I'm saying."
"Why?" Shilo wept.
"I chose this a while ago." Mag kissed the girl's scalp, as if that had any prayer of comforting her. "I can't live as GeneCo's slave any longer. I knew if I left, it would mean my life. But I'd rather be dead than…than what I am now. An empty shell, insides excised by GeneCo."
"But they'll only take your eyes, right!" Shilo cried. "You can live without eyes!"
"My existence after working for GeneCo would be embarrassing to Rotti. I'm certain he told whichever Repo Man he assigned to take my eyes to kill me in the process."
"No," Shilo sobbed. "No! This can't be happening!"
Mag rocked Shilo back and forth, hardly able to believe how blissfully happy they had been only a few moments ago. "I'm so sorry, my little one," she murmured brokenly.
"C-can't you decide to not retire? Can't you sing your last song tonight and then announce that you won't be retiring? Please!"
"I can't live like that anymore." Mag closed her eyes in agony. "You would rather the Largos continue using and tormenting me?"
"No! Just…couldn't you lie? Say you're not going to retire so you don't get killed, and then run away? You could stay here! I'd hide you…I could get Dad to hide you!" Shilo squeezed Mag so tightly it almost hurt.
"Thank you, Shi, but…GeneCo puts tracking devices in all of the organs they own. They will be able to track my eyes, and then you and your father would be in danger for harboring me."
Shilo was quiet for a moment but for her continued weeping. "But…Dad's a doctor. He could take your eyes out safely! We could hide them somewhere! They'd never find you!"
That was an option Mag hadn't considered. She had known GeneCo would kill her for retiring, but damned if she was going to be hunted down by a Repo Man, spending her aching hour cowering and terrified. So she'd planned to rip out her own eyes on stage, and then almost certainly be immediately murdered. But to live…to be blind again, but to be free, and to be with Shilo…
It was risky, and despite what had passed that day between her and Shilo, they really did barely know each other. But Shilo was still her goddaughter, and Mag still wanted to be present in Shilo's life as she had promised Marni. To change her well-laid plans and risk both Nathan and Shilo was intimidating…and yet…Nathan would surely remove Mag's eyes to keep her alive if Mag could remind him that she had been Marni's best friend, that Marni would have wanted her to live. It would be hard, to be blind again—and not just blind, but eyeless—but Amber Sweet would never crawl into her bed again. Instead, she'd be sleeping next to Shilo.
"All right. We'll talk to Nathan when he gets home."
Shilo gasped with relief. "I don't want you to die. I know I only met you today, but please…I don't want you to still be the voice of GeneCo, but I don't want you to die either."
"It is a good idea, Shilo." Mag let go of the girl. "We should get dressed…the plan is certainly ruined if Nathan finds us like this."
Shilo, blushing slightly, nodded in agreement, and they got up and quickly and quietly helped each other dress, then departed from Shilo's room. Not twenty minutes later, the front door swung open, signaling Nathan Wallace's return from work, and the first thing he noticed was Blind Mag sitting next to his daughter on the steps, holding her hand.
A/N: I really had no idea how to end this. I probably won't write another chapter. Let's just assume Nathan decides to safely take out Mag's eyes but, unbeknownst to Mag and Shilo, return them to GeneCo to avoid trouble. But…um…maybe Rotti is still pissed at Nathan for refusing and kills him? Because seriously, he needs to die in order for Shilo to have her genetic emancipation. And then Mag and Shilo don't have to worry about sneaking around, yaaaay!
(It's 2 AM. Can you tell?)