Author's Note: I have a strange fixation with a cross-dressing Poland, specifically skirts – school uniform skirts. I bet Liet feels the same way as I do, if not, more extremely. *cackles* Don't ask about the title though, it's random. Anyhoo, read and enjoy! Don't forget to review! No flames, please – but critique's are welcomed!

Pairing(s): LithuaniaxPoland / TorisxFeliks

Genre(s): Romance, Humour

Warning(s): Shounen-Ai, Gakuen Hetalia Verse, Cross-dressing, Human Names

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction by a fan for fans. Hetalia Axis Powers rightfully belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya.


Feliks didn't know what to think as he stared at his reflection on the full-length mirror, his cheeks and ears coated with crimson. Contrary to popular belief, Feliks was a shy person and wasn't fond of catching a lot of attention – but he was conceited enough to think that they stared at him because they adored him.

It was the first day of classes for the second semester and when it usually was the cause of his distress, it wasn't the case this time. It wasn't even because he wore Elizabeta's clothes.

Feliks was all right wearing women's clothing but this was just completely embarrassing. He preferred wearing women's clothes than men's clothes, yes – but it's like, embarrassing!

Immediately, his hands pulled on the ends of his blonde hair in frustration and embarrassment.

Sure, he wore women's clothes but never at school! No one but Elizabeta knew he wore girl's clothing! Though, those Bad Idiots Trio, or whatever they were called, found out but they were unimportant people in Feliks' life.

"Feliks!" The voice belonging to the cause of Felik's' distress rang, followed by the sound of heavy footsteps and the door opening. "Oh, good! You're dressed! And wow, you really look cute in my old uniform – better than when I wore it!"

Feliks didn't hide the glare he felt like giving to Elizabeta, his so-called girl friend.

Elizabeta grinned at the glare and went behind her friend, pulling him to stand properly and arranged his hair. "Feliks, trust me – this is going to work!"

"It totally won't!" Feliks frowned at their reflections like a child but not stopping Elizabeta from fixing his hair. "Like, what if he'll laugh at my face?"

"He won't!" Elizabeta said, sure of herself, "There, it's fixed! Don't mess it up any more, we're going to leave for school in a few minutes and you really look cute!"

"The skirt is so like, way short!" Feliks said with an embarrassed frown.

Elizabeta shrugged, "You're nine centimetres taller than me – there's nothing I can do about that. I told you we'd ask Berwald to fix it but you refused, so there."

"Berwald's totally scary, Beta." Feliks rolled his green eyes at the older female. "There's like, no way I'm getting ten feet near him."

Elizabeta shook her head, "Look, there's really nothing we can do but cut the skirt shorter for now – which, I'm sure you wouldn't want – so, let's just drop it. But really, Feli, this one's already so cute on you! And geez! Come on, we'd better go before Natalya gets to Toris before you do!"

The mention of that name made Feliks' cheeks flush – even hearing his name made Feliks feel like his legs would turn to goo.

Elizabeta rolled her eyes and took Feliks' hand, "I know, I know. Now, come on, or else Natalya's paws will be all over Toris!"

And so, Feliks let himself be dragged by Elizabeta – he had no choice actually, with Elizabeta being stronger than 90% of the male student population in school.

"Toris is so going to love you when he sees you! Not that he doesn't love you already."

The blush came back to his cheeks as his heart skipped another beat at the mention of that blasted name. "H-He doesn't! He likes Natalya! I-I saw them t-together!"

"Sure, sure, whatever." Elizabeta replied, waving a dismissing hand.

Feliks looked down, but it was true. Toris liked Natalya, what other reason could there be than that? They were on a date together and Feliks saw them with his own two green eyes – they were even holding hands and smiling.

I like, shouldn't have agreed with her,Feliks thought as he stared at Elizabeta's back. Now, I'm in like, so much trouble.

Feliks gulped, they were near the school and he saw Toris with Eduard and Raivis entering the gates. He was sure because he didn't have bad eyesight like Eduard and his legs were slowly losing whatever strength they had with each step he took.

"Oh, To–" Feliks didn't know what came over him as he jumped on Elizabeta, covering her mouth with both his hands.

"Like, don't call him!" Feliks hissed on Elizabeta's ear.

Elizabeta pulled her friend's hands off her mouth and frowned at him, "That's the whole point of this, Feli."

