Authors Note – Hi all I just want to confirm that I do not own the characters that will appear in this story nor do I know any upcoming spoilers as of writing this is just for fun. Also please note that the timeline in this story may not fit in with the show

As a fan of Glee I have become hooked on KURTOFSKY and I would sincerely hope that down the road some of what I write may become reality. The Story I will write will be about the struggle Dave Karofsky has in coming to terms with his own sexuality and his undeniable feelings for one Kurt Hummel. Who knows what may happen as I write but time will tell

Chapter *1* admitting who you are

It had been a long 6 months since Kurt Hummel had left McKinley High to move to the all boys school Dalton Academy, but David Karofsky knew that there had been no one to blame for this but himself and what made matters worse was he couldn't speak to anyone about it, not his family because they just wouldn't get it, His best friend Azimo because it would freak him out a little if he knew his mate happened to be gay. And most importantly the one person he felt understood what he was going through Kurt.

Dave knew Kurt would not give him the time of day let alone be a comfort to Dave in his time of need. This was because Dave had driven Kurt away with bullying and that damn kiss. Dave went over it all in his and made many attempts in his head to wish away the silly things he had done but he knew that his actions that day in the locker room might have cost him the one and only way he had to be who he truly was and he has regretted it ever since.

The end of the school year was rapidly approaching and because Dave was in his senior year at McKinley he had also spent the last 6 months trying to avoid the embarrassing failure that would be his life if he didn't graduate. On more than one occasion he has been told by teachers that if his grades didn't improve then he would not graduate and worse than that he would be unable to continue with football and hockey which was the one release Dave had and on a final note that it may become the inevitable situation that he may need to repeat his senior year.

On a mild Thursday morning Dave jumped into his car at approx 6.30am deciding he would go to school early and grab a workout before classes started. As he switched his car stereo on to listen to some music he listened for a few minutes before deciding that he would stick a cd in as that had to be better than anything on the radio. he shuffled through some cds and came across a blank cd and stuck it in before realising that this was a recording of Kurt singing with the new directions Glee club that he had acquired with much privacy and as he heard the tones of Kurt singing a smile came across his face as he closed his eyes and imagined himself to be in a better place in his life in many more ways than one, then all of a sudden he shook his head and turned the volume down and decided he had best set off to school.

On arrival at school the gates were opened and one or two students had already arrived this was common at this time of year when school was starting to wind up and students were coming in to ensure final assignments were in on time and to study for any tests they still had to complete. Dave stepped out of the car grabbed his bag and set off to the gymnasium where he did a half hearted work out then grabbed a quick shower when he was shocked to the sight of his best mate Az standing in the door way , quickly dressing himself he went to Az and said hi but something wasn't right here Az wasn't smiling and uttered a few barely audible words to Dave 'Bud we gotta talk ' and without question Dave replied 'Yeah sure we can go into the choir room the Gleeks use as no one would be in at this time '.

As Dave entered the room he grabbed 2 chairs one for himself and one for Az and as both boys sat down Az couldn't lift his eyes off the ground as he began to talk ' Yo man we have been mates since kindergarten and we have shared everything many good times but big D you have changed a lot recently and I feel as if I don't know you and its messing me up and I gotta know what's eating you and making you so different, I'm kind of worried and I thought it best to ask you straight up man '

Dave had sort of expected this to happen and to be honest was a little surprised it hadn't happened sooner but wasn't sure what he wanted to say to Az. As he wasn't sure what would happen if he told the truth he sat silent which wasn't helping matters. 'Big D I want to know the truth and you are going to tell me before we leave this room ' was the matter of fact statement that had just left Asimov's lips. Dave felt a cold shiver down his spine as he knew deep down he didn't want to lie to his best mate anymore and after the last 6 months of trying to get his grades ups and all the Kurt stuff he started at the beginning so Az knew where all this had came from ' well you remember at junior school we had that big fight just before we left ?' to which a unsure 'yes' came from Az

'You called me all sorts of names like Fag /Homo /Princess and I got real pissed off and we started to fight till Miss Jones had to tear us apart and then we were told that had it not been so close to the end of the year we would have been suspended or worse , well we have never spoke of that incident again after that and that kind of is how this all started ' Az looked bewildered as he stared on at Dave wondering where this was going !. As Dave continued ' well the reason I have been so distant is I am trying to figure out who I am and wondering where I fit in to this crazy world. Then we came here and had a laugh during our first year here then it all changed when Kurt Hummel came here all proud and confident about who he was but yet we bullied him we did things I have to admit I aint proud of and neither should you be and I have come to the understanding is we did this because we didn't know how to deal with it so we went with a stereotypical response which was damn ignorant '

Az couldn't deny what Dave was saying as he had heard the same rant from his folks about being grown up and a man but he knew Dave just wasn't letting everything out and that before this chat was over and after everything was said it would be clear what the issue had been. As Dave wriggled in the chair and stood up to stretch his legs he started talking again ' You know Az we were cruel to Kurt and his friends and I'm the reason he left 6 months ago and I am so ashamed but the really hard thing is I have had to come to terms with what I have done and why I did them and I'm going to tell you everything but I want to listen carefully before you say anything ' to which Az simply nods ' I kissed Kurt in the locker room because he was in my face one day and it was the only way I could shut him up and then before I realised what I was doing I went in again for a 2nd kiss but this time he pushed me away and then I ran ' Az sat there silent as requested and showed no sign of any emotion like anger , surprise or shock just silent.

'Kurt made several attempts to try and talk to me about what happened to see why I had done it and to let me know there was people I could talk to if I was confused about my sexuality but all I did was push him away because there is no way on this planet that I was a ... like him ' Dave decided it best not to use any bad words like Fag or homo because that wasn't how he sees himself now .

Az stood up and simply said Dave get to the point you aint getting nowhere like this . Anger now boiling up in Dave because of the outburst caused him to say what he wanted to say but not in the manner he had hoped for ' OK OK ... I'm Gay is that what you wanted to hear. This is what the last 18 months has been building to , I was and still am jealous of Kurt at how he has the strength to deal with us Jocks and yet I couldn't face my mates with the true me ' as he uttered these final few words a small tear fell down and he turned away from Azimo in shame to feel the surprising hand on his shoulder turning him around ' Look at me Big D – what kind of mate you think I am ? you think I didn't know how could I not, you had been perving on Hummel for so long I noticed and so did a few of the guys but the one reason no one ever said anything was because I warned them off they were told until you were ready to tell us then no one could say anything to you or do anything ' .

Dave stunned as he looked at his friend in the face with even more tears coming he fell to his knees crying his heart out mumbling something that sounded like 'thanks Az ' all his burly mate could do was get on his knee and hug his mate to remind him that 'I will always have your back Big D it don't matter to me if your gay or not all the more girls for me ' he sniggered as he said the last part to Dave. When Dave got up and composed himself he grabbed Az's hand and shook it and said thanks I really appreciate this but I have so much still to fix and I don't know where to start to which Az replied 'This afternoon you get to the field and you practise hard we got the big end of season game to come and everything else will fall into place and Dave ill support you all the way ill help where I can and then you can start to look forward to the future '