"I need to ask you a question." Emily looked at her friend and ex girlfriend, in the middle of their studying.

"Okay…" Maya looked at Emily thrown off slightly that the question needed to have a warning attached. Then she smirked, "What?" She asked, turning herself to fully face her friend and ex girlfriend.

"Remember when we were…" Emily's sentence wasn't finished when her voice gave away.

"Together?" Maya supplied, an uncharacteristically goofy smile on her lips.

"Yeah- um," Emily was completely memorized by Maya's smile, so she slightly shook head, trying to get the ever-present want out of her head for once. "That."

Maya's stomach dropped at Emily's words. That. Her smile was whipped away,

"What did you want to ask?" Maya tried to get back to her books, not looking at Emily anymore.

Her hand rested hesitantly over Maya's thigh, but she pulled away almost instantly. Maya had felt and saw her hand hovering, and was looking at her again.

"What did it mean to you?" Emily asked, biting on her bottom lip.

"You know." Maya whispered, her voice impossibly small.

"No, Maya," Emily's voice wasn't demanding, but it wasn't helpless either, "I don't know." It was a confession, "I've never understood…" Emily trailed off, and this time Maya didn't help her finish her sentence.

"What?"

"What that meant to you." She repeated her question, "What this"- she gestured between them- "Means to you."

"If you don't know, then you don't want to." Maya mumbled, uncharacteristically losing her confidence.

"But I- I need to." Emily admitted, "I need to know it wasn't just an experiment- a fling- for you. Please, just tell me what you… felt… with me."

"Are you seriously doubting my feelings? After I- I…" It was Maya who didn't finish her sentence, this time. She closed her eyes before continuing,

"Why don't you trust me? I tried. I tried to make it work. I guess they were right…"

"You think I used you? Emily, my intentions were pure."

"What were they, though, Maya? Just tell me."

"I… I had a crush on you. I acted it on it."

"A crush? An innocent, small crush?" Emily questioned.

"I wouldn't call it small, Em. More like huge."