Without wasting any more precious time, Elizabeta gently yet effectively push her blonde friend off of her. "My uniform's a bit dirty now but importantly, yours is undamaged. He couldn't have made it far, we can still catch up with him! Come!"

"Beta, seriously, li–"

"TORIS LAURINAITIS!" Elizabeta called cheerfully but it sounded more like a war cry making anyone within a fifty-meter radius either flinch or squeal in fear.

"E-Elizabeta," Toris answered with a gulp, turning to face the brunette. "You called?"

"Good morning, guys!" Elizabeta grinned but only made Raivis flinch and cower behind Eduard even more. "Oh, get out from there, Raivis – I'm not going to bite you. I'm not Ivan. Heck, Ivan doesn't even bite."

Feliks, who had been looking the whole time to hide his tinted cheeks and embarrassment, didn't see the three boys flinch each time Elizabeta mentioned the senior Russian student. In fact, Feliks was concentrating and mentally yelling at his legs to keep standing and refrain themselves from turning to goo.

"B-B-B-Beta!" Raivis shrilled, unable to take the verbal torture. "W-W-Who's the new student b-b-behind you?"

Raivis' squeaky voice snapped Feliks from his internal struggles but it also brought the blush to the tips of Feliks' ears. Seriously, is it like, normal for teenagers to melt from over blushing?

"Oh, this cute little thing behind me?" Elizabeta grinned sweetly, tugging on Feliks' arm.

God, I hope I haven't turned into a puddle of crap – that's so like, a real turn-on. Feliks thought, nibbling his lower lip. Dammit, since we're like, already here just like, get on with it so we can finally be done with it!

"Well, if you're thaaat interested," Feliks inwardly groaned, Elizabeta was putting more a's to her 'that' than necessary. And he could feel the stares from the Baltic Trio – but it was only Toris' staring that made him squirm.

Like, does he even notice it's little old boring – male – me?

"No!" Raivis squeaked, "No! I'm sorry I even asked! I'm not interested! I don't even think she's the cutest girl I've ever seen since Natalya! Gah! I-I-I mean, I'm not saying Natalya i-i-isn't pretty o-or anything b-b-but your friend is really cute! Oh-cr-gah! I-I-I mean – I don't find her cute at all!"

Elizabeta blinked at Raivis as she and Feliks both had the same thought, the boy had one hell of a poor childhood. But Feliks had to thank whoever tortured the kid – his blabbing had helped in getting rid of the warm, tingly, nervous-as-hell feeling Feliks was suffering.

"Eh... Um, hey, I've got a great idea!" Elizabeta chirped, clasping her hands together and smiling at Toris, "Toris, can you walk Feli to hi—"

"Sure!" Toris answered almost immediately, sounding almost very eager to Feliks' ears. "No problem!"

"Really, that's wonderful!" Elizabeta grinned and all but threw the blushing and gooey Feliks' to Toris. "Have fun!"

Feliks stared in horror at his so-called girl friend. It was a look that screamed, WTF? Girlfriends so don't do this to each other! BETA, YOU'RE SO LIKE, DEAD!

"I love you, too, Feli." Elizabeta replied with a 'Good luck! I know you can do it! And please tell give me all the details later!' smile.

Feliks was just about to yell the most colourful words that even Gilbert and Arthur would blush upon hearing but he felt a warm hand grasp his own, eliciting a blush on his already red cheeks.

There was a tug and he was once again, pulled away but this time, it wasn't Elizabeta pulling him – it was Toris. Toris.

And they were going alone since that was Eduard and Raivis being held back by their shirt collars by Elizabeta. She is so totally dead, Feliks swore. But he'd only hunt the girl after all this was over – right now, he had to focus on walking. He didn't want Toris to drag him around – that would just be too embarrassing.



"Y-You first," Toris offered shyly.

"U-uh, n-no, it's all right." Feliks replied, looking down. How long was Toris going to keep holding his hand? It was surely going to melt at this rate! But I like so wish this moment will last like, longer – no, forever! "You go ahead."

"Okay," Toris said after a moment, "So, Feli–"

"Toris!" A voice called, but it sounded more like a hiss – though, whatever, it made Toris stiffen and grip Feliks' hand tight.

