title: till death do us part.
summary: mirror mirror on the wall, am i the most messed up of them all?
author's note: SECOND TO LAST VICTORIOUS PIECE. Lovee you all! 3
"here's the ending.
they all die."
tori whispers, her stained white dress floating behind her, "mirror mirror on the wall, am i the most messed up of them all?"
the moon doesn't answer, so tori sits with her head in her hands.
tori's been sitting inside her house for three weeks, watching disney movies and pretending that she can be a princess, dancing with her prince charming. –but prince charming is off traveling and probably never coming back.-
tori eats till she gains five pounds and then she throws up five days straight; trying to make herself still beautiful for prince charming. tori loses her tan, her skin slowly turning milky white and her eyes have dark circles from insomnia. tori sends prince charming facebook messages, emails, texts, but he hasn't answered one message.
she cries herself to sleep, but she tans the next day and only eats celery because she must stay somewhat sane.
(she looks at the wound on her arm, cries until the tears sting her cheeks.)
prince charming calls cat, and then cat calls tori.
cat yells excitedly into the phone, "he's coming home tor!"
tori laughs, tries to make him back into the perfect boy she fell in love with, but only comes up with bitter disappointment.
cat blabs on and tori nods along, even though cat can't see and by the time cat hangs up, tori's got crescent moons in her palms.
tori slips into a bath with bubble bath, cleaning herself for the first time in a week and a half. she shaves her long, tanned legs and her razor slips for just a second before she can fix it. her blood travels down her leg, mingling with the bath water. she stares in confusion as she watches the blood twirl, tainting the water.
she continues her shaving, always thinking of prince charming but her mind is lingering on the blood.
she turns on the shower head, washes away her thoughts and her sins.
prince charming comes back with his hair buzzed off and his eyes weary. he comes by to tori's house before he visits anyone else, and he stands on the doorstep, leaning on the pillar as he waits for her. she looks at him through the door, her eyes tired and her mood suddenly falling. he suddenly looks so lost, looking at her with nostalgia.
"beck," she whispers.
her month of hiding and running away has not prepared her for this moment. he comes inside, her mouth suddenly dry and he leans over and her breath heightens. he hugs her, holding her like he used to, warm and protecting. she leans her head on his chest, her eyes closing while he whispers in her ear, "hi."
she looks up at him and then he's looking at her too and is it a dream or is he kissing her again?
his lips taste like a mixture of cigarettes and iced tea and she can smell summer on him; sunscreen and warmth. he presses her against a wall, melding their skin together in the heat of her home. "i missed you," she whispers as he kisses her neck.
he breathes against her shoulder, "i missed you too."
and then he's leading her to the couch and she thinks he'll make love to her like they used to, but instead he takes her in his lap and just holds her, breathing in each other's scent again.
"i still love you," he says.
but this time, she doesn't know the answer.
"i hoped you did."
they fall asleep on the sofa, her head nestled against his chest and it's uncomfortable, but they can't bare to move. tori's parents are away, and as she wakes up to beck's sleeping form breathing against hers, she wonders if this could work. but when she touches his cheek and he awakens, she can see the pain in his eyes and her mind becomes silent.
beck smiles down at her, his eyelids drooping and she pulls herself up to faintly kiss his lips.
"morn," he mumbles.
she smiles, "can we stay like this forever?"
he laughs, but in his eyes is someone else, and so she whispers, "maybe not. this couch is too uncomfortable."
he smiles at her and he makes her breakfast and they play family, but there is always a girl lingering in the back of their heads, always having the most power over themselves.
three days before graduation, sinjin van cleef brings a gun to school.
that day, two people had been rushed to the hospital.
tori vega and jade west.
the beautiful girls have fallen.
beck is staring at the wound on her arm, she has a feeling.
"please," she begs, "please don't look at it anymore."
(because tori vega should have been the one killed, and jade west would be the one kissing her prince charming like the fairytale should go.)
when sinjin points the gun at tori, jade yells at him. "don't do it, you idiot!"
tori whimpers, her eyes wide with fright. sinjin turns to jade and before tori can scream out, sinjin's saying, "you've never loved me like i've loved you."
tori could've gotten jade out of the way if she moved a little faster, but the bullet swipes her arm and hits jade full in the chest.
blood flies down tori's arms, but she's watching jade fall to the ground.
(all the mean girls must fall, tori thinks, but when she wished on stars for beck, she did not want this.)
beck takes her hand and lies her on her bed, her hair falling in waves, covering her pillow. "tori," he says, "i'm in love with you, and it hurts. it hurts."
his body is hovering above hers, and as she kisses the pain away, she mumbles on his body, "i'll fix it, i'll fix you again."
they make love, sweet love, until she is hoarsely screaming for him and he is moaning into her and it's a symphony. he can taste everything on her, tangerines & vanilla & black. when he comes, he says her name in a quiet whisper, filling her to the brim with love-oh-eternal-sunshine.
he holds her for a while after that, just tori and her prince charming, reminiscing on days without cracks in their masks. tori traces beck's face, watching how his lips curve and feeling how his smiles lifts her soul to the lingering traces of heaven above.
beck kisses her forehead before he leaves her house. she frowns as he takes his tiny backpack and his guitar and he walks home.
