those letters that were never sent
(a fairy tale without a happy ending)
hey, colour wolf,
You're not worth it, they tell me.
(of course, the main person telling me that is the main person I'd like to forget, but it's true nonetheless.)
You're just a pretty boy and what can you do? Sure, you can play Quidditch like no sixth year I've ever seen, and you're in Advanced Potions, but that doesn't mean you're any better than me.
(though, of course, you've managed to make everyone fall in love with you at some time or another)
Except those that are headstrong. I'd suppose I don't fall into that category because I just can't help myself. Is that so wrong? Is that worthy of being shunned?
I'm young; I still have my life ahead of me. The Holy Father up there has a plan for me. Me, I'll probably find love a thousand-and-one times before I find the one I'm meant for. Whoever that is. That's what they all tell me. But does it really matter?
I still like you.
Is that bad? It's not like it was ever a conscious decision. I wish, really, boy, I do. But honestly, if it was a conscious decision, it wouldn't be you. Not you, with your slicked-back blonde hair and deep grey eyes…
(curse you, teenage hormones)
But, I mean, why would you shun someone for a harmless crush?
Harmless. Yeah, right. Maybe for you. But not for my strangely fragile heart.
(ever since I met you, y'know)
My grandparents are super-ecstatic-happy that I've finally found someone to like. They don't know you, do they? They've never met you. Those two have never talked to you about trivial things like bands and Quidditch teams like I have.
(but, I'm sure that's not so special. I'm sure all too many people have done that.)
I'm just the girl in the background. What am I to you? Have you ever noticed me? I'm standing in the back ground, can't you see? What am I to you other than a few fleeting smiles and a couple of kind words? What am I to you other than someone to joke with?
(nothing, that's what. I'm nothing.)
It's my fault and I know it. You know it. I never should have let my heart go in this deep. But I was convinced it was harmless and maybe you would like me back.
(you led me wrong, boy)
I wish I was too good for you. All I can do is sit here and write my heart out. I love writing, you know that. It makes me feel like I can finally tell everything to someone. Someone who's not going to laugh, someone who's not going to criticize me for feeling this way, because I really can't help it that I get hurt this easily.
I'm a wimp to you, probably. I'm sorry about that.
But, boy, so what if I'm different? Is that so wrong? I'm just me and you're just you.
(or are you?)
from that different girl
(hey, pretty boy, do you ever notice me?)
dear pretty boy,
You're just a heart stealer. I hadn't realized it before, but even if you don't mean to, you lead people on. You led me on. I was under the impression that I had a chance, but I was wrong, again.
(and this time, there's only this (fake) version of you to tell my thoughts to)
No matter how much I wish you would, you'd never think of me that way. I'm just a little loud, annoying girl.
And, apparently, though you don't realize it (I'm not really good at anything, you say about yourself) you're somewhere near amazing. You can dance, you can do Quidditch very well, your studying is (not bad), and you are good in Potions (pretty much top of the class). Transfiguration and Language are only two little subject areas, you do realize that? And those are my strong areas, in case you haven't noticed.
(do opposites balance each other out?)
You're the long end of the stick, and I'll probably end up with the short end.
According to my friends, you're just a (follower). Well, you know, it's true. It's not like you come up with anything you do on your own, and you're scared to do (almost) anything because you're scared of what they'll say. It's not all about them, you know.
(but then again, what can I say? I'm a follower too, sometimes)
It isn't like that many people care about your (love life). Maybe your friends do, and I do, and those other girls do, but really, would you rather be sort of happy and get grief from your friends or live in solitude forever? Isn't that some excess form of peer pressure? Or maybe it's reverse peer pressure, I'd suppose.
You've always been in the shadows, haven't you? Probably there are people that are better than you at Quidditch, I'd suppose. But guess what? Unless you're top of the world, there's always going to be people better than you. There are people that are so much better than me at writing. But I don't care. If it's what I enjoy, then that's what I'm going to do. Even though I'm not that good at it, anyway.
(but let's not talk about me, this one's for you)
Why am I writing this anyway? I'll never send it to you, and you'd (never ) want to read it. I can just imagine your reaction to it. You'd probably hate me for the rest of my life. And what have I done to you, other than have an (innocent) crush on you? I suppose I'm a bit of a strange one, and I can get a bit annoying.
(but you didn't hate me before, why now?)
I'm going to tell you (someday), and you're going to hate me, just because with the two of us and our twisted fairytale that's the way it goes.
If you were Prince Charming, you'd play the role (fairly) perfectly. I'd just be the Cinderella, lurking in the shadows but not speaking my mind, because I'm just a peasant and there are plenty of princesses out there just waiting for you.
(but that's the way it goes, and always will)
love, the peasant girl
(you make breaking hearts look so easy, seems like you've done this before. you've got breaking hearts all but down, you've done this, you've done this before. you make stealing hearts look so easy, where is the boy i adore? you've got breaking up all but down, and i can't love a thief anymore)
on the first girl
dear heart breaker,
Everybody wants to know why you like her. I mean, honestly, I'm not trying to be offensive. She's my friend, you know. But it was just kind of random and everything.
(everybody knew that you wouldn't last long)
I knew. Did you know that I placed a bet on how long you would last? A week, I said, at most. She wanted to break up with you. Sadly (for you), I didn't tell her not to. A part of me hidden (deep) inside wanted you two to break up. It was selfish, I know, and I'm sorry. But that wasn't the main reason. It was the right thing to do.
Would you have wanted to keep going out with a girl who liked other guys at the same time? She was having that obsession phase with another guy while she was 'going out' with you. At the same time you were (blind) to everything that was going on.
