Disclaimer: I don't own the Hunger Games, I am not Susan Collins.
A/N: Well, this is my first fanfiction. I wanted to imagine what it was like for Katniss when she was having her first baby. It takes place after Mockingjay but before the Epilogue. Read & Review? Enjoy (:
I don't even remember the nightmare that forced me from my sleep. The only thing I could register was the fact that Peeta wasn't in the bed next to me and I was petrified. The worst case scenarios were rushing through my head. In a fit of panic, I called out his name. When I received no response, my worries continued. I wiped the small beads of sweat from my forehead and quickly scrambled to get out of the cocoon of sheets I was tangled in. Before my feet could touch the cold, hardwood floor, I heard the sound of footsteps racing towards the door. I could feel the adrenaline beginning to course through me and then I was on my feet, rushing to the door to get out of the house before whoever took Peeta came back for me.
However, when I reached the door to the bedroom I collided into another person's body and my hysteria only worsened as I fell to the floor. At least if they take me, I'll be with Peeta. That was a hopeful thought, my guesses were that whoever this person was who would take me away from my semi-peaceful life was never going to let me see him again.
I looked up when I felt a pair of hands touching my arms. "Katniss, are you okay? I'm sorry, I didn't know you would wake up." Then I was met with his eyes and relief flooded through my body.
"Peeta!" I practically screamed while I engulfed his body with my arms. Then came the waterworks. "Don't do that to me again! I thought you were gone, that somebody took you-" he pressed his lips against mine forcefully, but as I calmed down he began to pull away.
"You don't have to worry so much. Nobody is going to try to take me away from you...and even if somebody tried, I would never let them." I sighed out of a mixture of contentment and an attempt to catch my breath from both crying and kissing. He helped me off the floor without another word and lead me back to bed. Once I was settled back into his arms, he reached over and wiped the drying tears off my cheeks.
"Where did you go?" I whispered, fighting off sleep.
"I just needed to think straight." He answered simply, though I knew there was more to it than that. But, I didn't push it. Peeta always tells me things when he's ready to. So we stayed how we were, in silence. I was too anxious to allow myself to fall back asleep, so to occupy my time, I counted the number of heartbeats I could hear with my head against his chest.
"You love me, real or not real?" I looked up, expecting to see his face painted with concentration, thought it was just the opposite. His face was soft, and I was confused, mainly because he hadn't asked me this particular question in a few years.
"Real." I answered quietly and pressed a kiss on his lips. He sighed when I pulled away and dropped his head down onto the pillow.
"What's wrong?" I asked while shifting so I could look at his face. He remained quiet before he turned his head to look at me a minute or two later.
"I hate the fact that there are times when I can't remember who you really are or what you mean to me." He spoke softly and it was like a knife through my heart to see him upset.
"I know, it's tough. But...I'll always be here to bring you back to me. I promise." I attempted to comfort him, but it seemed to fail.
"I just frustrates me that you have to do that. I wish there could be something, just one thing, in my life that I was absolutely sure about." That's when I caught on to his hidden meaning. That's why he wasn't here when I woke up, that's why he was trying to sort things out before. He had me, and though he felt he was sure about me all the time, there was still moments where the Capitols shiny memories came back to haunt him. That something that he wanted to feel sure about was a baby. And here I was thinking we were past this.
I sighed and rested my head against his chest. We were married for so long, it was just us in this house all alone, with the occasional visit from a somewhat sober Haymitch. After this long, how could we even adjust to a new life in our mess of life? Maybe you're just being selfish now. After all, wasn't that what you were fighting for all those years ago, a chance for Peeta to live and a better place for him to live in with his children? I had to shake my head for the voice in my head to stop nagging me. Though, it was right. I was trying to give him a better place to live in where his children could be safe. Didn't I accomplish that? Weren't we finally safe?
"Peeta?" I questioned, feeling myself filled with this sudden sense of courage. If I didn't go through with this now, I don't think I ever would have. He hummed in response. "Do you..." Don't chicken out. I swallowed even though my mouth was dry. "Do you still want to have a baby?" I asked getting quieter with every word. I was looking anywhere but his eyes just waiting for a response, maybe I was hoping for the rejection.
My plan to advert his gaze failed when he placed his thumb and index finger on my chin to make me look at him. He was wearing a smile that could light up a room. That's what I hated, because once I saw that smile, there was no backing out for me. "Of course I still want a baby." I saw his smile falter some as he tried to word his next sentence. "Do you want one?"
I looked back into his eyes and saw that smile that was making it's way back onto his face and before I could even reason with myself, I answered, "Yes." Then that was it, he pressed his lips to mine and placed his hand on the back of my head. I felt that feeling in the pit stomach rising to spread throughout the rest of my body. I went to pull away to sort out the situation in my head but he pressed my lips back to his hungrily. I decided to just give up with the reasoning and complied, running my hands through his hair and pressing my body even closer to his. I felt his finger tips moving on my skin and I didn't even try to stop the moan that he used as an advantage to slip his tongue into my mouth.
I didn't realize he had shifted us so that he was pinning me against our bed until I felt what little clothing I had on beginning to peel off my body by his hands. His lips were everywhere and my breathing was reduced to pants as I tried to focus myself. It only took a second for Peeta to remove his boxers and then his lips were on mine again. I moved my legs so he could kneel in between them and laced my fingers together behind his neck, just begging him to be closer to me.
"Are you absolutely sure?" Peeta whispered into my ear, breaking me from this trance I seemed to be in as I gave into his wishes. I nodded frantically and then entered that state of ecstasy that I loved a little bit too much.