(she's afraid she'll lose him like he lost jade. it's scary, always waiting for the person you love to die.)
once upon a time, on the night jade dies, beck comes into tori's hospital room and he whispers.
"till death do us part."
he runs away before jade's funeral, trying to find her lingering scent in the world.
everyone worships tori, calls her a hero or some shit like that.
(and suddenly, tori's wish she made in middle school on a shooting star to be popular is looking less and less beautiful.)
tori misses graduation, and so does beck.
beck doesn't call like he promised.
(and tori's thinking of all the words he said.)
and then it's some joke has been bestowed on her.
"beck has been in an accident, honey," his mother says.
tori clutches the phone, "no. that's not possible."
tori cries, but then beck's mom says the words, "he did it purposely. he's at Lloyd Hospital."
tori slams the phone down, looking for her bag because she can't let beck die without marrying her because her dreams are supposed to come true.
beck oliver was in love with tori vega.
(but that never meant that he was going to keep his promises. because when tori said, "stay here with me," he knew it was a matter of time before he returned to jade.
he always returns to jade and it hurts him more than you'd think.)
4 MISSED CALLS.
he's under suicide watch and as she clutches his limp hand she whispers, "why why why can't you stay with me?"
"because," he says, "i look in your eyes and i see your sanity slipping away."
she sobs, letting her tears fall into his hair. "i love you, beck."
but this time, it is him who cannot remember the words.
the hospital lets beck out, but he is more broken then ever before.
they tell him to try to find things to keep him busy, so beck and tori go to the beach and play in the sand and the salty water stings their skin.
he gets up and walks away from her, and she knows she should let him be, but she catches up to him and kisses him because she's forgotten the words.
they have sex in his abandoned RV, and everything in it is covered in dust and all the lamps have broken lights. he breaks her so many times with his forehead covered in sweat and his eyes full of malice and then suddenly, she screams out, not in pleasure but in sheer pain.
it's like a ton of bricks have fallen on her chest, breaking her ribs and she can't breathe because there's no air left in the room. beck stops pounding into her, pulls out and gasps. tori's wound is bleeding viciously, and beck didn't even know he was pushing his fingernails in to make it worse.
he pulls away from her, his eyes filled with tears, "oh god, oh god, oh god. tori, i'm so sorry."
but this time, tori vega doesn't accept his apologies. she cries into his dusty comforter, the scent of jade still lingering oh so very faintly and lets herself remember no matter how hard she tries, beck oliver will never truly be hers.
beck holds her, whispering how he couldn't handle life anymore. and she cries, wanting to make him leave, wanting to stay here in his arms forever, wanting him to see light in the world again. he goes to find something for her wound.
and when he's looking, tori runs away in the night, her shorts riding up her legs, her bikini top a little too loose and her shirt crinkled. her shoes are sitting in beck's RV, waiting for him to grab them and return them to his princess.
tori returns to her paranoid parents because they have just returned and where have you been and are you okay and oh my god why are you bleeding?
tori turns to them and says as softly as possible, "i need to get away."
and suddenly she's got a ticket to go to shinyshiny new york. and she has a hotel reservation, and maybe you can get a summer job, her parents say, you might like that.
tori smiles, already retreating to her room to pack, "thank you. thankyouthankyouthankyou."
10 MISSED CALLS.
1 NEW MESSAGE
Tori, I love you. Please, forgive me. I can't lose you.
she flies away to new york, keeping her phone in her bag and a pay as you go phone in her hand. the pay as you go phone only has four numbers: Trina, Home, Grandma, and Beck.
she never uses the last one, but it keeps her mind grounded, even though she memorized his number long ago.
she works for a fashion company. she never ever wears tank tops even though it feels like a thousand degrees. suddenly, she's offered a spot on the catwalk and she is handed a sleeveless dress and she cries as she shows her arm. the makeup artists take her gently away and they lightly dust glitter on her wound, to make it shine.
it hurts a little when they put her on first, letting all those people see, but then people slowly clap and she struts because nothing as ever felt this beautiful. (well except for the way her prince charming used to look at her: as if he had struck gold.)
her picture is in all the magazines and she receives a call at work, from none other than prince charming.
"why the hell did you run away to new york?"
she doesn't cry, but then she lets herself go, "run away with me."
and when she hangs up, she feels invincible.
the next day, beck has arrived with a bag in his hand and a smile on his face.
"tori," he says.
she jumps into his embrace even though she told herself she wouldn't and away from all the mess, and the memories, she thinks she can see beck smiling.
"i love you," he says, and then they're going out to dinner and he tells her everything he loves about her and before she can think, he's whispering, "i feel happy again."
and then he's off auditioning for a play and there is only a little time of summer left but she calls her parents and she says, "i want to stay here."
and they tell her that it's out of the question, living in a hotel with beck but then she says, "this is where i want to be."
so her parents buy her an apartment for a graduation present (the graduation she missed) and tori and beck live in their comfy home, evading the past and trying to live in the present.
beck gets movies and tori keeps modeling.
and a girl who's not there always is watching, waiting in every role and every dress and it scares them more than they'd admit.
they remember the words and then, there's a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.