"N-Natalya!" Toris squeaked and Feliks covered his mouth with his free hand when he was about to gasp, as if they were forbidden lovers caught by the wife – which was kind similar except for the fact that he and Toris were not anywhere near lovers.

"I-I didn't expect you so early," Toris said, letting go of Feliks' hand as he chuckled nervously. "I-I-Is there anything I can do for you?"

"Carry my books." Natalya ordered, holding out her thick as hell books to Toris.

Toris gulped nervously, unable to do anything about the bullying. He took the younger girl's books then glanced to his side, quickly thinking up of an explanation to offer—

"Šūdas!" Toris cursed and dropped the books due to shock and worry.

Natalya gasped then glared dangerously at Toris, "You–"

Toris' head snapped back to her, his eyes wide with fear from seeing Natalya's glare, but he was much more worried for the missing Feli. "I-I need to! Ciao!"

"Come back here!" Natalya shrieked as Toris ran down the hall as if the hounds of hell were after him, "You're not even Italian, bastard!"

He was sitting his ass down on the cold tiled floor, burying his face on his knees as he sulked and replayed the event in his mind.

He wasn't sure why his legs brought him here to the boys lavatory or why he was sitting on the unclean floor, which probably was because his leg bones melted or something – but Feliks didn't particularly care at the moment. He didn't care for much about the world at that moment, actually.

"Geez," Feliks pulled on his hair in frustration, "How stupid can I get? It was totally stupid of me to think this would like, work! Seriously, what the hell was I even thinking? Urgh! Like, I can't believe I even wore this tre gross skirt in the first place!"

"Durna spódnica! Durny psychopata! Durnowaci Węgrzy i Litwini! Cholerni kretyni!" Feliks whined, gripping his hair in the process as he unknowingly let the tears fall from his face. "OMG! I cię nienawidzą, Liet!"

"Are you serious about that?"

Feliks froze upon hearing that voice, that stupid voice who's owner is the cause of all this crap. Then suddenly, it dawned on him—

"Oh, like, shit. He like, heard that? As in, all of that? Wait, he understands Polish?"

"Yes, I heard most of it. From the tre gross skirt to that last bit of Polish." Toris answered, imitating how Feliks even said it. "And I've known you since I was a child, of course, I'd understand Polish."

"Like, are you some kind of mind reader now, huh?" Feliks shot back.

"You said it out loud." Toris replied, trying to maintain his voice – stop changing the topic, dammit!

A blush crept up to Feliks' ears. Could like, anything go even worse?

"Feliks, open the door." Toris demanded then on a softer tone, "I've been looking all over the school for you – so please, open this door."

"No!" He was like, looking for me? Then like, does that mean... He like, frickin' knew it was me the whole frickin' time?

"I said, open the door, Feliks!"

"I like, said, no!" Feliks whined, a blush appearing on his cheeks as it all dawned upon him – Toris knew it was him the whole time! LIKE, GAH! "I am so never opening this stupid door while you're like, there!"

"Fine, then!" Toris replied, "I'm leaving!"

Then Feliks could hear the loud stomping towards the door and the loud slam of the door that followed it. Then it was dead quiet.

Feliks gulped. Like, OMG, he's so like, totally pissed! I like, never saw Liet that pissed, like ever!

The day just hit rock bottom. Toris was probably heading to class or something, he didn't care. It was clear to him, thanks to his stupidity, that his friendship with Toris was worse than over. He never sounded so pissed off before.

Feliks sighed. That's what he got for crushing on his best friend and trying to win him over from one of the most sought after girls in campus – if only she wasn't a psycho.

He stood up, his bones now were back to a cold, normal state thanks to Toris' sudden outburst. Like, what's he so pissed off about? I should like, be the one pissed off here!

He dusted his skirt and thought of ways to avoid Elizabeta, he didn't want her to know everything that just happened because he was sure she'd get another crazy idea and Feliks was already tired. Toris hated him, there's no way he could change that.

"I like, might as well get back home and like, change to a pair of pants." He muttered to himself, "And totally skip the rest of the day – it's not like someone else like, cares."

With Toris hating him and Feliks was sure of that, there'd be no one to nag at him for waking up late, sleeping late, eating this or that or even skipping school. Toris was out of his hair.

Like, fine! It's totally better this way! I'm like, a phoenix! And he's so like, a wimp! That's like, an equation or whatever for disaster! Besides, he so obviously doesn't like ponies.

