SHOPPING with WHACKADOODLE

If anyone had told Penny she would voluntary take Sheldon Cooper shopping she would have said "your nuts!"but here she was. When Sheldon had brought the subject up and lead with. "You owe me one", there was no way she could say no.

"Ok Sheldon I do need to go to the Mall anyway" (and truth be known, she owed Sheldon a lot more than one).

So here she was in Pottery Barn listening to Sheldon give a lecture to a totally bewildered sales assistant on why ' 100% cotton sheets were superior to synthetic sheets that they stocked'. Penny looked at her watch "Sheldon we need to go" Sheldon turned his head to look at Penny.

"Penny please this is important!"

Sheldon turned back to finish his lecture but the sales assistant had made good his escape and was nowhere to be seen.

"Ok Sheldon you've had your fun. Move!"

Penny pulled, pushed and coerced Sheldon out of the shop.

"Sheldon you've forgotten your shopping bag"

"I didn't buy anything, Penny"

"Sheldon, you're freaking kidding me right"

"Penny, why would I kid you /" Sheldon tilted his head and gave Penny his 'you know I'm right smile'.

"Just forget I said anything Sheldon"

"Penny I…"

Penny put her hand to her forehead 'why do I always fall for this'.

Penny cut him off "Yes! Sheldon IQ of six zillion and an eidetic memory I know you've told me"

"It's an IQ of 187 so just remember" Sheldon started walking back to the car.

Penny just stood still. Had Sheldon just made a funny? Sheldon looked over his shoulder "Bazinga".

Penny followed Sheldon back to the car shaking her head "WhackaDoodle".

Their next stop was the comic book store. Of course it was! Penny stayed in the car Stuart was ok but the others were kind of creepy. Sheldon came back, carrying his bag of new comic books.

"Find good comics Sheldon?" wait for it.

"Penny I've told you before they are comic books"

Later as Penny pulled in to the Mall parking lot again, Sheldon had a very pensive look on his face.

"Penny why precisely are we at the Mall once more?"

Penny smiled; it was her turn now "Sheldon I precisely don't know." Penny could not stop herself them laughing.

As Penny moved to get out of the car Sheldon sighed.

"Penny I'll stay in the car. I have my comic books"

Penny took up her oh' no you're not stance hands on hips and head tilted.

"Sheldon! It's midday. You have no water, and you hate opening the windows.

By the time I get back, you'll have cooked"

Penny could see slight panic on Sheldon's face.

"Yes it's possible you may be right".

Penny looked at Sheldon as he got out of the car and walked past her 'but Sheldon never admits if someone else is right'.

"Sheldon, hold up . I need a coffee before we do anything"

Sheldon stood in the doorway of Starbucks "Penny I'll wait here"

"Ok sweetie"

Penny knew not to push Sheldon about coming in, or God forbid, sitting down it was just not a Sheldon type place i.e. clean and orderly.

As Penny stood at the counter she was deep in thought Sheldon admitting he could be wrong wow! but Penny's train of thought was broken by a voice behind her "Well, well. If it's not sex on legs Penny"

Penny turned she knew who it was before she even looked.

"Hi Jason how you been" his sickly smile had not changed.

"Wow, Penny, you're still looking hot" he moved to put his arms around Penny's waist but Penny pulled away.

"Back off Jason- it was over a long time ago" He knew the look in Penny's eyes said trouble

"Hey, no problem. I heard you broke up with Kurt. I thought maybe we could hook up again"

Penny looked at him with his sickly open mouthed smile God what had she ever seen in him.

"That was a life time ago Jason I've moved on"

As Penny paid for her coffee, she saw Jason looking over to Sheldon who was nervously standing in the doorway. Jason started to laugh as Penny walked to the door.

"That your new fuck buddy Penny?"

Penny turned "Jason, you're a pig"

Penny was fighting back tears as she took hold of Sheldon's arm and led him out into the street.

" Penny what's wrong?" Sheldon had never been good reading so called 'emotions' but he knew Penny was upset, he had heard what the man at the counter had said but had no idea what it meant.

"Penny please"

Penny stopped and looked at Sheldon she tried to smile. Poor Sheldon. He didn't have a clue what had just happened.

"Sheldon when I first moved out here, I made a lot of mistakes. I mean a lot and he was one of them"

As Sheldon looked down at Penny, she saw his eyes were a deep powder blue, the corners of this mouth turned up slightly into a smile. Penny thought she could stand here looking into his eyes for ever.

"Penny, your friend back there how did he know you and I are friends?"

"No Sheldon he don't mean we were friends, he doesn't even know you"

"Ah that would account for his crude reference to you and I indulging in coitus"

"What! oh my God Sheldon why would you even think something like that"

"But you're I take it now ex' boyfriend asked you if I were your 'fu.." Penny cut Sheldon off.

"Yes Sheldon I heard what he said" Penny started to rub her forehead 'how am I going to explain this?

"I'm sorry Penny I took his clearly crude and ill-mannered question to mean he thought we were friends with benefits!"

Penny laughed she could not help herself if only Sheldon.

"Tell you what Sheldon, we'll 'Google' it once we get home"

Sheldon smiled, happy with Penny's answer.

Penny knew he would check Google anyway

As they entered the Mall, Sheldon started to walk more slowly.

"Do we have a problem Sheldon?"

"Penny, I do not relish the idea of walking around overpriced clothing outlets"

Penny looked at Sheldon giving him her 'I'm just a poor woman look'.

"Ple-eease' please' Sheldon just this once, after the coffee shop thing I need this. Please"

"Well it is just possible I may find something for myself."

As they walked about the Mall, Penny just moved from shop to shop trying anything shoes' coats dresses.

"Penny, you're not buying anything if you're short of funds?" Sheldon was confused and Sheldon hated being confused.

"Oh Sheldon, sweetie, it's not the buying it's just being here trying new things on but being with a friend always helps" Penny smiled at Sheldon and patted his arm.

"And thanks for offering to buy me something" Penny was laughing as she walked into the next store.

"Penny, are we almost done?"

"Yes Sheldon last shop"

As they walked about the store Sheldon asked "what is it we're looking for Penny?".

"We're looking for pyjamas Sheldon"

"For whom?" A look of panic on Sheldon's face.

"Who do you think? Me!"

"Oh yes I was forgetting you sometimes wear pyjamas"

Penny turned sharply and stood inches from Sheldon.

"You forgot? The beautiful mind of Sheldon Cooper forgot!"

"When I said forgot, well, YOU wear the silliest things for bed"

Penny just stood looking at Sheldon with her head tilted to one side and a big smile on her face.

If it were possible as Sheldon's face grew redder then Penny's smile grew bigger.

And now for the final push Penny thought.

"Sheldon how do you know what I wear for bed?"

"Laundry night"

Sheldon could hear Penny laughing as he walked away. He smiled he hated it when she was upset but he had managed to cheer her up.

"Penny, over here" Penny looked over to where Sheldon was standing. He was next to a rail of lingerie! and was holding up a tiny lace trimmed thing which was deep red and totally gorgeous.

"Nice idea, Sheldon but today I'm shopping for comfort not sex"

As Penny walked over to Sheldon, she took the little red thing from him to hang it back up. It was her size! Laundry night, again.

Penny picked out two nice fluffy comfortable sets of pyjamas.

She was able to cut Sheldon off as he headed for the bed linen department.

As Sheldon and Penny started to walk back to the car, Penny had her bag with her two pair of pyjamas plus a little lacy red outfit pushed to the bottom Penny looked at Sheldon's face and smiled. No harm in a girl dreaming.