AN: So, this is completely different then anything I have written before. First, it's not at all serious, it's a self-imposed challenge to see if I can write comedy. It was a funny thought which wouldn't leave me alone. I do not think this is what was happening to Sam down in the pit ... but it would be pretty funny if it was. This is just a short little prologue. Hope you enjoy it! ~Ella
Prologue: Death's Arrival
Death was never surprised.
If he stretched his memory, and thought about his entire existence, he could think of only four times when he had been completely and truly shocked. He had never anticipated that collecting Samuel Winchester's soul from the deepest part of hell would be one of them.
As he went to enter the cage, he had thought that he knew exactly what to expect. Lucifer and Michael would be torturing the Winchester boys, ripping their flesh and souls apart in their frustration. When he heard the anguish scream he had not even flinched. In some small part of him, he fully believed the Winchester's had earned the right to be in hell – messing about with the natural order had consequences. Not that he was completely unfeeling towards them. After all, as long as Dean kept searching after the souls ... the boys had their uses.
Another anguished scream, followed by ... laughter? Perhaps Lucifer and Michael had finally cracked.
Turning the corner, ready for the bloody scene, Death's jaw actually dropped.
Sam, Adam, Michael and Lucifer sat cross-legged on the floor playing a card game.
"Just give me the five," Adam demanded angrily as Lucifer tossed his card down in frustration. Sam and Michael sat laughing as their siblings squabbled.
"You heard me ask Sam for that," Lucifer grumbled, none of them had yet realised Death had joined them.
"Well, so what bitch?" Adam smirked. "You're such a sore loser."
"What are you doing?" Death asked, causing the four of them to look up briefly from their seat.
"Playing go-fish," Michael replied calmly before continuing the game. "Sam, any aces?"
"Go fish," Sam said, his eyes darting back up to Death. "Um, so, what are you doing here?"
"I have come to collect your soul," Death said, gaining back his usual unruffled manner.
"Oh, so, um, you know where my body is?" Sam asked hopefully.
"Yes," Death gave Sam a chilling smile. "It's been topside for almost a year."
"Called it! We so called it" Adam said. "Pay up bitches."
Grumbling Lucifer and Sam reached into their pockets, Death watched in fascination as chocolate bars passed hands, with Michael and Adam receiving a pile of them for some unknown reason.
"Don't be such a sore loser baby brother," Michael smirked, taking a bite out of the candy. "You can't win them all."
"Wait," Sam said, eyeing Death speculatively. "Did Dean make a deal with you? Is that why you are here?"
"Yes," Death said slowly, trying to wrap his head around what he was seeing.
"Michael, pay up," Lucifer said with glee, as Michael had to then give back all his chocolate.
"That was such a sucker bet," Adam shook his head in mirth, as he got handed his winnings. "I can't believe you fell for it."
"It could have been someone else," Michael defended.
"Dude, you do not know Dean," Sam chuckled. "No wonder you couldn't get him to say yes."
"Don't make me hurt you," Michael growled, practically crackling with energy. Death gave a sigh of relief, finally, what he had expected.
His relief was short lived when the other three just laughed at the angry archangel.
"What are you doing?" Death asked, not liking how they seemed to have become completely unpredictable in the past 180 years.
"Collecting our winnings man," Adam smirked cheekily at Sam, who rolled his eyes and gave him a light slap up the head. Adam glared at him. "Dude, not cool."
"Why are you sitting around playing go-fish?" Death demanded. He had expected torture, not children's games.
"Well, I wanted to play poker .." Sam started to say.
"NO!" Adam, Michael and Lucifer yelled.
"It's against the rules," Lucifer reminded him.
"Rules?" Death asked, feeling very uneasy.
Shrugging, Michael shrugged, before explaining. "Here, you can read them yourself."
Lucifer snapped his fingers and a binder appeared in his hand. Giving it to Death, he started to read it.
"Rules of the Cage: These rules are to be followed so that we don't just go crazy over the course of eternity ..."
AN: So, starting in the next chapter the format will be rule and then backstory behind the rule. I just thought, as soon as characters in the show started saying Sam's experience in hell would have been so horrible, that it would be hilarious (to me at least) if it wasn't. This isn't much of a chapter, but it'll get better. This story will wrap up before the end of the hiatus. It's more like a fun side-project to keep me sane until then. This is the first time I have written anything that was completely just fun and silly, please review and let me know what you think. Because I will admit -I am out of my comfort zone a bit. But my last self-imposed challenge went wonderfully ... hopefully this one does too. RR ~ Ella