But despite himself, Feliks felt that some part of him became hollow. It was as if he could hear the emptiness within himself but at the same time, he felt like he'd gone deaf. He felt numb all of over yet he also felt the burning pain on his chest.

Highschool is seriously full of drama, Feliks thought as he faced the door and opened.

Green eyes met green eyes.

Like, hell, it's so mother fucking crappy.

Before Feliks could slam the door on Toris' obviously angry face, the brunette had already grabbed him by the shoulders, pulled him out of the small cubicle and pinned him to the wall.

"Like, let go of me, you psycho!" Feliks whined, trying to push off Toris. "What, did Natalya's psycho-ness like, rub off on your or something?"

"Feliks, just shut up for once." Toris growled then smacked his lips on his best friend's before the blonde could say anything else stupid.

Feliks' eyes went wide and as much as he wanted to blink, he couldn't bring himself to do so – not with Toris looking at dead pan straight at him as the brunette kissed him.

One of Toris' hands went to Feliks' jaw and opened pulled, forcefully opening Feliks' mouth though, Feliks didn't even bother to fight against him. Toris inserted his tongue and explored the insides, feeling the warmth and tasting the flavor that was Feliks as he pressed their faces even deeper.

Oh shit. Where did he like, learn how to kiss like that?

It was without a doubt that majority of himself had turned into a poor puddle of goo because he moaned on the warm, soft lips. He clutched on the lapels of Toris' uniform and pulled the brunette to deepen the kiss.

He was nearly losing all his breath, but Feliks didn't want the kiss to stop. He was still sure that this was some kind of accident where Toris was hallucinating that he was seeing Natalya instead of Feliks. Because, Feliks had concluded, Toris had turned psycho like his psycho girlfriend.

Just like, please – let this moment last, last a little longer!

Feliks knew there wasn't much breath left of him, but he didn't care if he'd faint from lack of oxygen – his body and gooey brain didn't want the kiss to end. To the extent where he was just about to wrap a leg around his best friend's torso and grab a handful of those brown locks to hold him in place but Toris pulled away before Feliks' lust-controlled body could break lose.

Toris rested his head on Feliks' shoulder, breathing deeply, trying to catch his breath while his hands rested on the wall, trapping Feliks in place but the blonde didn't mind. Feliks leaned his head back on the wall, his arms falling loosely on his sides.

He closed his eyes as he breathed deeply. God. He didn't know if he was disappointed or happy.

The kiss broke, that was something to be disappointed about, Feliks thought with whatever functioning brain cells he had left. Then again, he was kissed – now that was something to be fricking happy about. That and that he wasn't a puddle of liquid were good enough reasons to be happy.

So, I'm like, happy. I think, ri—

"Feliks," Toris whispered breathlessly on the blonde's ear, "tave myliu."

Like, WTF? My brain cells are totally dead from that fantabulous kiss and you expect me to frickin' understand Lithuanian?

"What?" Feliks snapped, without meaning to but his body wasn't exactly stable at the moment so it should be excused.

Toris shook his head lightly and chuckled. He raised his head and looked at Feliks' slightly dazed and pissed green eyes as he pressed their foreheads together.

Feliks gulped, Toris was invading his personal space – not that he minded, no, but when did he have such green possessive eyes that seemed to just eat you whole?

Like, I so totally feel my heart jumping from my bone cage thing up to that breathing tube thing. Holy frickin' shit. Stop like, staring at me like that – God. Okay, so like, don't stop – but like, stop. Wait, what?

"Feliks," Toris said, snapping Feliks from his internal struggles. "tave myliu."

God, when did he like, turn stupid? He totally killed my brain cells and he's like, still speaking in frickin' Lithuanian!

Feliks wanted to slap the man. He seriously wanted to. He raised his hand then—

"I love you, Feliks."

—it dropped back to the side.

Did he just like, seriously say what I think he just like, seriously said?

Two hands cupped his face and tilted it slightly so that he was now looking directly up at Toris and his possessive green eyes. As he stared mesmerized, some part of Feliks' brain knew he had to say something.

I should seriously tell him that I totally love him, too!

"tave myliu." Toris repeated, "That means, I love you."

I kinda like figured that out, love. Now, like, give me my moment to shine to tell you that, too!

