Title: it's a tangled rat's nest
Fandom: Party Down
Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Party Down.
A/N: Okay, I honestly have no idea where the fuck this came from, nor do I really care, though; Casey/Henry are seriously one of my top ships, so the fact that there is pretty much nothing fandomy out there for them is sad. This is pretty sucky, however, so sorry for that. And if you're wondering, I couldn't think of a name for said fic, so I just stole a line from MouseRat's "Sex Hair". Please don't kill me for mixing fandoms…
The truth is, for Henry, being with Casey is his only option - the only fucking chance he has at ever finding some sort of happiness - no, that's not right; she's his only chance at not being unhappy, because while he wouldn't consider his life horrible (seeing as horrible tends to be reserved for people who are, like, raped or attempting to nurse their dying child back to safety), the whole word happiness sort of implies that his world has an all-around good feeling about it, and that certainly isn't the case, is it? It's more like his life is really boring, lame, and depressing, and Casey isn't boring, lame, or depressing (well, she is, but to a lesser extent), so that right there is something to look forward to every day.
But the thing is, she's not his girlfriend, or his wife or even soul mate (diffidently not soul mate), so even though she's efficiently making his world suck less, he's not supposed to notice. And the same goes for whenever she makes him smile or happy, or think his life is worth something (anything); like she said when this whole thing started, they don't owe each other anything.
So when Casey leaves, Henrys not supposed to care, because he doesn't have any right to.
(But the thing is, he does.)
Uda is alright. She's got her shit, like a kid who doesn't like him and a job that kind of makes him feel worse about his own (and the whole abrasive thing, because despite what she told him at the wedding, Uda is in fact that abrasive, all the time), but it's all shit he can handle relatively easily. And with her, Henry doesn't have to pretend not to notice when she makes him feel good or bad or whatever; it's all out there! He always heard people talk about how it's easier when you're just fucking, because there's less emotion involved, but for Henry it was the opposite; how are you supposed to know where your relationship stands if you never talk about feelings ever? (Cause even though Henry is a guy, and thus doesn't want to talk about feelings all the time, he has fully accepted that for a relationship to last longer than a couple weeks, talks about feelings must be had. And the whole thing with Casey most defiantly didn't change his mind.)
But for a while, the thing with Uda is good. She's kind of nice and the sex is okay (it was better with Casey, but Henry tries not to read much into it), and for a bit, it's nice to pretend he's the sort of guy who watches The Mentalist and has a future full of promise and hope (he knows he doesn't.)
And than, of course, Casey comes back.
His mom always told him never to roll the dice, that it only leads to negative things, and now, mid-thirties and a failed actor, Henry has to admit she was on to something; what did taking a risk ever get him? A job at a failing catering company, that's what.
But the whole Casey thing is different. It's defiantly a roll of the dice, Henry can certainly see that, but it's also the kind of dice that he feels, if not rolled, will be regretted later. Uda is nice and stable, but her kid doesn't like him and her job makes him feel bad, and dammit!, the whole abrasive, all the time thing is really fucking annoying.
So in the end, it doesn't really matter that Casey's clearly got a commitment problem, and that Henry thinks she's a roll the dice; they both make each others lives not suck, and there's no use in pretending otherwise.