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rated M

prompts - beginning, hopeful

It had been one of those weird nights.

Hopeful initially. Resigned eventually. Kind of a sour feeling.

Bella hadn't meant to have expectations; they'd just formed on their won. In fact, she hadn't realized she'd had any until they hadn't been met.

So here she was, tired and vaguely hung over, waiting for the bus in the too bright bleached out sunlight.

Even though she had a car.

The bus pulled up, eventually. Bella didn't know if it was on time or not. She simply got on and sat down.

There weren't that many people on the bus. Probably because it was New Year's Day. Perhaps more businesses were closed, more people home.

Bella watched closely for her stop, not too familiar with the bus route. She made her way to the front, mumbled goodbye to the driver, and got off.

Walked four blocks south.

Alice's car was parked beside hers in the driveway.

The house smelled like lavender cleaning stuff and burnt-oil-pancake-something.

"Hey." Bella dropped on to the couch, careful to leave her shoes by the door. Alice was mopping…Swiffering...whatever.

"Hey!" Alice appeared. She looked concerned. And tired, like Bella. "What happened last night? I didn't see you after…"

She didn't finish; she didn't have to.

Bella sighed, putting her feet up. She should help Alice clean the house. It would help to focus on things other than last night and him.

"Did you stay with Edward?" Alice prodded, cocking her head in expectation.

Bella shrugged, and nodded.


"But when I woke up he was gone. And so was his car. And so was my ride."

Yes, waking up in Edward's brother's girlfriend's house had been even lamer than it sounded.

"Did you guys –"


"Oh." Alice looked relieved. She came closer and sat down, wedging the Swiffer between her knees.

Bella swallowed, disliking the way that morning's vulnerability was creeping back in. "Still."

"Yeah. That's just… I'm surprised," Alice said.

"Me too."

"So tell me, from the beginning. What happened?" Alice brushed her hair from her eyes. Her hair was short and her ponytails always fell loose. "You guys went outside to talk?"

"Sort of. I mean, I followed him outside. He was in a bad mood. Something crappy at work earlier," Bella said, trying to explain even though she needed explanations of her own.

"Was he drunk?" Alice asked.

"Just drinking. Like me." Bella paused, frowning. "He finally started talking after a while… and then it was just like before. Easy. Midnight hit and he kissed me, like really kissed me."

"Did you kiss him back?"

"What do you think?"

"So, you guys were kissing…"

"And then he acted like he had to go. I would've let him go, even though it was early, but he asked if I wanted to come. That's when I texted you to say I was leaving."

Alice nodded. "I thought maybe you were coming home. I didn't know if you were sick… or bored…"

"I was a little bored, but I would've stayed if he hadn't asked..."

"So you left."

"We left…went to this girl Rose's house. I guess Emmett's with her. They were leaving when we showed up, but they let us in and said we could stay."

This is where things got even weirder for Bella. For as long as she had known Edward, and as many false starts and good times and bad times and conversations and kisses as they'd had, sometimes she felt like she really didn't know him at all. She wished she didn't care for him the way she did. Sometimes it felt like it was poisoning her, the not knowing, the hoping, the wanting, the back and forth.

"I wanted to talk… but he kissed me and then things went from there."

Alice nodded knowingly. "Did he –"


"Was it good?"

Bella warmed, and chuckled at Alice's shiny eyed mischief.


"And then you fell asleep?"

"Yes. And woke up alone. I didn't even know what street I was on."

"What a dick."

Bella stood up. "Did you just start mopping?"

"I'm almost done."

"What needs to be done?"


back for the new year, whoot.

i plan to do these every night except for sunday (our "day off") and tuesday (that's when i post starry eyed inside, and i prefer to focus on that, for that day.) there might even be mondays i don't post a witfit for that same reason; because i'm working on SEI.

much love.