Summary: To everyone else she was still the same old Saint Clare that she'd always been, but deep down, Clare Edwards knew she was nothing but trash. Sequel to "Just A Reminder".
Disclaimer: Don't own Degrassi. 'Nuff said.
Author's Note: I actually hadn't planned for this to be a sequel. It just sort of worked out that way. So… yeah. Hopefully, you guys enjoy.
By: Lady Azura
It was almost ten o'clock. Her mother had gone to bed not too long ago, and Clare knew that she should've been getting ready to retire for the night as well, but instead she found herself sitting at her desk, typing up an assignment for school. She was about halfway finished when a sudden buzzing noise shattered her concentration and drew her attention to her cell phone. She had a feeling she already knew who it was, but despite her better judgment, she flipped it open and read the message.
i need u
Fitz. There was no mistaking it. Clare sat back, biting the corner of her thumb as she contemplated what to do. After about a minute or so, she came to a decision - ignoring the small voice in the back of her head, screaming at her and trying to persuade her to do otherwise. She answered him quickly before snapping her phone shut and making her way over to her closet, homework forgotten.
Those were just some of the names that came to mind when she stared at herself in the mirror. Oh, sure, to everyone else she was still the same old Saint Clare that she'd always been, but deep down, Clare Edwards knew she was nothing but trash.
Sparing a brief glance at the clock, she gave herself another once-over before grabbing her purse and a sweater, and climbing out her bedroom window.
Fitz was already waiting for her when she arrived at his apartment twenty minutes later. He answered the door seconds after she knocked, and hurriedly ushered her inside. Clare barely had time to kick off her heels before Fitz had her pinned against the nearest wall.
In an instant, his mouth was on hers, forceful and demanding, and not at all like Eli's or KC's. Clare tried to respond to the kiss just as eagerly, but couldn't quite match Fitz's desperation. Her lips parted under his when his tongue sought entry, coaxing hers into a sinful dance. She let out a surprised squeal when he suddenly cupped her bottom and lifted her up; her legs went around his waist and she whimpered when she felt his arousal pressed against her center.
She broke the kiss, much to Fitz's obvious dismay. He looked about ready to protest, but she shifted her hips and his eyes grew wide before he buried his face in the crook of her neck. Taking a deep breath, his hands supported as he carried her to his bedroom; she clung to him all the while, locking her ankles together and gripping his shoulder blades. Fitz kicked the door shut behind him before stumbling over to his bed and lowering her onto it.
Fitz hovered above her, pressing her into the mattress and attacking her neck with kisses. Clare closed her eyes as calloused fingers ventured under her clothes and roamed over her curves, arching up to meet his touch.
"Fitz," she breathed, tilting her head back.
She felt him smirk, and then his hands disappeared from her body. Opening her eyes, she watched him unfasten his pants, before tearing her gaze away. She heard him laugh.
"Aww, don't be shy. It's nothing you haven't seen before." He taunted, reaching down and working on the buttons of her top. He didn't remove her shirt completely - simply pushed it aside so that he could unclasp the front of her bra. He licked his lips, gazing at her hungrily.
Fitz finally stopped staring at her breasts long enough to hike up her skirt and tug off her panties. After tossing them somewhere behind him, he spread her legs and positioned the head of his erection at her entrance.
With one hard thrust, he was inside of her.
Much later, the two of them lay panting and exhausted, their limbs tangled and skin glistening. The room reeked of sweat and sex, but that was nothing new. Trying to sit up, Clare hissed when she felt the ache between her thighs. She was still sore; Fitz had been particularly aggressive that night, and had taken her more than once, until he was completely spent.
When her breathing returned to normal, she carefully untangled herself from Fitz's embrace and got up, searching for her discarded clothing. She found everything but her underwear; frowning, she cast a suspicious glance at Fitz. He smirked at her and she knew then that she wouldn't be getting them back. Another pair lost. She wondered why she even bothered to wear anything under her clothes during her rendezvous' with Fitz. With an irritated sigh, she sat on the edge of his bed and started buttoning up her shirt.
Strong arms enveloped her from behind and pulled her against a hard chest.
