Garfield: First Blood Part II: The Legend of the Warrior of the Forever Fist

It was a bright morning full of rain and sun when Natalie Portman was doing her acting.

"These are my words and my motions are full of emotion." Said Natalie Portman with acting.

"Excellence! This is Oscar winning performance!" Said the director with compliments.

"Thank you I am four star actress." Said Natalie Portman with thanks.

Then all of a sudden out of mist Ashton Kutcher appeared with sinister plans.

"Haha Natalie Portman you will star in me with movies and be forever mine! Then I will have immortality!" Cackled Ashton Kutcher with evil.

"No Ashton Kutcher I will not give in to your evil." Cried out Natalie Portman in defiance.

"Haha You have no say in this! You are my prisoner! Behold force field!" Said Ashton Kutcher as he summoned a force field prison to capture Natalie Portman.

"Now to my studio lair where we will star in movies together!" Declared Ashton Kutcher with evil as he left with imprisoned Natalie Portman.

Meanwhile Garfield was riding alone on all American highway on his Custom Harley Davidson motorcycle rockin out to DIO turned up to maximum volume.

"Time to train the muscles." Said Garfield as he pulled into a gym for training.

Garfield went to the punching bag for punching practice. It was punching bag made of diamond and steel so it can take his super punches which are like force of nature.

"I am fist. Mighty with speed." Garfield said as he punched the punching bag.

As Garfield practiced his punches news reports came on the TV.

"This just in. Ashton Kutcher has tweeted he has kidnapped Natalie Portman for evil movies. If only a hero was man enough to save her." Said the news man with reporting.

"INDIGNITIES." Roared Garfield as he punched the punching bag in half with ease at the anger of the reporting.

Garfield waltzed out of gym in quest to rescue Natalie Portman with his manly power. Outside of gym Garfield was confronted with thugs.

"Haha Garfield we were sent by Ashton Kutcher to be putting stop to you. Now is the time for endings!" Said the thugs with arrogant laughs.

"The only thing being stopped is your life! Eat fist!" Roared Garfield with anger.

The thugs then attacked Garfield with foolishness. One thug swung a chain at him the other hit him with a baseball bat, but it was no use. They bounced off Garfields muscles like rubber ball on a donkey.

"WHAT?" Cried out the thugs in shocking disbelief.

"My turn miscreants." Said Garfield has he lifted one thug above his head.

"Time to make a wish." Said Garfield as he snapped the thug in two.

After the thug snapping, Garfield turned to other thug with vengeance.

"Garfield please spare my life I am poor starving man." Said the thug with begging.

"Starve on my fist." Said Garfield as he punched the thugs stomach out.

Garfield then hopped on his Custom Harley Davidson motorcycle and revved the engines to rescue the Natalie Portman.

"Ashton Kutcher I hope your heart is in good health because I am going to rip it out of your chest." Garfield said as he put his shades on and rode off for rescue.

As Garfield rode, a Tractor Trailer truck filled with lasagna drove beside him.

"Lasagna feed my body and soul. Give me strength to rescue ladies in danger." Garfield said as he looked to the truck.

Lasagna burst out of truck to feed Garfield and entered his mouth for eating, filling Garfields muscular body with power and energy.

"Thank you Lasagna you are now part of me." Garfield said with gratitude to lasagna.

In the distance Garfield spotted trouble. It was a tank filled with vile minions of Ashton Kutcher.

"Behold Garfield our beast of iron and metal. You ride ends here Garfield for we are righteous." Said the tank commander with taunts.

At villains petty taunts Garfield laughed with scoffing. He turned on his DIO beyond maximum volume and glared at foolish tank with fiery eyes.

"Rust in peace, iron beast." Garfield said to the tank as he rode right through the tank at laser speed splitting it in half.

Meanwhile in Ashton Kutchers demon lair evil was brewing in hearts of men. Ashton Kutcher was sitting on his throne dressed like wicked sultan while Natalie Portman was chained to the wall.

"Haha Natalie Portman you are mine on this midnight hour. All of your hope should be abandoned for I am your new master!" Cackled Ashton Kutcher with evil.

"No Garfield will save me for he is true hero of man." Natalie Portman said with hope.

"Hoho not even Garfields manliness can save you now. We will star in movies and makes eons of money." Declared Ashton Kutcher with maniac laughing.

"Garfield please come I need you." Natalie Portman said with longing.

Meanwhile Garfield was riding the lonely road of the hero with hair blowing through wind like wet lasagna in a fan. In the distance Garfield saw Ashton Kutchers palace of pain and evil. It was on Island surrounded by lava and crocodiles. There seemed no way but Garfield never gives up never surrenders.

"Time to do the sky bird." Garfield declared as he pulled out his lasagna glider and glided to island of Ashton Kutcher.

Garfield crashed into room full of Ashton Kutchers loyal guards who would fight in his name to the deaths, but Garfield was not afraid.

"I heard there was party so I stopped by. Do not worry I am polite guest here are some presents." Quipped Garfield a she took out his Desert Eagles and fired at guard scum.

