A/N: Um... please don't kill me. To be honest, this update, in my own opinion isn't really the best - but I really would like to finish my stories at some point, though I feel my heart really isn't in it too much (or at least this category). You might be able to see that in this chapter, I don't know, haha. Will be wrapping this story up soon, so please enjoy. :)


is it ever gonna be enough?

all the noise, all the voices

never stop

chapter nineteen

"Mayo-chan! What a lovely surprise!"

If she didn't know any better, she would think from the wide smile and glittering eyes that he genuinely meant it. Then again, this was him – he probably did, in his own warped way. If she knew better, she would have known to repress her first impulse.

But, like always, she has learned nothing. Her hand snaps out, ready to make an impact with his face. Just as quickly, if not more, his own hand lashes out before any hit can be made, his long, spidery fingers wrapping tight around her wrist. She holds in a whimper as they squeeze so hard she feels like her wrist might break.

"You're in a pleasant mood as always, aren't you?" Still smiling, he flicks his hair back with his other hand. "What's the reason for tonight's visit, hm?"

She ignores the painful throbbing in her wrist, and without missing a beat, she says, "I'm ending it. Tonight."

Izaya lets go of her wrist, which manages to infuriate her more than if he had held on. It means he does not percieve her to be a threat.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk," He clicks his tongue, "Still haven't learned, I see. I mean, seriously, Mayo-chan... this makes it what – the third try?"

"Third...?" She echoes. Mayonaka remembers blacking out that night in her apartment, the night Shizuo had come running to her apartment – had she done the same thing before? And still failed?

"That's right, that's right!" He confirms, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Not that you'd remember, ha ha!" Her jaw tightens as he leans close. "But I do. I remember very well," he whispers.


"I trusted you!" She shrieks, eyes wide. Tears are coursing down her face, and they mix with the smudges of blood on her cheeks. Pink drips down and off of her chin. "You lied to me... You..."

"I'd say half of it was your own fault, Mayo-chan. You're the one who was eating the words right out of my hands. I didn't even think you'd go that far, to be honest. I mean, really! Who would believe someone when they tell you your parents are conspiring to kill you?"

The knife in her hand falls to the floor. It clatters when it lands, right next to her mother's face. When she looks down at her parents, their eyes are blank, dead – but she can almost see the betrayal, the pain and surprise in them. Dimly, she blames it on the lighting.

He'd lied to her, yes; but had he been so wrong about her? She hadn't known him long at all – and look at what had happened. She'd trusted him so blindly, so stupidly, and now she had no one.

Izaya had come over her house a few times before. Her parents had never really cared – they didn't care about too much other than work and her grades. Mayonaka could remember the moment so clearly...

Laying on her stomach in bed, she lazily flips another page of a fashion magazine as she hears Izaya come in. "What took you so long?" She drawls. When there is no answer, she curiously looks towards her bedroom door.

His face looks unsually grim – it doesn't look right on him. He looks back out towards the hallway, almost nervously, she thinks, before he shuts it quietly. "Mayo-chan..."

"What is it?" She is almost concerned for him; never before has she seen him look like this, all signs of cockiness gone.

"I overheard something when I came in. Your parents, I don't think they heard me come in, but I... I..."

Her curiousity now properly piqued, she sat up. "Spit it out, Izaya! You can't just say something like that and not finish your sentence."

"They're planning on … on killing you!" He blurts out, dashing forward, his hands grabbing hers.

"That's real funny," She rolls her eyes, "Try again next time, alright?"

"I'm... I'm not joking, Mayonaka."

Her eyes swivel to his face. Izaya never, ever used her full name. There is a dead serious look in his eye that makes her believe him, concern etched onto his delicate features.

"W...what?" She hates the quivering sound of her own voice. Swallowing thickly, her mind begins to reel.

"They said... they said that tomorrow, they were going to poison your breakfast. They think you're a huge disappointment, that they wish you'd never been born. I think they've caught on to what you did to your ex. It does seem a little suspicious."

She is speechless. Poison her? Her parents?

"You need to run, Mayo-chan. You can come live with me in Shinjuku, you'll be safe-" He halts mid-sentence. "Then again, they are your parents. They can always issue a missing persons report, and when they have you back..." He trails off, and her mind finishes the statement for him.

"What do I... what do I do?" Her voice is hushed, frantic – she glances at the door as if her parents will come in charging at any moment.

"You know what you need to do... Mayonaka."

Izaya himself cannot be any happier with how this whole affair is turning out. Here she is, this girl that clearly has mental problems, ones that her parents have neglected seeing. Maybe if they had, she wouldn't have been this way.

Wouldn't have met Izaya, standing on top of the roof with her head filled with sadistic fantasies. Wouldn't have trusted a stranger so easily, in such a short span of time.

Wouldn't have pushed her ex-boyfriend off of a building.

He supposes killing once must almost be like a gateway drug – it can only open more possibilities, more terrible things for her to do. The first time is the hardest, he's heard. And the fact it is Izaya relaying this information only cements this crazy idea in her mind, since she has found what she thinks must be a kindred spirit. Like all other humans, she is stupid.

"I'll be here for you, every step of the way..."


"Whatever. That's in the past. This is now-" She utters, with no recollection of what he may be talking about.

She is praying beyond hope that he doesn't see her hand slip into her pocket. She fingers the knife, licks her lips. Enough is enough. This has gone on too long. Once this is over, she can live normally - and if he allowed it, with Shizuo. She can almost taste it on the tip of her tongue, a sweet dream of how things can be, just the two of them.

"-And right now, I have to end this." Quickly, her hand emerges from her pocket and she brings the knife up – but a voice stops her.

"Mayonaka!"

She knows that voice anywhere – especially since she's heard it just a short while ago. Even in the shitty flourescent lighting of the hallway, his hair still gleams like the sun, his coffee eyes centered on hers. Mayonaka wants to run to him, wants to tell him to leave them be because this is her burden, but she knows anything and everything will fall on deaf ears.

And in the hallway, the three of them stand in a moment's silence. It is the calm before the storm, before everything will change – whether that is for better or worse.


A/N: What do you want to see happen? Only one or two chapters left, so please review and let me know! Again, I apologize if this chapter is disappointing after such a long wait. Thanks for reading.