"If you were gay…"


Note: I do not own Criminal Minds or any of its characters. And any quotes will be in italics.

"Oh, Aaron-"

"It's alright Haley," Aaron sighed. "Would you put me on the phone with George?"
"What?" He could hear the confusion in her voice. "Why-"

"Just do it." His voice cut her off and he winced at her hurt gasp.

"H-he wants to talk to you." Haley said in the background and there was the sound of the phone being transferred.

"Awww, are you going to beg me now?" Foyet's voice came over the line, taunting him. "Plead with me not to hurt your precious little bitch and bastard?"

Hotch fought to keep his tone under control at these words. "No, I think we need to talk." He paused. "About us."

There was silence on the other end. "What?"

"Well, obviously this is going to be hard, but I think we can make it work."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Foyet spat.

"Us!" Hotch said, as if it was obvious. He made a sharp left; almost there, he just had to keep the man talking. "It's going to be difficult but it's really important to me that we have a healthy relationship and you killing my family… it's just not going to work if you do that."

At this point both Foyet and Haley were staring at the phone with horrified expressions on their faces. "Look man," Foyet replied, unsure what to make of the conversation. "As far as enemies go I think I'm being pretty tame. I mean-"

"No, George!" Aaron shook his head. "I'm not talking about us as enemies I'm talking about us as lovers!"

"WHAT!" Haley and Foyet both shrieked at the same time, but Aaron went on undeterred. If he didn't completely draw Foyet into the conversation, the man would see through the ruse and kill Haley before Aaron even made it to the house.

"I mean, don't get me wrong," Aaron continued, " I love you too, but my son will have to come first or at least be of equal importance, and even if Haley and I aren't married anymore, she's Jack's mother so you can't kill her. It will just upset me. And-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, we are not lovers!" George protested.

Aaron gave a chuckle as he pulled up to the curb around the corner from his house. If he drove into the driveway George would hear the car and realize Aaron was stalling. He'd have to continue on foot. Walking as fast as he could without letting the sounds of his steps be loud enough to reach the phone, he kept taking. "I know, I know, getting technical, aren't you? But we will be soon enough!"

"Hey," Hotch was pleased to hear a note of panic in Foyet's tone. "I don't know where you're getting this idea, but I am not gay!"

Aaron rounded the corner and saw the house right up ahead. He had to work hard not to rush forward. "Alright, so maybe you're bi, but I finally get it now and I'm sorry it took me so long."


"I get what you were trying to tell me now. I mean now that I see it I can't believe I didn't see it before. I thought that spending time with the female victims meant you were a hebophile but now I see you were just being gentle with the males because you were attracted to them." George tried to protest, but Aaron just kept going. "And then contacting me instead of Prentiss or one of the other women on my team to make the deal? And even before that when you got out the hospital from the 'attack', you insisted on spending time with me. It was so obvious I-"

"I was just-"

" And then when you broke into my apartment and you started undressing and the whole impotence thing when you said that you'd change the way I profiled… well you did, although I'm glad you didn't go so far as to rape me." At this time Hotch reached the house. He drew his gun and quietly opened the door. He could hear the voice in the next room and knew he had to keep his own down as he made his way up behind Foyet. "I mean I want our first time to be special." Aaron could see the man ahead and kept going as silently as possible.

"There isn't going to be a first time!" George shouted.

"I know." Aaron whispered in Foyet's ear, coming up behind him, and he brought his gun down on the man's head.

"Oh, Aaron!" Haley cried, running to him.

"Daddy!" Jack squealed, not fully aware of what had just transpired.

Hotch motioned for them to stay back until he had cuffed Foyet, just in case the man woke up. Then he drew them into a big hug. Now they could be a family again.