It's not her fault, of course. Don't blame her. It's just part of us, the (complex) organisms known as females.
(i thought it was funny, but you might not)
The breakup didn't go the way we'd carefully planned. It was so random, so spontaneous- and I was hiding in the bushes, watching, waiting. I wasn't that happy, as happy as I probably should have been. Obviously, you wouldn't move on to me. You never would. There are too many female fish in the sea here.
All of us read those owls you sent up to our tower, did you know that? Hilariously enough, she didn't want to reply. We made her. Again, she was tired; it wasn't really her that's to blame. It was freaking one o' clock in the morning! Why you thought it was a good idea, I'll never know. I guess you thought it would make a point. It did.
(but to the wrong people)
She started to like you again, you know. It was interesting, hearing her obsess about holding your hand. Kissing you was also a favourite of her obsessions. You know, I was sort of worried that she would get back together with you, and boom, crushed again. But (delightfully) that never happened.
(you cut your hair again, and just like that her obsession was gone)
I was glad for it, that she was totally, completely over you, and then eventually you moved on too. Does that make you a playboy? I mean, you moved on pretty fast. But then again, so did she, even a bit faster than you. So I suppose it's okay, player. They'll keep teasing you for a while.
(but at least you're over her)
Maybe I'm wrong; maybe you two are right for each other. Maybe you're right for someone else. So why am I stuck on you?
(the mysteries of the world）
sincerely, the girl who watches
(hey, playboy, it's about time, and your time's up. i had to do this one for my girls, you know. sometimes you gotta act like you just don't care. that's the only way you boys learn.)
on the second girl
So now, you might be on to girl two. At least, that's what she seems to think. She sort of has the impression that you two are joined at the hip or something. I'm not sure if you think that. I'm not sure what you think. Boy, you have one of the most complex brains in the world. You're not too obvious, and I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad one.
Now, she? She's easy to figure out. It's obvious that she likes you. She's all over you all the time. Is that annoying? Well, it is to me, but that might be because… I don't know. Is it jealousy to just want her away from you? I'm not sure if I want to touch you like that because it is really strange to me. A foreign concept, you might say.
(hey, I'm not her. In case you couldn't tell.)
And you know, I don't want you to like her.
Did you know that she's known I like you? Ever since…forever ago, last year. Middle of last year, I'd say, so about a year ago she found out. Then, this year, she decided (out of all the cute and adorable boys in the school) that she decided she was going to get you to like her. She decided that you're perfect, but not for her.
(perfect to add to her popularity at the school and up her status)
Sounds like a nice girl, doesn't it?
Seriously, are you only focusing on appearance? I'd suppose she's okay on the eyes, I'm not a guy or gay, so I can't really say. But her personality is kind of… I'm not going to bad mouth her. That's not what I'm writing this for.
What I mainly want to know is if you like her and why. Do you think she likes that other guy? Well, she's trying to 'attract' you, and get you to like her in a month or whatever. So I don't think she likes him. But you know, she's been hurting him in the process, and me. She's been rubbing it, the fact that she (might just) like you and that you (might just) like her in my face for what feels like forever. Do you think it's fun?
Not that you care, anyway.
(you don't care much about me, as I've stated before. But this is about her right now.)
She's the definition of playgirl, falling for one guy after another, and possibly multiple guys at the same time. Her 'guy' list ranges from the ages of 10 to 25, and yes, these are not celebrities. You know, if you (a playboy) get with a playgirl, it won't end well. Just listen to me for once. Oh yeah, you don't do that.
(you two wouldn't last long either, just trust me. I said that you and the first girl wouldn't last too long either and you guys didn't last over two weeks)
love, the hopefully deep(er) girl
(is anybody out there? hello, hello! broken hearts like promises are meant for lesser knowns)
Guess you've heard by now that I'm leaving in a few months.
(not that you care, anyway)
But yeah, so I'll have to say goodbye to you for the last time. You won't care, but I will. And it will make it so much harder if I know you like her. The first her, or the second her, or any her but the me her. And I'm not trying to say you should like me, because that'll (never) happen.
(i'm not sure if I'm going to. I might cry)
It doesn't matter, anyway. There are plenty of fish in the sea (but how many are right for me?) and I'll have a lot of new guys to scope out at my brand new school that I'll be attending for seventh year.
I won't have to worry about whether you like any of them. It won't bother me if you're dating someone I think you're not right for. It won't make a difference if you're flirting with another girl every other day.
(but right now, it does. A lot)
I guess now's the time that I should start to try to get over you. I mean, try. Did you know that I tried to get over you once?
(did you know that it didn't work? I suppose you did, or I wouldn't be writing this. I wish it had worked. Others had it work for them. But me, I'm just…special.)
Special girls are a treasure, right? Probably every special girl except me. I'm just…different, I suppose.
(is that so bad, pretty boy? Because, you're different too)
I'm the youngest girl in sixth year. I enjoy being loud and maybe funny. I love writing and the colour green, though I'm obviously not a Slytherin. Is that wrong? Am I wrong? Is everything about me wrong? It's hard being a girl, you know. Not that you'd know.
(i suppose I'm just different. One of these days that'll change)
Would you rather be a clone?
from, the girl who might move on one of these days
(how did you get here under my skin? swore that i'd never let you back in. should have known better than trying to let you go, cause here we go, go, go again. hard as i try, i know i can't quit. something about you is so addictive. we're falling together, you think that by now i'd know, cause here we go, go, go again)
A/N: Well, there's an attempt at romantic Rose/Scorpius. Sad, right? That's actually something I wrote about the guy I like and then changed up. My friend said it was so sad.
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