"I'll make you love me again, Feliks." Toris whispered as his thumb traced over Feliks' lower lip. "I'll make it so that you can't possibly think of anyone else but me."

Again? Like, what? All right, Feliks, now tell him straight - you like, never fell out of love for him EVER.


Fearful of Feliks regecting him, Toris pressed his lips on Feliks' but he felt a slight sting of regret and the kiss was cut short – Feliks would've minded and voiced out his thought about the short kiss but he couldn't at the moment since his brain had officially died on him.

Toris looked at Feliks with possessive eyes he didn't know were there, he searched for any sign of rejection from the green eyes he loved but even though it seemed as if Feliks was looking back at him, his eyes clearly showed that he wasn't in this world anymore.

"Pocałuj mnie." Feliks answered, his voice also in a daze.

Toris grinned mischievously, "If I do that, we'll both have to skip school."

"I don't like, frickin' care, just kiss me again." Feliks said, coming back to this world, and grabbed a handful of Toris' hair as he wrapped his legs around the brunette.

Their third kiss was hotter than the last and Toris didn't seem to want it to end just there. Feliks was sure of this when Toris carried him, without breaking the kiss, back into the empty cubicle and locked the both of them in there.

"By the way, I like the skirt – but don't wear it in front of anyone else." Toris said as he nibbled on Feliks' ear. "What's mine is mine."

Oh, hell. Whatever strength he had left him. Feliks was as good as a vegetable – he'd be worse if Toris didn't stop muttering on his ear while his hands were all over him.

"So, why were you like, on a date with Natalya last Friday?" Feliks blurted out five seconds after the last round of their love-making.

"What?" Toris gasped, sitting up from the bed – they had gotten back to Toris' place by hijacking some other student's car. "Y-Y-You saw that?"

Feliks eyed his bestfriend slash lover as he rolled to lean on the brunette's lap, "I totally did – you said you were out to like, watch the movies with that dweeb and quiver-legs but I like, ran out of sparkly pink paint for the pony stables so I like, went out to buy sparkly paint then I like, saw you and Natalya holding hands coming out from the movies."

"It's Ivan's fault!" Toris gasped, tears threatening to fall from his eyes as he looked down on Feliks, "He's stalking Yao and Natalya's ruining his plans. Then he ordered me to take Natalya out of his hair while he'd stalk Yao."

Ivan, just you wait, you frickin' bastard. I'm seriously coming after you – oh, I know! I'll storm his house with my ponies! And I'm so totally gonna use my new flaming glittery saddle! It's totally going to be awesome! I'm like, so gonna look like a phoenix!

"Ah, I see." Feliks replied with a bored voice as if he didn't care, "So, what movie did you guys watch?"

"That new Russian horror thriller, I Always Know What Did Last Winter." Toris whimpered and suddenly tackled Feliks so that they were both lying down on the bed with him holding onto the blonde boy for dear life as the images came back to him.

Feliks placed a hand over Toris' head to comfort him as he thought of many ways to get back at the psycho siblings.

Like, what the heck happened to his macho-ness from earlier?

Feliks sighed and kissed his lover's forehead, "You're like, totally hopeless without me."

"You owe me a fucking new car, got it?"

"For the last time, Lovino! I did not sell off your car to buy a million tomatos again!"

"Piss off, Tonio! You're getting me a fucking new car and that's the fucking end of it!"

"But, Lovino! I really didn't do it this time! And I can always drive you home with my car!"

"Burn in hell, Tonio!"

The End

Author's Note: This was supposed to be short but the fingers have a mind of their own. OTL I've got three more in-the-making Hetalia fics (USUK, LietPol & a Prussia B-Day Fic), so please look out for them! ^_^

Translation Notes: (Sorry for the over use of foreign phrases and sorry for messing those languages - I like, used google translate O_o)

Šūdas - Crap

Durna spódnica! Durny psychopata! Durnowaci Węgrzy i Litwini! Cholerni kretyni! - Stupid skirt! Stupid psychopath! Stupid Hungarian! Stupid idiot! Stupid Lithuanian!

I cię nienawidzą, Liet! - I hate you, Liet!

Pocałuj mnie - Kiss me

Thanks for reading! And please don't forget to review! No flames, please – but critique's are welcomed!

EDIT: Edited some Polish stuff - thanks to *KaliVasquez from deviantart for the help! :D