"Don't go…" Clare shuddered as Fitz's breath tickled her ear. "Stay… please…"
"I can't." She said softly. "I have school."
"So?" He countered.
"It isn't right…" she murmured. "This… this is wrong. I shouldn't be here."
"You always say that. But you always come back."
When she didn't answer, he went on. "It's not fair. He doesn't deserve you." Eli. He was talking about Eli, but she didn't know why.
"And you do?" She asked.
"No." He said bluntly. "But… I want you." He kissed her neck, and keeping one arm around her waist, he used his other hand to tilt her head so that she was looking at him. "I could make you happy, Clare. Just give me a chance…"
Clare averted her gaze. "I can't. I love Eli."
Fitz promptly barked out a laugh. "You have a funny way of showing it, angel-face. Try again." He was getting annoyed. She could hear it in his voice.
"I'm with Eli, Fitz." She reminded him.
"But you belong to me!" Fitz snarled possessively, tightening his hold on her.
"No," Clare shook her head, "I -"
He cut her off.
"I was your first, remember?" He sneered. "You showed up here and threw yourself at me after he rejected you. Remember that?" Clare swallowed hard, her heart pounding. Her breath hitched when she felt his hand on her knee suddenly, inching upward until he reached her thigh. His fingers traced the scar he'd left behind all those months ago. "Eventually, your little boyfriend is gonna find out about this. About me and you. And when he does, what do you think's gonna happen?" Clare closed her eyes, guilt consuming her. She didn't even want to think about that. Fitz pressed on, however. "He's gonna leave you, Clare. But you know something? I'll always be here - because you're mine." He nipped at her earlobe. "You know that, don't you?"
Tears blurred her vision, but Clare refused to let them fall, even when Fitz continued to taunt her.
"Say it, Clare. Say you're mine. Let me hear you."
Her head spun. His fingers, previously resting on her thigh, wormed their way inside of her. Clare gasped, thrashing wildly in Fitz's arms, torn between trying to get away and wanting to give in to his ministrations. Her core throbbed as his fingers plunged in and out of her, still sensitive from earlier, but she could feel a familiar heat pooling between her legs.
"Fitz…" she moaned, unconsciously rocking against his hand in an attempt to relieve herself faster.
"Say it," Fitz growled, quickening his pace. "Say you're mine!"
When he bit down on the juncture between her neck and shoulder, Clare finally came undone.
"See? That wasn't so hard, was it?" Fitz soothed, stroking the side of her flushed face.
Clare lay curled up beside him, trembling. Her entire body was worn out; she couldn't even find the strength to respond to him.
He shifted, making himself comfortable and wrapping his arms around her, ensuring she couldn't escape. After a few minutes, Fitz's breathing grew softer, and Clare knew he was out. Her own eyes drooped. She longed for sleep, but her mind was buzzing, her subconscious screaming at her and making it impossible.
"… love you …"
Barely a whisper. She was surprised she'd even heard it, but she did, and almost instantly she felt sick to her stomach. Guilt coiled around her, suffocating her. She felt disgusted with herself for what she was doing to Eli, and to Fitz. Eli would hate her if he ever found out - when he found out.
But it was too late to stop. She liked the way Fitz made her feel.
Wanted. Desired. Like she was the center of his world. She didn't have to compete with any ghosts.
That's why she would always go back to him.
Ugh, I hate how this turned out. It sounded way better in my head. I tried re-writing it like a dozen times, never quite satisfied, and this is what I ultimately ended up with. And guess what? I'm still not satisfied. So I won't blame you guys if you hate this, because trust me, I do too.
Once again, Fitz isn't evil. I will never write Fitz as evil. He's just… not all there. He sort of clings to Clare because she's essentially the only good thing in his life. And he will do anything to keep her. His behaviour flip-flops a lot in this; one minute he's nice, and the next he's… not so nice. Again, not all there in the head.
As for Clare… yeah, I have no idea. I don't think she'd ever cheat on Eli, but for the sake of this fic… she does. I wrote Just A Reminder back when part one of "Umbrella" aired, before we found out about Eli's hoarding and whatnot. So… yeah.
I have no idea what else to say. Umm… please REVIEW and let me know what you think?