"My goody bag will be your beating heart Ashton Kutcher!" Garfield shouted with adrenaline pumping.

Garfield searched Ashton Kutchers palace mowing down guards wherever he saw with no mercy. He then came upon doors to Ashton Kutchers throne room but it was sealed with evil power and locks. But Garfield blew it open with ease like big bad wolf blowing down straw houses.

"I am here for the Natalie Portman and for your head on stick." Garfield roared upon entering Ashton Kutchers throne room.

Inside room Garfield saw Natalie Portman chained in imprisonment and Ashton Kutcher sitting on throne.

"Haha Garfield I have been waiting for you. Not even you can be stopping me now." Ashton Kutcher cackled with evil.

"Silence you sultan of sin. Your time is ending near!" Garfield responded with angry vocals.

"Garfield I had enough of your words. Time for fiery doom! Meet the dragon!" Ashton Kutcher said as he whistled for his dragon. At Ashton Kutchers whistling a four headed dragon appeared with fire breathing and roars.

"Enjoy your just deserts!" Ashton Kutcher cackled as he fled like little girl.

"Haha Garfield! I am hoping you brought your bib because I am going to be smoking you like a ham!" Growled the evil four headed dragon.

"I have no time for dragon distraction." Fumed Garfield with frustration.

All hope seemed to be in fire but then familiar voice was heard by all.


It was Jon Arbuckle flying in on jet pack rearing for fighting!

"Do not worry I will take care of this lizard you must go after Ashton Kutcher." Said Jon Arbuckle with support.

"Thank you Jon Arbuckle you are my jet pack backup." Garfield said with gratitude.

Garfield went after Ashton Kutcher as Jon Arbuckle battled dragon with mystic blade.

"Ok dragon boy let's do this." Jon Arbuckle said as he drew his mystic katana.

Meanwhile Garfield was chasing down Ashton Kutcher with justice on mind and in fist. He finally cornered Ashton Kutcher against wall.

"You are at the end of your highway and it is time to pay the toll man." Said Garfield with eyes glaring.

"Haha Garfield it is too late. Natalie Portman soul is mine and my life will be immortal!" Ashton Kutcher declared with vile grin.

"Fool your life is short, but my fist is FOREVER." Garfield roared as he charged inner power to max and sent fists flying at Ashton Kutcher at earthquake speed making him supernova.

"NOOOO." Cried out Ashton Kutcher as he supernovad.

"Your career just exploded." Quipped Garfield with cleverness.

"Thank you Garfield you saved me again." Thanked Natalie Portman with joyful words.

"No problem honeybabes. I can not stand seeing ladies kidnapped." Garfield said as he helped Natalie Portman up.

"Good work Garfield. You saved day again." Said approaching voice. It was Jon Arbuckle! He was holding dragons heads in his hands.

"Yes Jon Arbuckle I think it is time for celebration." Said Garfield in response.

"Yes Garfield we should perform our hit new song for Natalie Portmans music enjoyment." Jon Arbuckle suggested with good ideas as he took out his electric guitar for jamming.

"Yes here is our new song "Lover and Fighter Man." From album of same name. Old people with diseases should beware of dangerous rocking." Said Garfield as he took out his mic ready for rocking.

Jon Arbuckle began powerful chords of playing while Garfield began to sing with mighty rocking voice:

"I am real man hard like steel

Always hungry for lasagna meal

Busting heads winning every fight

Need to see you naked tonight

I am a Lover and Fighter man

Not a loser and crier man

Baby, Bake me egg in a friar pan

Because I am a lover and fighter man

Every day I am punching and kicking

When I come home I want you for licking

Stupid thugs their heads I crack

But you I want to rub my back

I am a Lover and Fighter Man

Not a loser and crier man

I want to spank you until you tan

Because I am a lover and fighter man"

Jon Arbuckle then began shredding like madman with guitar solo.

"AMAKOOOOOOO." Shouted Jon Arbuckle as flames and lightning burst out of his guitar. After amazing guitar solo Garfield began to sing again:

"I am the champ in the ring

In the bedroom I am king

Bashing villains until they groan

Loving ladies until they moan

I am a lover and fighter man

Not a loser and Crier man

I will make you fly like Peter Pan

Because I am a lover and fighter man"

Natalie Portman screamed and clapped in excitement at the rocking concert. She ran to Garfield with love in her eyes.

"Garfield you are rock star stud muffin. But now I want you to play me like an electric guitar and make me wail." Natalie Portman said with desire.

"Sure thing sugarbites. I have a concert in my pants and you have first row tickets." Garfield said with flirty words.

"Let us go on stage and make music." Said Natalie Portman as she led Garfield to her bedroom.

Garfield and Natalie Portman went on her bed and embraced for love makings. They rubbed eachother with oil and perfume and touched eachother all over. Their bodies then joined like peanut butter and jelly and created delicious loving all night long.

The End..?

Authors Note: Congratulations to Natalie Portman for her pregnancies! Please beware and do not let Ashton Kutcher kidnap your babies. Also I am still single so it is still ok if you would like to date me.